I wrote my post about us splitting. I’ll admit today I got sad For the first time. Idk if it’s bc of being on cycle. Or if this is normal Or what. I get I’m being a little bitch but this is the reality of my shit.

I cheated multiple times. You couldn’t pay me to hangout with her the last month. And we split and got back together 5 times over.

Now she’s gone I’m wondering if I made the right choice. I Always feel this way right before we got back together but nothing changes over time and it’s the same cycle.

My questions is what the fuck do I do? Besides lift? I’m reading NMMNG and heading to the gym. But I been home alone with her. Or the dog. Constantly thinking about this shit. What do I do to get through this?