708,359 posts

Frustrated...

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October 10, 2018
8 upvotes

It bothers me, every single day. As if the knowledge on the books isn't enough.

Read - The Manipulated Male, Alabaster Girl, NMMNG, Assertiveness, and a few others (can't remember from the top of my head). Hell, I listen to a lot of Patrice O Neil, so that's the best - of the best.

I'm 5'11''. 24 y/o Dominican. 180lb. Bench Press 245lb max, OHP 155lb, Deadlift 365lb, Squat 275lb.

Best shape in my life. I was skinny, average before working out in 2018. And yet, I always run into this same problem over and over again, here in the US. My god, its been the same annoying thing since I was 14. No girlfriend. I try to friend the girls but the conversation doesn't even get that far lmao.

Being in an all-boys Catholic HS and Military (US Navy) sets you back by a lot. ffs.

I really want to try to understand this, but I can't. I traveled to South America and women don't act this way. These women were feminine and nice. Beautiful and they took good care of themselves. Some of them asked if I had a girlfriend (Argentinean women usually do this if they're interested in you)..... and Brazilian women gave me compliments when I was just that skinny average looking guy.

Not the way I see American women. Closed-minded and short-sighted from the point I get their contacts (Instagram or phone number).

Compliments are empty, when I give it to a girl here in the US. In South America, they love it, at least 70% of the ones I tell them to. I find it even more difficult to understand as I talk to a Costa Rican girl, who I met in Peru last year, and she invited me to spend a trip to Cancun with her.

I tell myself how difficult it must be to follow up on EVERYBODY, as I try to friend as many people as possible (usually guys from class and the gym) and I imagine women experience the same problem too.

Somehow, I try to find some logical explanation why the women here in (well I live in Orlando, FL) behave the way that they do, in my view. It frustrates me, to the point where I can't even do my college homework. I can't focus at all. It throws me into a depression state and I fight this thought in my mind over and over again.

I started to go out and daygame today. I remember talking to a Brazilian girl who was working behind the counter of a small fast food stand and even my experience talking with her, showed how easy it was for her to fake a smile and say no to me asking her out. An irritated smile.

Rejection is easy. A no will stop the conversation for me. I don't care about becoming persistent. But the time I invest on a girl, is worse.

TL;DR - The approach process is a terrible experience for me here in Florida. Constant state of depression. Frustrated to the point where I need to at least go out there and TRY. I can't figure out why I can't even ask a girl out here in the US.

- I ask her schedule - it's like asking for sex

- I ask her out - it's like asking for sex

- I ask if she's free - it's like asking for sex

- she says she's free on this day - she has a history of 85% flakes and doesn't follow up with me at all, on the date (a girl I've known since June 2018)

Wtf is going on? I know women assume many things about men but I sense some kind of negativity from women. Help.

Edit: Reading Book of Pook - was hesitant on reading but these lessons sound similar to my situations.


Post Information
Title Frustrated...
Author FrankieRolls
Upvotes 8
Comments 42
Date 10 October 2018 04:59 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/203913
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/9mwjv5/frustrated/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
day gameassertiveNMMNG
Comments

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret12 points13 points  (7 children) | Copy

You're probably going to catch some shit, but who cares. At least this isn't just some retard asking for us to hold his dick for him while he pisses.

I'd find a friend who is good at pickup in FL, and start hanging out with him. Watch his game, analyze it. Then, have him watch you, and get his honest feedback. You need to fine tune. I suspect you're giving off some kind of off-putting vibe of being overly aggressive. Chill out, dude.

Or, if you really hate the Game that much, finish your school and do you thing, then go to Latin America and cash in. Pro tip though: the girls are going to be real nice because they know you can take them to the U.S. and they know that (compared to them at least) you have money and status. So be careful. And always, always, always wrap it, especially in Latin America.

Now get the fuck out of here and go game some chicks. Or shut the fuck up and do your homework. Either is good.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Pro tip though: the girls are going to be real nice because they know you can take them to the U.S.

This right here. Every time I have ever been to Brazil I have been bombarded by women. Granted the foreigner effect is real but when you come from a country where your money is worth 3.5X everyone is up your ass.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

3.5X goes a long way when you're buying coconut water for your date at 2 reais per bottle lol. Fuck I miss North Brazil for the cheap food.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Appreciate it SorcererKing. Not sure if daygame is common around here but I'll give nightgame a shot with some of my friends at the gym.

I rather have a friend or a community give me shit, to make me realize what the fuck I'm thinking. So it's been helpful. I tell myself that if I can lift the bar off the ground, I can approach a girl. My problem is comparing these two cultures and not doing anything about game here in the US.

I don't write these reports down and I end up thinking, which is the worse way to come about "understanding what your approaches mean".

[–]UEMcGillI am become McGill, Destroyer of Blue Pill4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

My son once got frustrated with an ump that was calling strikes in the dirt. He's got a sweet swing, and loves to play the pitcher and take him deep into the count. Well he's got this one kid split on the count (2-2), waiting for him to make a mistake and sure enough the kid throws one in the dirt.

"Strike!"

No every major league ump in the world would call that a ball. I would call that a ball. My son sure a shit thought it was a ball. But the ump called it a strike. In fact, the whole game he called it a strike.

My boy comes back to the dugout, frustrated and slamming his bat and helmet. "Come on Dad there's no way that was a strike!"

"He called that a strike all day."

"But it's not a strike!"

"We play the game he gives us. Not the one you want. Next time you fend that off."

u/SorcererKing is spot on. You're trying to play a game from South America, but the ump here is giving you a different strike zone. The long term take away is this, know the true nature of women. Instead of relying on gimmicks (Rico Norteamericano) master the basic skills. PUA's are good at the gimmicks, but often find themselves in over their heads once they get in an LTR, because they lack fundamental understanding.

The next at bat, my son took that same pitcher deep. Took him to a full count, and then fouled off 4 pitches in a row while the kid threw at the dirt. Finally he threw a meat ball over the plate and my boy smashed it.

Go to RooshV and get a few datasheets for your area. Daygame, nightgame, tinder, etc. what you really need to know is what's your best option. Then, you need to cast a wide net. Don't just be an elephant hunter. Cast a wide net, with many options, and then take the best game you are given.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

“We play the game he gives us. Not the one you want. ”

Gold right there.

[–]wkndatbernardus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. Ain't no one cursing the deck of cards when they get dealt a shit hand.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're trying to play a game from South America, but the ump here is giving you a different strike zone. The long term take away is this, know the true nature of women.

Damn that's good. A different strike zone. Thank you for that story u/UEMcGill. Fundamentals help and I need to take that in consideration while living here in the US. That's probably what I'm trying to escape from

[–]SepeanRed Beret7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

Poor girls in developing countries dig your beta game, but in the US you need alpha.

Read - The Manipulated Male, Alabaster Girl, NMMNG, Assertiveness, and a few others (can't remember from the top of my head). Hell, I listen to a lot of Patrice O Neil, so that's the best - of the best.

Nothing on game here.

I try to friend the girls but the conversation doesn't even get that far lmao. Compliments are empty, when I give it to a girl here in the US.

Your game is seriously weak. You're shooting yourself in the foot.

It frustrates me. It throws me into a depression. A no will stop the conversation for me. I don't care about becoming persistent. Constant state of depression. Frustrated

Dude, where is the IDGAF attitude and the abundance mentality?

Read the book of pook and the top posts on game over at the TRP forum. It sounds like you have zero clue what you're doing.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I do think about the abundance mentality, even though I had mentioned this one girl at the end of my post, I typically follow up a few times a week. It's just the lack of effort I've made to meet women I'm interested in. i.e. Daygame or Nightgame

So I started going over to the malls here and gave it a shot. Writing to reflect on what I did, like Field Reports, is something I'll start doing soon.

I usually watch comedy and know some improv. I thought compliments would work but I see it doesn't work heh.

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

It's just the lack of effort I've made to meet women I'm interested in. i.e. Daygame or Nightgame

So mr. lack of effort, why do you think you are frustrated with your lack of results?

Writing to reflect on what I did, like Field Reports, is something I'll start doing soon.

Read something on game first.

I usually watch comedy and know some improv. I thought compliments would work but I see it doesn't work heh.

Comedy and what you thought are not good sources on game. Red pill sidebar, posts and books are good sources.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Game is just a philosophy. Most of that philosophy originated from writing what they had experienced. The Rational Male, The Game, Bill Burr, they talk about this shit because they lived it out first. AND people relate to these experiences.

How else would Neil Strauss progress his game? Writing this shit down.

It would make more sense if you told me to read as a refresher or even quote from one of the books. A "good" source of game - I don't know what you mean by that.

I know one friend from the Roosh V forums who I met in Colombia and the only book he read was The Game. Daygamed for a year, just to try and practice. Now, he still goes out, daygame, and bangs models with social proof on IG. There are people who have started businesses who don't have a clue what to expect. You just need one idea to get you going.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Zemurray

No formal education. Just a fruit peddler who decided to spend half his savings for ripe bananas. C'mon man - share me what you know, advising me to go read is just half the battle.

Reading is gives you more ideas, sure, but if you read into conflicts based on the author's experience, what then? It's like going off to a book store and buying a book on fitness. 1000+ books out there, everyone's gonna say something different. Writing is the feedback system you create for yourself.

So mr. lack of effort, why do you think you are frustrated with your lack of results?

Laziness really. That moment when you leave your house and you see only one person walking on the sidewalk.

Hey neighbor!

And you realize, fuck, I gotta drive to do... what? I mentioned it on another reply the reason why I act the way I do. The cause and the effect.

The irony is that I sometimes turn small tasks like "Get caffeine to help compliment your gym workout" into a month-long journey. And if I don't have any ideas, I give up from the start. I'm just realizing this as I type this reply to, it kills productivity like a damned virus.

[–]SepeanRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Game is just a philosophy.

It is certainly not, it is a concrete skill set. If you take a single interaction with a female, there are a few things you can do that are good game, some things that are ok game, and A LOT that is non-existant or bad game.

It’s not some abstract philosophy shit. With good social skills and experience you just internalized it and don’t think about it, it just flows naturally, but that doesn’t make it any less of concrete thing. You can look at a guy talking to a girl and see how good his game is, it is not just something in our heads.

It would make more sense if you told me to read as a refresher or even quote from one of the books. A "good" source of game - I don't know what you mean by that.

I wrote that in my previous post: book of pook and the top posts on game on the TRP subreddit.

I mentioned it on another reply the reason why I act the way I do. The cause and the effect.

No one gives a fuck why you’re not putting in the effort.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Just want to make an observation here:

I traveled to South America and women don't act this way.

There ARE cultural differences, but nothing trumps biology. The fact that you were

A) probably more relaxed

B) obviously ok enough monitarily to travel

C) a novelty

etc. all factors into it.

To chase and quantify problems with women by region takes away from self responsibility.

So you find you have to change your angle with the locals... adapt. And don't get sidetracked into thinking women in other countries are all unicorns.

I bet those sweet bitches in hot tropical paradises may also have a different flavor of dealing with you if you go beta after the initial flush is over. Or branch swing quicker and with as much smiling promise as they gave you right off the street...to the next traveler.

There is no shortage of pick up artistry books, vids, etc. for U.S. chicks. All find-able through the RP main sidebar.

[–]tmh88mrp0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I bet those sweet bitches in hot tropical paradises may also have a different flavor of dealing with you if you go beta after the initial flush is over. Or branch swing quicker and with as much smiling promise as they gave you right off the street...to the next traveler.

Can confirm, I wifed one up. Everything MRP tries to address is the same, regardless of culture/race.

[–]BishBoshDosh4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy

- I ask her schedule - it's like asking for sex

- I ask her out - it's like asking for sex

- I ask if she's free - it's like asking for sex

...

I sense some kind of negativity from women. Help.

I'm guessing that you project neediness, and you're being incongruent / inauthentic, which the chickas can detect miles away, and I think you're picking up on them reflecting that back at you when you speak to them.

Have you read the Book of Pook? I think you should.

[–]BishBoshDosh1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I try to friend the girls

^ here, incongruence. Do you want to be their friend or get into their knickers? If you don't know what you want, how are the girls supposed to know what you want?

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

The whole "friend" thing comes from the idea of networking to me. It's the reason why I thought about this route.

[–]SteelToeShitKickerRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you are looking for friends, look for friends. If you are looking for lovers, look for those. Looking to find friends to turn into lovers is craven. It's the more safe route, you risk rejection less.

Looking for lovers you will find rejection more, you need to be ok with that.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No I haven't. To be honest, I would read Models first now. It just seems like its next on the reading list. Will go for Pook next.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Dude, you're coming across Needy as fuck. I was creeped out just reading this shit.

Get some fun interesting hobbies, do your own thing, go out, meet women through your social circles and friends.

But yes, You need to be practicing daygame (read day bang by roosh iv) in order to be better at talking to women and expanding your abundance- because right now you are just a creepy dude to them (giving out compliments and asking them out) because you see the world in a scarcity mindset. It’s getting worse too. The more you get rejected- which doesn’t exist by the way, just data points and learning experience- the more you dole out Compliments.

Change your success criteria from “daygaming to try to hook up” to “daygaming to hold a cool conversation with a woman without coming across as a social retard”. If you can do that,, then you can graduate to giving them compliments, flirting, bantering, asking for their number.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I probably didn't give much background info about myself but yea.... I do have "interesting hobbies". My routine revolves around gymnastics at home i.e. Planche, L-Sit, Straddle - Salsa & Bachata Dancing, powerlifting, swimming and I just do full-time school and part-time work.

I'm also a city guy, so getting using to Florida, driving around this place, forces me to improvise. Which is part of the frustration in having to go "Fucking Do It". And of course, I talk to women in way that I'm "interested" in what they do, than talk about myself.

Roosh V has good datasheets and all, I've met some great friends there. The only problem is authority on the forums. Had a friend banned there, well-respected in the community, as well as his daygame approaches, and there was no good reason why he was banned based on the PM conversation those two (Roosh and a friend) had. Don't want to go into too much detail.

I will have another look, no doubt. Creepy, not really, but acting stupid in conversations with women, yeah. The post was something to vent out because I know, I'm not taking action in abundance.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You sound really sincere,,, but you don’t have a fucking clue what’s going on.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Awareness is the most important factor I think of, everyday in life. The irony is that I sometimes turn small tasks like "Get caffeine to help compliment your gym workout" into a month-long journey. And if I don't have any ideas, I give up from the start. I'm just realizing this as I type this reply to, it kills productivity like a damned virus.

Like I mentioned before, the city life allows me to get lazy with places to daygame. A place like Virginia (where I was stationed in the military) and Florida, doesn't. I was in Medellin, Colombia too, another city where the quality (...probably 3x...) higher than it is here. The good thing is that I've started to catch myself on text conversations with taking out unnecessary words - similar to copywriting/ editing words out to sell better

Writing every morning - a brain dump of 800 words reminds me what I need to do. I just don't consider women a part of that reflection, unfortunately. And being nice to women, is mentally exhausting.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You live in one of the biggest tourist destinations in the US. Use that to your advantage and game tourists until you build abundance. Once you stop giving so many fucks about how you come across to American women, you'll see that they start responding a lot more positively.

she has a history of 85% flakes and doesn't follow up with me at all, on the date (a girl I've known since June 2018)

This is some weak shit. She isn't interested, so let her be and look elsewhere. You're giving this girl validation and getting nothing in return.

[–]gettingmymojobackRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The reason your game doesn’t work in the first world is that you come off as heavily over invested in your attempts. This makes you come off as desperate and needy. Women pick up on this from a mile away.

I recommend you read Models -Mark Manson (and the already recommended Pook) for a far better explanation than I can provide.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nothing will kill your vibe faster than subcommunicating desperation, neediness, and whinyness - and you manage to do all 3 in just 2 sentences.

My god, its been the same annoying thing since I was 14. No girlfriend. I try to friend the girls but the conversation doesn't even get that far lmao.

Here you're clearly bullshitting about trying to be friends - I guarantee it.

Being in an all-boys Catholic HS and Military (US Navy) sets you back by a lot. ffs.

And here's your whining. Because if you're going to try to tell me Military boys don't fuck, I don't know what to tell you.

Trying to make your YOU problem somehow not a YOU problem, but a WOMENZ problem, is incredibly weak.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

This reads like an incel post man. Problem is, you are just not attractive enough. Solution, work on your game and confidence. Confidence makes up for what you otherwise may lack.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Ah, incel sounds like an extreme case. Aren't incels the one who have deep hatred for women because of what they can't get from them? AFC is more mild. But I understood what you meant by this.

I do need practice. I'm just realizing that 10am-11am is a good time to go out and daygame, for weather here in Florida.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Do you have a dog?

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don't

[–]runnowxxx0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

are you even married? do u suffer from some genuine life threatening situation? or r u just a tourist leeching attention from the subs, like edward norton?

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nope. I live here. Used to live in NYC, till I moved down here a year ago.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It's a numbers game. Especially when you are a chump with no game.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bingo. All about numbers but I try to focus on quality. Everyone has their story in life, I love learning more about them. But I mean, in terms of women, I rather follow-up on what we had spoken about and what they've done throughout the day.

[–]johneyapocalypseThe one that says "Bad Motherfucker"0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

You're in the wrong part of Florida, bro.

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I've heard FSU is fun.

[–]johneyapocalypseThe one that says "Bad Motherfucker"0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

3 hours south of Orlando my Dominican compadre.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Well, poor but hurt you.

I have no idea what the fuck you look like, but why in the fuck is your head so far up your ass, that you can’t even conjure the idea of being the “Latin Lover” ? .

Your comments to chicks is run of the mill desperation. Chew on that shit

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Oh yeah. It's pretty far up there. I do focus on meeting people from class, gym, Salsa, etc and I get enough people to go out with. It's been great so far, planning it out.

Even though I get IOIs from women, I fuck myself over somehow - on conversation. Their eyes wander around my features - arms, legs, abs (if I'm swimming) but nothing comes up on the follow-up.

I hate trying to explain this but I just need to daygame to figure it out myself. I've only gone out once to look for women, that's it.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Sidebar, cut the comments.

Book of Pook. Over and over again. It’s free. Just read it until you memorize it

Edit.

Tell me you are able to pump and dump at least a HB5 ?

Replacing your hand with pump and dumps builds the abundance rather quick. As you increase your game work up the ladder

[–]FrankieRolls[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, but if she looks like she doesn't take care of herself physically, I wouldn't approach.

What also comes to mind is getting enough contacts to bring everyone together for a night out. To show some kind of leadership.



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