708,624 posts

Q: Frustrating Problem

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June 16, 2017
10 upvotes

Throwaway account for reasons you'll understand.

Background: Mid-40s, found MRP 12 months ago (lurker), following MAP, dropped 60lbs, currently 180lbs, owning my shit, receiving IOIs, wife loving it, sex gone from 1-2/mth duty sex, to 3-4/wk, finances good, parenting great.

My problem is premature ejaculation. No matter what I do or try, I can't get it under control. Seems to be getting worse as our relationship gets better.

Seems much worse after a bit of a break from sex. i.e. 5 days of shark week results in a very quick result. If we have sex 3-4 days/nights in a row, I can last forever by the day 4.

Wife seems understanding, but it still frustatres the ever living fuck out of me.

Any MRPers have any advice?


Post Information
Title Q: Frustrating Problem
Author r1a2n3d4o5m6
Upvotes 10
Comments 18
Date 16 June 2017 01:51 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/205998
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6hjld4/q_frustrating_problem/
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Comments

[–]man_in_the_worldRed Beret2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

If we have sex 3-4 days/nights in a row, I can last forever by the day 4.

Why not go for it multiple times per session, then?

[–]r1a2n3d4o5m6[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Takes about 45 minutes to get another erection

[–]anythingincRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If we have sex 3-4 days/nights in a row, I can last forever by the day 4.

Does masturbating to keep the streak alive work? If not, I wonder if you used a fleshlight or similar, with no porn, would that make a difference instead of the usual deathgrip cum-race to the kinkiest shit on the internet.

That presentation just seems so very psychological to me bro. When did it start? You have guilt about masturbating and sex growing up? Always rush to finish so nobody discovered you?

clench

You learned to do that young to hurry up.

After that comes performance anxiety. Your relationship hasn't been the greatest and there was so much pressure on sex and your ability to perform and it doesn't happen a lot and so you have to really WOW her and this is your chance....whoops. After several days in a row you feel more secure and less anxious and like you deserve this pussy.

Seems to be getting worse as our relationship gets better.

More sex, more pressure, more performance anxiety, more repressed guilt, more whatever, you can try numbing creams and shit but from what you wrote here, if I was your urologist I'd bet money with your psychologist he could fix it instead of me.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Cockring, definately a cockring.

Get the dubble rings that goes around your dick and balls.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

On top of what the other guys have offered, do you go at it more than once a night?

Let's say you explode at the 30 second mark, wait until your unit recharges then get it going again, you should last much longer.

Also, are you jerking it to porn? If so, you may have conditioned yourself to cum asap.

[–]bogeyd6Mod / Red Militia0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This OP.

[–]JDRoedellRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Whiskey dick. Always helps me go longer . But in all seriousness, this could explain the butt clenching thing. Hear me out... when you drink you tend to relax and your muscles relax. Ever hear that drunk drivers sometimes walk away from bad wrecks while sober people are broken all over? A doctor friend once hypothesized to me that it's because the drunk is over relaxed and doesn't tense up prior to impact. Ergo... drinking probably keeps your butt cheeks from clenching up as much. Find a way to unclench.

Edit: I'm not suggesting you be drunk whenever you fuck. Obviously that would run counter to "be attractive". I'm merely suggesting a correlation between whiskey dick and being able consciously relax groin and ass muscles.

[–]MisfitPL90 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Kegel excercises

[–]r1a2n3d4o5m6[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

You mean stopping and starting your piss?

Been doing that.

[–]maxofreddit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

These helped me ;)

Also, time of day seems to make a difference for me. Morning/daytime sex I seem to have better control than after the kids are in bed. I will also sometimes make sure she gets a big O in through my (or her) manual or oral style before I go in for my piece. Also, turns out the wife legitimate likes me to finish on her chest/boobage... So there's that.

Also, about 2 shots of tequila seem to have a "lasting effect."

I'll have to try the butt clenching too ;)

[–]MisfitPL90 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yes mate. I've also been doing that.

How premature are we talking?

What about swapping positions, pinching the end of your dick when you feel about to explode, concentrating on something else. How fit are you? - I have noticed with increased stamina from excercise I last longer

[–]r1a2n3d4o5m6[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

At worst, even before penetration. :(

When you don't get to a position, it's hard to swap.

I'm decently fit. 180lbs, lift twice a week, two 90min sports trainings a week, plus 2-3 mile walk every day

[–]thewholefnshow5470 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I would go see a doctor, I think they have pills for that. Seriously, why wouldn't you. The doctor won't give a fuck.

[–]thewholefnshow5470 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not sure if this is applicable for you, but, vasectomy. I was never a two pump chump, but after the vasectomy, I became porn star quality. These results may be atypical, consult your doctor.

Also, quick whacking it, quit looking at porn. Only feed him your wife's pussy. When you whack it, you are trying to get it done as fast as possible, with the highest amount of visual stimuli possible. Stop that, you are mentally putting yourself in unrealistic scenarios and you are training yourself to suck in bed. You got a real girl who's down to fuck, porn is for those without.

Get your wife on board with a practice schedule. Practice makes perfect!

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Seems much worse after a bit of a break from sex.

No Shit! The solution is to fuck ever day. If you cum to soon, continue holding and caressing your wife until the next round when you can last longer.

The Way of the Superior Lover talks about Tantric Sex that will blow your mind and take care of the premature stuff once you get good at it. Takes some practice but the practice is fun!

If that doesn't help, you may want to consider seeing a sex therapist. A basic consultation and practice is all most men need. They don't have much of sexuality figured out but they are pretty good at "curing" the premature thing. Stop-Start, Squeeze, numbing gel, tantric, focused thoughts, differential muscle tension. The cure is there.

[–]toofastfreddy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have that problem too and it is frustrating. Thanks for asking your question and bringing this up. I used to last longer when I drained my balls every 1-2 days with porn, but I've now cut it down to about once a week. Problem is I'm still on the sex every 1-2 weeks plan with the wife (trying to increase of course but at least it's up from 1x/month since starting MRP). My dick can get so sensitive and my balls feel like they're ready to burst after about 3-4 days with no sex. I'll get a boner for no reason in the shower or at night and man it's torture. It's way worse since (almost) cutting out porn. I use porn now like methadone (rather than heroine). Anyway, I'm quite fit, tried Kegel, but still end sex prematurely. Usually she's not up for round two (lack of attraction probably) The next is to try no butt squeeze or meditation. Just wanted to tell you you're not alone. Good luck Bro!



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