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What to do when someone attacks your public image?

Reddit View
January 28, 2019

Recently one of my friends attacked my image by telling a lot of my other friends that I did something (that i did not do). A couple went along with it, causing other people to actually believe it and look at me with disgust.

If I playfully go along with it (agree and amplify?), it will appear that I'm admitting to it.

If I deny it, it'll seem that I did it and am desperately trying to deny it.

If I confront him about it he'll say something like "It was just a joke, I didn't mean it" and I'll appear weak because a "joke" got me so upset.

What do I do?

Post Information
Title What to do when someone attacks your public image?
Author Piscicide
Upvotes 84
Comments 29
Date 28 January 2019 03:34 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Original Link
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Red Pill terms found in post:

[–][deleted] 160 points161 points  (1 child) | Copy

You need to cut that motherfucker off. He isn't your friend.

[–]redpharma778955 points56 points  (0 children) | Copy

This. Cut him out completely off your life with no added drama. Think of it like Ghosting a Girl but on a shitty friend. Block on everything, delete on everything, and make it known to people that you don’t associate with them.

[–]2comment118 points119 points  (0 children) | Copy

You don't AA reputation destructing things.

Call him out, publicly, for being a lying piece of shit and then cut him off.

There isn't much else to do.

[–]throwawayycheyeah73 points74 points  (3 children) | Copy

Text "so what's up? You lied to <insert people names> and said I did <thing>. Do you have some kind of problem?"

9/10 times they will back down and say something like "sorry man I was only kidding" and now you have proof hes a liar if people ask you about it.

Surely the best tactic is to just ignore it and if anyone asks about it tell them hes a liar and that didn't happen and move on though.

[–]carbonhexoxide45 points46 points  (1 child) | Copy

Had this happen to me before. Confront them directly and they will back down most of the time, especially if you lift.

[–]throwawayycheyeah38 points39 points  (0 children) | Copy

Man people are so afraid of confrontation these days I remember in high school this scrawny kid I knew and felt bad for was getting picked on on Myspace by some wanna be emo fuck. It took me like 2 days to convince him to directly message the dude and just say "what's your problem? I can be in my car driving to your house in 5 minutes if you want your ass kicked."

Emo fuck immediately backed down to a kid half his size and tried to play the whole "whoa man I was JUST joking around"

So weird how everyone is "just kidding" when they feel scared.

[–]Thizzlebot-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Texting is pussy call it out in person right away next time you see them

[–]Whatdoin2715 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

No dude, you confront that little asshole and call him on his shit IMMEDIATELY. Don't even give him the time of day either. Gather your good company and simply check his ass and ask why he's spreading rumors like a female.

The goal here is to use a form of reverse psychology here, ask him in whatever way you wish why he decided to lie like that and right after, come up with a good quick witted joke after. Make all the people around him hear this so his ass can be put on blast, just like he was trying to do to you.

An example: Say "So I heard you said (this) about me and I'm wondering why you did it? What was your goal?"

Right after you catch his ass off guard and say something like, "Only females spread rumors like that bro, that makes you look like a bitch."

I can guarantee you that you have a 80% chance of turning the tables on him right there. Another key thing to do right here is to pay attention to his reaction. Most of the time he will probably stumble by body language and say he's just joking or some other lame ass excuse. That's when you say, "Next time you joke around like that someone might knock your teeth down your fucking throat."

That's a way to amplify it. Not exactly agreeing and amplifying here, it's more like amplifying and turning tables on him.

Of course, do your best not to fight because violence is pretty dumb, but you can ALWAYS assert your dominance and protect your reputation or image.

Good luck man. I've dealt with that shit too. Do not let people do that shit. Cheers!

[–]MOSFETBJT10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck that dude's mom.

[–]i8a4re7315 points16 points  (1 child) | Copy

Crucify him and cut him off

[–]DiskKiller27 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

It depends on what that thing is. I was in a similar situation, although it wasn’t a friend (nor a “friend”). I told her very publicly that she can’t spread lies about me - and that I’m taking the matter to my lawyer unless she apologizes. So practically threatened her with a libel. She backed off.

[–]thatbadrogue210 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

confront him and cut him out publically in front of a few of the bros who believe and don't believe him. ez. if he pulls the joke thing just give some cheesy shit like "nah, you're the joke [email protected] bro"

[–]SteveStJohn4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is it! Publicly and in person. Forget texting. That's female behavior. Besides, he can then show everybody what you wrote and frame it anyway he wants.

You don't even have to seek him out IRL. Just be ready for when your paths do cross.

[–]Classy_Amir2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Outstanding move! For him. When someone spreads doubt about you, they put you in a dilemma. Are you trying to hide it? Why? Is there some truth to it? Are you going to ignore it? Is there some truth to it and you're scared to face it?

Learn from it. Protect your reputation at all costs.

To deal with this situation, start repairing your reputation little by little

[–]throwawaybpdnpd1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’d confront him in person and be ready to beat his ass

[–]A_solo_tripper3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

What is the context?

[–]hazaraMoghul1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

DO NOT defend, just ignore the situation, but do confront him.

[–]Grantevans19871 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Completely depends on exactly what was said

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I like the two pieces of advice that you received: Get him in text admitting it's not true, or call him out publicly. No matter what, this faggot is no longer your friend.

[–]SirAttackHelicopter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It depends on the person doing the act and how they are doing it. One response does not fit all situations.

The general rule is you do NOT want your reputation tarnished if you can help it. Do whatever it takes within the realm of context.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Tell him he really shouldn't run around slandering people or else he's liable to get sued for defamation of character down the road. That should make him think twice before opening his mouth again.

Also try to get to the bottom of why he did that. Did you threaten his status in some way with your existence? That is usually one of the motivators.

Also, he's not exactly the whole problem. What about all the so-called friends who believed him and had no faith in you? I've been on both sides of this situation. People's opinions are very malleable. People are often ready to believe the worst. Did any of these people bother to come and talk to you to clear things up? Once a person has been demonized, people want nothing to do with them.

If you value these people, or not, in any case, it might be a good idea to pointedly ask them why they would believe such ridiculous lies. In the meantime, start cultivating other people for relationships.

One final thing. Even though I don't know you or the situation, this tendency is so strong that I actually am wondering if you DID do the things you are accused of, but are trying to find a way to do damage control.

[–]friendandadvisor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If I playfully go along with it (agree and amplify?), it will appear that I'm admitting to it.

If I deny it, it'll seem that I did it and am desperately trying to deny it.

If I confront him about it he'll say something like "It was just a joke, I didn't mean it" and I'll appear weak because a "joke" got me so upset.

What do I do?

Do NOT A&A, I don't care how many dicks tell you to do that. That is for picking up chicks, not recovering from a man's attack.

If somebody asks about it, look at them like they just shit on their shoes, and say "WTF are you talking about???"

Don't confront him, asshole; drop him. He's no friend. Avoid him. That means when he comes up to you after a month, and says "Hey, I was just joking!" You say "No prob; look, I gotta go, let's get a beer sometime, k? Later."

[–]adonis_syche-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

Me perosnally? I actually drive people to that point when they would say "It is just a joke bruhhhh", then do something similar in that scenario and you can say it back "It was just a joke bruhhhhh"

Example : A friend of mine once started calling me gay because of my dildo collection. We were in a cafe and was my newly made girlfriend there as well (he knew we are dating, he probably liked her too but never expressed so). 'GF' cuz it was years before I even knew what TRP was.

I know when confronted he will say it is a joke, and I intentionally drove him to a point where he did say it. I mixed a sprinkler full of black pepper in his drink and he vomited fire,( next morning probably shat fire too). But when it was all going on, despite my tender heart's calling, I looked at him in the eyes and said in the sternest teen voice I could muster "It was just a joke bruuuuhh" He was miserable, and didn't talk to me for days, but he, along with other bruuuuhs understood that I am not the kind of guy to mess with.

Not to brag, but takes a pure badass to pull such things off. Your mileage may vary of course. But like they write in nuclear doctrines

" retaliation of sufficient magnitude to inflict ‘unacceptable damage’ against nuclear use by an adversary against XYZ Country or its forces anywhere"

Edit (not really) : I did have a dildo collection.

[–]beefthathasredmiddle1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Example : A friend of mine once started calling me gay because of my dildo collection.


You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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