Will I ever not have to deal with my wife being a disrespectful c*@^?

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July 13, 2019
80 upvotes

I only just started lifting and reading The Red Pill material. Long story short my wife is a horrible messed up piece of shit. She was just telling our daughter what a terrible father I am.

The question is if I pursue TRP will I ever not have to deal with this crap? Will she ever treat me properly.


Post Information
Title Will I ever not have to deal with my wife being a disrespectful c*@^?
Author Cruise25111
Upvotes 80
Comments 51
Date 13 July 2019 03:57 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/245353
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/ccqvud/will_i_ever_not_have_to_deal_with_my_wife_being_a/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
liftthe red pill
Comments

[–]krunchtimer120 points121 points  (13 children) | Copy

To be honest, it may not matter if a man has sky-high SMV, if a woman feels fairly comfortable that the man will not leave her, then she'll probably always shit-test and say disrespectful stuff to him.

Anyone else agree or disagree?

And is "dread" the cure for this?

[–]omega_dawg9395 points96 points  (1 child) | Copy

dread can fix a LOT of problems fast.

this guy is waiting for HER to take the lead and treat him properly instead of him commanding her respect as the man in her life. women don't lead... they follow... they react... they're 'empty' vessels that need to be filled with direction.

she needs a good dose of, "you straighten da fuck up NOW... or be prepared to be replaced," treatment thru ACTIONS not words.

if she's talking shit to their kids, i'd pull the plug on her. fuck that.

[–]CarterKillss1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

/u/rustygnarwhal dread game

[–]bonerpotpie21 points22 points  (0 children) | Copy

Absolutely. I've seen a lot of young, ripped dudes being treated like a shitty, yippy dog on a bejeweled leash by their overweight LTR. Fear of potential loss is hell of a drug for women.

[–]zboo1h8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agree, and yes. You're not allowed to EVER stop running game, especially on your cunt wife, who knows all your tricks.

Sounds exhausting as fuck.

[–]ThePriorityBike14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

Divorce is the cure.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dread is a decision engine.

You fix yourself, so all that is left is the relationship/her.

So are you the fuckup?

Or is she?

You NEED to be willing to burn it all down before you even consider improving yourself.

If you're not willing to leave, then you've lost before you've begun.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

SMV means nothing in an LTR if the woman views the man as inferior. A Chad doctor can treat his chubby wife like a princess and eventually she will disrespect him and view him as less

[–]bowhunter61 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Totally agree, brother.

[–]EnemyAsmodeus2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Girls are like actual trolls. They're trolls underneath a bridge, collecting taxes...

The way to defeat a troll, is to laugh at them. Their threats are empty. Their bluffs are called. Their disrespect is laughed at and then you disrespect her back. Get her mad. If you can induce a woman to become violent that is even better, it means you're doing it right.

You can also ignore their drama and not get sucked into it. You can then start commanding her that she should do X or Y "if you were her"... in fact, mansplaining would be the best method too. This is why women whine about mansplaining because it is something they cannot counter.

If she threatens a divorce, your eyes should well up in tears and you should whisper "omg I've waited for this day for a long time... thank you so much..." then give her a big hug. Then just walk away "fuck yeaaa wooh"

Oh trust me, she'll find a way to cancel those plans real quick unless she's already fucking someone else.

[–]Brushyourteethm818 points19 points  (1 child) | Copy

It should never come to any violence on either side. Ever.

You need to be the calm, immovable rock. Set a boundary and then shut the fuck up. Walk away if she gets heated. THAT is speaking through actions and she will soon get the message that disrespect will not be tolerated.

[–]Diuwu0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This. Actions speak louder than words.

[–]Ijohnored-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeahh.... no.

[–]SICFJC1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn that’s my mom

[–]andyturbo2000 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

All depends OP. Is the problem you or your wife?

[–]WIA20XX0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It is him. She might be a cunt, but he takes the abuse.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (2 children) | Copy

Your wife's lashing out is either a mental disorder(look up the Cluster B personality disorders) or she's normal and hoping you'll set boundaries and demonstrate your value. If she's bipolar or something, you're probably looking at a painful divorce and a rough relationship with the kid, though she will come around when she's old enough to realize mom isn't quite right. If she's normal and just acting out, the red pill will help you fix your marriage.

  • Lifting is good. It relieves stress and builds confidence. If the wife sees another woman admiring your muscles, she may start to act pleasant again now that she feels she needs to compete.
  • TRP is essential for all men. Even if it's too late to fix the marriage, it'll help you be a better father to your daughter and more successful if you ever return to the dating scene.
  • Make sure you have some nearby bros. Re-establish ties if your wife has isolated you from them. It'll be important to have witnesses if she goes berserk and extra sets of arms if you need to move or whatever.
  • Keep a journal(maybe New Google account + Google Docs + Incognito Mode) of any time she breaks something, lies to the kid about you, etc).
  • Hide some emergency cash in an envelope somewhere and gradually add that to an emergency fund. EG, when you go to the grocery store get 20 extra with the debit card.
  • Sign up for Credit Karma and have notifications sent to the aforementioned new email. One of the ways angry wives will mess with you is signing up for cards in your name.
  • Never get pulled into her frame. EG, you can't use logic when she's screeching like a child. Just leave to hit the gym.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Kids will come around but they likely won’t realize how fucked their mom is until at least 20s.

Hard L to take as a parent

[–]1kick610 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

She will get away with whatever she can get away with. Based on your statements: you’re not willing to walk away from this relationship so...yes, she will always treat you this bad because there are no negative consequences for her.

[–]CasualtyOfHedonism30 points31 points  (0 children) | Copy

Leave that ungrateful whore

[–]CasualtyOfHedonism14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol bump

[–]KeyRepresentative 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

If your wife isn’t disordered, this is fixable. You should tell her that behavior is unacceptable and set a boundary. Stand up for yourself and be respected.

Also hold up your end of the bargain and be a good father at all times.

[–]The_TRPThrowAway3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

No point in setting a boundary randomly when she already disrespects you. And if you do, and she crosses it, then what?

Before anyone can respect you, you must learn to respect and value yourself.

I'm not sure what the best solution is but here's my 2 cents: read the side bar, all of it. Search the main sub for posts on inner game.

Lift, learn game, dread, and develop a life outside of this broken relationship.

Then slowly start applying red pill concepts. I think applying everything at once really isn't feasible. She'll see through it and you'll come across as fake. It takes a while to fully internalize everything anyways.

Be the best father you can be (obviously) through your actions to your child - no need to verbalize. Your actions will speak louder than your words.

Without more info it'd be hard to say whether or not to leave the relationship entirely.

Im sure someone who's been married or divorced will provide some more insight.

[–]dj10416 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Need more info

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Go to askMRP. Read the instructions for posting and ask. You won't find quality answers here. Don't just be lazy and cross post this. Good luck.

Edit: The answer is yes, it is possible but you have to change yourself completely. It's not about her anymore. Red pill saves the man not the marriage.

[–]Two_kids_in_a_coat2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly this. Women will only be a piece of shit if the man allows it. OP has to fix himself.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

That question can only be answered when you really start the RP journey. Somewhere along the line you will figure this woman out exactly and then you’ll know the answer. You’re only asking because you want to know if the RP will change her. The RP will change you. You either want to become a better man or you don’t.

[–]Brushyourteethm82 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Read the drunk captain analogy with the slack in the rope - probably in sidebar.

The only thing you can control and change is yourself. You cannot tell your wife that you have changed as these are just empty words to her - you need to consistently improve yourself over time and SHOW her that you are an improving, high value male - the rope will gradually tighten and she will either get on board with your leadership or you will need to leave her behind.

If you're just talking about shit tests then no, they will never stop. It is her way of poking your masculine energy to test that you are congruent with your attitude or she is simply checking out and enjoying, similar to how you grabs your wife's arse to enjoy her.

Your attitude to shit tests will change as you start smashing them until, like me, you enjoy them playfully when they do pop up.

Keep reading, lifting and own your shit.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

[–]Brushyourteethm80 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That's the one. Thanks

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Women take the shape of the container you provide.

If she's acting like shit, then you're a toilet.

You're the problem. Guaranteed.

Go to askMRP.

Edit. Per your post history, you already know about askMRP. So posting here just emphasizes the fact you're a fuckup with no personal responsibility.

[–]BatsNightmares2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You chose to marry her. Divorce, now.

[–]anonimo4212 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

Is this a joke? Don't negotiate with terrorist. MGTOW.

[–]diceblue1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Why the self edit?

[–]volvostupidshit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What do you mean self edit? Maybe OP just realized he worded it wrong after a few backread.

[–]LilLoserFreny2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It’s a reflection of the type of man that he is, one who feels the need to edit his words and actions all the time. Probably one of the reasons why his wife feels like she can get away with her atrocious behavior.

[–]Fuktiga_mejmejs1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Leave her, im very confident that you have a LOT of untapped potential. Just started lifting? That's great see how long you can go and then some. Judging by your post she doesn't deserve you one bit, get out of there and improve your life!

[–]LilLoserFreny1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

The real question is why you are still with a insufferable bitch? No, I’m not trolling. The fact that you have allowed her to treat in you in such a manner and your inability to walk away has shown your lack of abundance mindset. Honestly at this point any temporary freeze out would not work. Your best bet is to cut your losses and divorce that bitch. Yes you will lose money, assets etc but it that really worth more than your sanity? Let this be a lesson, this is what happens when a man is incapable of walking away. This is is also why men, especially in today’s day and age should not get married. Exactly for this reason, because women understand that the stakes are generally far to high for most men if they were to leave. Even if her and hubby do get a divorce, no harm no foul because she’ll be finely compensated for her time by daddy government. Hopefully you’ve learned your lesson and don’t repeat your mistakes. Good luck.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Because he has a child, and doesn't want to lose half his shit before at least trying to fix her.

[–]bowhunter60 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

All options must be on the table.

Really hard to dig out of a hole this deep, though. Damn near impossible, and not worth the effort.

[–]Zealous_One1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Im afraid not. You will face endless shit tests and her trying to shame you and put you down in "your place". Because she has it formed in her mind, an idea that you have certain place, that there is a certain mold for you and she will forever try to put you back in it. You will need start fresh to be percieved differently.

[–]RP_COGuy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I won't try to rehash what others have said. In some ways, yes, your wife is shitty to you because you've let her get away with it in the past. Having said that, it is NEVER EVER okay to badmouth your kid's other parent to them. As far as the course of action, it really depends on the entire situation. Is she constantly berating you? Does she regularly badmouth you to your kid? Was this a one time thing because she was so pissed at you about something? All these factors will influence what the best course of action is.
IMO, if it was just being a bitch to you, I might consider going through the process of improving yourself and start dread leading up to the main event as described over in married red pill. But badmouthing you to your kid is a different realm and takes it to a different level. That's essentially emotionally abusing your kid. That would push me to immediately talking to a divorce lawyer and find out what you should do to document her shit what your recourse is, etc. But as I said, that's my opinion without knowing the rest of the story.

[–]HurricaneHugues1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why do you put up with it? Divorce her and go work on yourself. You're not doing your kids any favors by staying with your wife. It's not like there's even any real love between you two, and the negative energy permeates the air in the house. I grew up in a house where my parents didn't separate because of me. There was no love bewtween them and it really wasn't great for me at all. I could feel it. It gave me lots of anxiety as a kid.

[–]omega_dawg932 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

oh boy... you're in for some good comments.

i'll start with this one: "her behavior towards YOU is YOUR fault." period. the end.

your woman follows YOUR lead, and if she's operating like this while you're protecting & providing, it's your fault and your problem to fix.

"will she ever treat me properly?" are you fucking serious? she should WANT to treat you properly OUT OF RESPECT as her hubby, but we're past that point... you're in a very deep hole.

good luck... or good divorce.

[–]SigmaTalks0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Leave! Create a little distance and start a new life!

[–]frankgold0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"will I ever not have to deal with this crap?"

Only if you divorce her. IMHO there is no easy answer.

[–]OrzhovPalatine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's harder when you're married to my understanding.

She's use to your shit so you have to check her harder. Looks like your issue is that you've only recently become red pill aware and now trying to turn things around. Will take some time to "train up" your wife if she was accustomed to you a certain way

[–]nicyhasreddit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Think about where YOU have gone wrong.

And if you cannot find any, think again. You did do something wrong.

And if you change your ways to be more rp and she still does it, gtfo

[–]Bing_Bang_Bam0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

File first. File hard. Don't move out until divorce is finalized.

[–]Brushyourteethm8-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are not to BLAME for the situation that you are in as you have been following a shitty roadmap for years that you have been conditioned to follow. "Happy wife, happy life" BS. Read NMMNG (or better in my opinion, listen to the audiobook) - work on your own Nice Guy habits along with learning intersexual dynamics (read/listen to Rational Male).

You are now however, very much RESPONSIBLE for the relationship that you have with her - even more so as you have a kid. You are not a victim and it is now time to crack on - you have tough times and a steep learning curve ahead of you.

Become passionate about improving yourself physically and mentally. It is this drive that she will become attracted to again (she now resents and loathes the weak, husk of a man that she has found you to be and is acting out in anger and desperation).

It's a hard road ahead but you have stumbled upon the tools and the manual that you need to become better.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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