Red Pill and Purple Pill men: Were any of you objectively good looking/attractive, and STILL failing in the SMP/RMP because of using bluepill advice/upholding BP beliefs?

exit_sandman · 2015-12-08T01:03:48+00:00

Attractive enough. Not "ZOMG model"-like attractive, but far from unfuckable or undatable. My problem? Well, I've told them over and over again but I guess the most relevant summaries for a dating context can be found here and here.
My successes didn't come specifically from applying redpill advice, but kicked in earlier (I can't even say that I looked better at that point than years before). But had I been exposed to redpill-compatible ideas instead of their opposite during my formative years, I could have brought my dating life on the proper trajectory - far earlier.

prodigy2throw · 2015-12-08T01:08:13+00:00

I actually started becoming more attractive about a year before finding trp (lifting, style, hygiene). During this time I met quite a few women from tinder and online dating.

The thing is, I was not able to get passed the first date. Every single woman I went out with would not even respond to a text after first meeting. And I played everything by the blue pill book. Nice dinner, paid by me, took interest in their hobbies, complimented them, etc.

As soon as I stopped giving a fuck and used what I read on trp, I lost my virginity within two months. All this take interest and be nice shit is all garbage. If you want a fat ugly whale feminist then go for it. If you wanna get balls deep in some real pussy then you gotta treat a hoe like a hoe.

I'm living proof that these hoes don't know wtf they want.

I'm a straight up 5'10 brown sex symbol now.

DrunkGirl69 · 2015-12-08T02:12:39+00:00

My biggest problem in my younger years was I never asked women out.. To this day I have no idea if I was scared or just simply lazy..

I only dated 4 girls while in college, and every single one of them asked me out, made an effort to spend time with me, and pretty much held the entire relationship together.

Come to think of it, that's pretty much the story of my entire dating life. I've always preferred to live alone. I may be a true natural mgtow. My grandma remained single and lived alone for almost 40 years after grandpa died, so it may be a family thing

Sepean · 2015-12-08T09:42:25+00:00

Before the red pill I had 5 years of dead bedroom in my marriage, pretty much from the time our first child was born. It had detoriated a bit before that too though, but nowhere near as bad as it became.

I'm fairly good looking, I lifted seriously and practiced MMA, dressed well, I'm intelligent, did good with my career (I earned over $100k per year and had a potential huge upside and ~100 people under me). I also listened to what she said, did her many favors, spent lots of time with the kids.

Our marriage still went down the drain and we had sex around once every two months and she looked either bored or disgusted during it. Outside of the bedroom she was often bitching and when we fought she'd show so much contempt, roll her eyes, say really demeaning stuff.

I tried everything; read about how to communicate and tried to get her to read them, couple's therapy and sappy intimacy exercises, bought her gifts, I asked her what she wanted and I gave her that.

Nothing worked. Things actually became as I began trying to fix our marriage; I thought it was just the marriage getting worse but probably it was all the shitty I was following that was causing it.

We were just about to get a divorce when I found the red pill.

did you start using amused mastery? Did you agree+amplify? Did you use nuclear dread? Did you start assuming that your wife had the mentality and responsibility levels of a teenager? Did you stop being vulnerable to her/sharing your problems+feelings with her? Did you start using the 48 Laws of Power in your daily life?

Yes to all of those. I also began dominating. I didn't listen to what she said anymore, I just made the decisions. I began practicing day game and flirting with strangers, and my wife learned of some of it.

Pretty much the only thing that changed in the beginning was the behavioral advice of TRP. I did change my haircut to a more bold fauxhawk though.

I also cut way back on gaming, social media and porn in the beginning. I had tried that before with no luck though, and I've since reintroduced that without any ill effects, so I'm sure that was not a significant factor.

The TRP stuff worked like a charm. The effect was almost instantaneous; we began having sex again regularly and she was into it. I think around 2 months in we passed the main event and things turned around even more.

She's rarely angry at me. In general she's very sweet and affectionate. Lots of kisses, lots of her lying up against me. She gets annoyed at me now if we don't have sex at least every other day. Sex is super kinky and she is up for anything - collars, princess plugs, slutty lingerie, etc. During the day at any time I can take out my dick and she'll suck it (obviously not when there's people around or she's late for work, but you get the idea).

I was at 16-17% body fat before TRP and the first 3 months or so. She always said she preferred me at that and she didn't want me any leaner. After a while I decided I wanted to get my abs out and over the following 4 months I dropped down to 11-12%. I'd say I had 70-80% of the attraction I do now back when I began the cut, so it has gotten better as I got more ripped but I also improved my dominance/frame/cockiness etc. during that time. I'm sure there was an effect, but it was minor.

It is by far the social behavior of TRP that is the most effective. I'm very open to the idea that an unfit man wouldn't have been able to get as far as I did withing getting in shape first, but just following the general non-TRP self improvement advice will not get you anywhere. Especially the non-TRP behavior advice (listen, communicate, be helpful, be respectful) is complete bullshit.

AmericanHistoryAFBB · 2015-12-08T01:08:11+00:00

I wasn't supermodel attractive but I was attractive enough. Handsome.

What held me back was my constant habit of putting women's feelings before my own.

[deleted] · 2015-12-08T07:40:44+00:00

It takes a long time to get rid of the BP pedastalizing we unconsciously do and never realized. It took me...maybe a year before I cut that shit out.

alreadyredschool · 2015-12-08T09:08:17+00:00

I want the stories of men who did everything that the self-improvement advice mentions you should do-work out, dress well etc.-but still totally sucked with women, because they were nice, respectful, friendly, and not misogynistic.

Yes, some overweight women showed interest in me but that was it. It took time until I found out just how many compliments were spoke out behind my back. But somehow I wasn't any girls type.

i) Being completely ignored by women.
ii) Being rejected on every approach

Haha wife/date, maybe if I lowered my standards. Yes, ignored and rejected.

e.g. did you start using amused mastery? Did you agree+amplify? Did you use dread? Did you start assuming that your wife had the mentality and responsibility levels of a teenager?

Yes, I also started with rational egoism and awalt.

This is important: I want as few of the original part 1 variables not directly sourced from redpill or PUA to change as possible in part 2.

Exactly my bf didn't change at all. My wardrobe actually got worse and my hair cut stayed the same.

[deleted] · 2015-12-08T15:52:03+00:00

Ditto to u/exit_sandman, u/sepean and u/prodigy2throw and u/protopill. Bluepill relationship advice is completely and totally useless for men.

I was attractive enough to get at least some interest from average girls. Like sandman I wasn't model like attractive but girls weren't embarrassed to be seen in public with me. I dressed well and kept my weight down. My problems were introversion and listening to BluePill advice:

--just be nice

--just be yourself

--the right girl will come along someday. All you have to do is wait (and wait and wait and wait...)

--girls don't really care about looks; what makes them wet are intelligence, a good sense of humor, and men who do whatever the girl wants and gives the girl whatever she wants

--never ever go for what you want. You must give her what she wants FIRST and THEN she will give you what you want.

I frequently could not get past date 2. Whenever I pointed this out, I was always told I was not nice enough and that I needed to be nicer.

I got married and 15 years in was on the verge of divorce. Not a dead bedroom, but was being constantly disrespected and shit on. I found Roissy in 2011, before The Red Pill. A couple of months later, I told Mrs Pem: "Enough. You treat me with disrespect again and we're done. If you're unhappy with me, then let's get divorced and you can be happy without me."

I literally stopped giving a shit right then and there. I stopped caring about my wife, stopped caring about her feelings, and took what she said much less seriously.

My marriage changed literally overnight. I got more sex. The disrespect stopped immediately. She stopped treating me poorly and started treating me much better. Basically it was nuclear dread - I was truly ready to end things if they didn't improve immediately. It was also caring about myself much, much more, and not taking everything Mrs. Pem said so seriously.

Blue Pill doesn't work. Believe me - I've tried it. For a couple of decades. Doesn't work at all.

cocaine_face · 2015-12-11T15:57:19+00:00

Well, I don't know how attractive I am (I'm not tall. I'm relatively fit, but not visibly "muscular"), but I certainly noticed a massive, massive difference going from being non-Redpill, to being Redpill.

I went from long dry spells, and very ugly girls (including one year long dry spell that was ended by me hooking up with a 300 lb 35 year old when I was 24ish), to dating relatively fit, younger women (anywhere between 2-10 years older than me so far).

I would say it has had an unparalleled positive effect on my dating life, and increased the attractiveness of girls I'm involved with, and the frequency with which I have sex.

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