Having read some of the recent posts from @red-sfpplus I started to write a response but I think it’s more of a stand alone post as I worked on the second half. So here it is a Ds game you can use as inspiration with some background on why it works.

I came up with a game called “Choose Your Hole”.

The rules are simple.

  1. There is going to be a night, evening, afternoon or whatever where she chooses what hole she’s gonna get fucked in.
  2. I’m going to only insert into one of her three holes (mouth, pussy or ass).
  3. She will choose the hole but not know which she is choosing. I came up with three random multiple choice questions: choose a number: 3, 8 or 7 next choose a colour: red, yellow or green and finally choose a letter: J, D or S.

Here is the key I did not share with her: 3 - ass 8 - mouth 7 - pussy

Red - mouth Yellow - pussy Green - ass

J - pussy D - mouth S - ass

  1. I texted her one question at the end of the day for three days in a row. On day 4 I showed her the key and what she chose, in this case it came out as ass.
  2. When informing her of her prize I told her my expectations of preparation. IE clean herself, wear thigh high stockings etc and we agreed on a date. I also keep it open for her to put forward any limits or requests she has. I also told her if she is a good girl and pleases me I’ll work her clit. She will be expected to use her mouth and hands but I won’t be putting anything IN her mouth such as my dick or fingers.

That’s basically the game. You can modify it however you like based on the dynamics of your relationship.

If the above has peaked your interest then read on cause from here on lies the important stuff:

  1. We have and openly discussed Ds relationship where she trusts me and I know how to read her limits. Ours is not TPE as I do not like the idea of TPE. (If you don’t know what Ds or TPE stand for you have some research to do and no, pornhub is not a good source of info) we have safe words established...
  2. We rarely fuck for less than 45 mins to an hour. So it’s understood this will be a full on working of that hole.
  3. I use all three of her holes on the regular, so she’s fully capable of taking an extended session in any one of those holes.
  4. Did I mention trust? She trusts I’m not gonna over do it, or more to the point that I’m paying enough attention to her that I’m not going to “cross her lines”. She knows I’m going to take care of her before, during and after even though I’m definitely going to use her roughly and she’ll love it.
  5. Aftercare, when this is over as with nearly every time we fuck I’m gonna hold her, tell he she’s a good girl and deliver a high level of comfort. Dichotomy is key. The more we explore one extreme, the more it’s gonna get balanced with the opposite. I’ll make sure aftercare lasts until we’re both fully wound down and want to shower.
  6. The above will in no way “fix” a dead bedroom.
  7. We’re already at the stage we’re she vocalizes she is my property sexually.
  8. I’ve done a shit ton of reading, learning and practice to get to this point.
  9. I’ve read the book Sex God Method and incorporated a lot of the points in it before I explored Ds or BDSM type play with a LTR.
  10. I personally have a shit ton of work I need to continue to do to grow as a high value man, it took me about two years to get to the point where I can pull off the above confidently. I still make mistakes and I correct myself as best I can whenever I can. This shit is a marathon not a race, maybe a game like the above could be considered a milestone in the high value man journey. At this point for me it’s just another fun thing I do with my girl. Properly unfucking oneself takes a long time and it never ends.

One final word on MRPs wanting to explore kink, BDSM, Ds etc. You’re gonna run across a lot of post modern progressive BS just like everywhere else in the western world. Your gonna need to be wise and know where to draw your own personal boundaries. It’s pretty easy to get lost in it.

Some questions you’re going to face on that path: - Do I want an open relationship? - Where do I draw the line when it comes to freaky shit? - Am I trustworthy? - Where is my spouse in all of this? - Am I strong enough and attractive enough that my partner is going to follow my lead once exposed? - Do I know the risks and am I willing to accept the worst case scenario?

If you’re new to MRP, just starting the 12 steps of dread haven’t read any of the MRP material, suffer from a dead bedroom etc this may not be something you should look into. In the end you are the only one responsible for what happens on your life.

I have friends who were a couple that I’ve known for almost 25 years. They have 6 kids. They started exploring the kink world from a naive place. Short story he failed to draw boundaries, lead and maintain perspective. That said he had a great time as did she. In the end they were exploring “ethical non-monogamy”, jealousy took over and he pulled back from the “kink community” but she kept going. The fiery spiral that was their split became fairly public with her posting all kinds or insane shit on Facebook. He had a decently successful business with a family focussed market, that market politely stopped using his services. He became an addictions counsellor, she became a homeless mermaid witch and their kids are trapped in a total mess between the two parents. They take turns living in their house. She couch surfs when not in the house and he a shitty apartment...

I think about them a lot when I think about kink. Did kinky sex kill their family? No, his total lack of perspective, boundaries, awareness of the risks etc...

If anyone wants to know more about BDSM or a Ds relationship dynamic feel free to ask.