Hi.

So, I think yesterday someone shared a post from this sub with me and sent me a question, asking my opinion about this subreddit. I have my own sub, that's the reason I have people who ask me questions daily about mind and life in general.

The person asked me "Is it true that when you become vulnerable women will no longer be attracted to you or love you?" And he shared a post from here that promotes that idea. I will give you my answer but I have to tell you that that post and that question made me very curious about this sub and everything it was about.

The more I read the posts of this sub the more I realized how men of this subreddit suffer from "nocebo effect" or self "fulfilling prophecies". And I don't say that to be mean or agressive in any way. In fact I take the time because I have compassion for you all and I hope that this post will give you food for thought.

I will give you now my opinion and I ask you as a brother to think about it deeply and seriously. It is my conviction that if you understand what I say here you will be free from your self imposed hell with relationships and women.

First of all my answer to the question that the person asked me. "Is it true that when you become vulnerable women will no longer be attracted to you or love you?"
It depends of your beliefs. If you are convinced that to be loved and attractive you have to be cold and distant and have multiple women at the same time then you make it your reality. And you will find people who have the same beliefs and the same reality. No one can deny that.
But If you're a true thinker and seeker of truth you have to be honest and see all the happy married men who don't cheat and are quite vulnerable with their partner. And are still very much loved. In fact that's the only way to have a true love, a true love mariage. It is not by playing games or having beliefs such as "I have to be fake or make myself something I am not to be loved". If you look the depth of that belief you will see a very low self image or even self hate and self pity. This is not the way.

Now, it is true that FEAR or fear based thinking leads you to weakness, depression, suffering and loss of attraction and loss of partners. This applies to women as well as men. If you are afraid of not being good enough, if you constantly imagine someone cheating or leaving you then you harm yourself and you create a realty that fits that mind and that position. So if you are "vulnerable" because of constant feeding of fear then YES. You will be left or rejected. It is not attractive. But this applies to men and women. Its not a men vs women thing.

MY MESSAGE:

This is the ultimate truth you are seeking: YOUR BELIEFS MAKE YOUR REALITY.
You are programming yourself into programs of thinking and behaving that make your hell. So the first step is to recognize those beliefs. Of course to you they are truth and reality because that is the nature of beliefs. But still you have to be open about questioning them. As said earlier, if you are convinced that you have to be fit, act like an "alpha" and be constantly busy or whatever to be loved then it will be your reality. But this is not the reality you want. You want to be loved for being true and authentic. You want to be yourself and even vulnerable sometimes. So you have two options: Keep your old limiting beliefs and act according to them and make strategies that fit those beliefs OR you change your beliefs and give up on strategies that no longer make sense. Ultimately you will see that your way of thinking and strategy making is ruled by FEAR, so is your perception of women.

Let's take my example. I believe that I am loved like a living god in my relationship. I don't believe in any strategy of seduction, manipulation, games playing or whatever. So I can express my feelings to my girlfriend, I can be vulnerable, I don't play any games, I don't try to manipulate her etc. I do nothing most of the posts from this sub promote. YET I LIVE THE PERFECT LOVE AND MY GIRLFRIEND SEES ME AS A GOD. Not only my girlfriend but I'm very popular as well.

Why do you think is this so? How does it apply to all of those posts and probably your beliefs? The difference is that I KNOW I AM LOVED FOR BEING MYSELF. And I act out of trust and confidence. Not out of fear. Everything you do out of fear is bound to fail. If I had fear I would probably think and feel the way you do. I would need strategies, programs, workouts, theories that confirm my fear and that work based on that fear... ALL OF THOSE END WHEN YOU ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE WORTHY OF LOVE AND WORTHY OF A LOVE RELATIONSHIP FOR THE WAY YOU ARE.

All manipulations, strategies, mind games have their end. You cannot be fit forever, you cannot be strong forever, you cannot be young or beautiful forever, you cannot be constantly busy and pretending you're something you are not. I mean ultimately you can but why would you make love and attraction limited to that? It is better to begin to understand the power of your mind and your beliefs and start building beliefs and reality that serve you. YOU CAN BE LOVED LIKE A GOD NO MATTER HOW YOU LOOK, YOUR AGE, POSITION, HEALTH OR WHATEVER. TRY IT.

The more you think of this message and this truth the more you will loosen your old negative convictions and the more you will start to see evidences that confirm what I told you, because again that is the nature of reality. Your mind creates your reality and I don't mean this symbolically.

I am open for questions.
PS: sorry for the FLAIR: i am not sure if it's the right one for this post.