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[–]redpillfil18 points19 points20 points 11 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
I told her I was seeing other women. The truth is, I wasn't, not at the time, but she didn't need to know that.
I said this to my plate last night when she asked if there were other girls in my life. She lives with her bf and has a child with him. Which made me go "wtf" when she had the nerve to tell me to stop seeing other girls and wanted to be my only one. How you going to say that while cheating on your bf?
OP, what did you plate say when you told her you're seeing other girls?
[–]southernmost17 points18 points19 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You appear to be sticking your dick in crazy.
[–]JeanValjean197o 24 points25 points26 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
We all are. It's just that some are crazier than others.
[–]Fulp_Piction4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
True that. You'll also notice that they're completely sane until you LTR them. Next thing you know her emotional state has the stability of a house of cards in a hurricane, she has anxiety, bipolar disorder, and borderline personality disorder and it's your job to fix it all. Bitch please.
[–]Crotch_Snorkel7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I had a married plate do the same thing. Only she did it more passive aggressively as in "I don't think I can handle the thought of you being with other women, so I don't think we should talk anymore."... so I said "if that's how you feel, I think you're right."... Turns out she was bluffing.
[–]redpillfil2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Did she give you anymore shit about you seeing other women afterwards?
[–]Crotch_Snorkel1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Basically we stopped talking for about a month, she defriended me on FB "Because it's too hard to see you on there" but in a month she was texting me again. She lives out of state so when we see each other it requires air travel, and even with all the hurdles of that, she goes well out of her way to come see me... gives no shit anymore, but she probably will in the future, but considering her situation I just kind of laugh when she tells me she gets jealous because its so blatantly hypocritical.
[–]antariusz24 points25 points26 points 11 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link
Congratulations on getting comfort tested. You failed the comfort test, but women only comfort test a man after he has done an excellent job of passing all of her shit tests, and she legitimately fears losing your provisioning.
Comfort tests are hard to fail, you pretty much have to do it intentionally. But when you do fail them, the relationship is effectively over, she'll be having sex with another man within a week. You might get a text from her in a month as she seeks validation, most likely after her new friend pumps and dumps her, and her hormones tell her she failed at securing a child and a mate.
[–]IronMeltsinmyHands4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
I want to believe you, but I don't know much about comfort tests. Could you elaborate more?
[–]bobbybluepill20 points21 points22 points 11 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
You'll encounter two types of tests...
The Shit Test is designed to allow a woman to see if she can break your frame and rapport. If she can, she knows that she holds power over you and is subsequently less attracted.
The Comfort Test is designed to allow a woman to see if there's any chance for a future with the two of you. This happens after you've destroyed a good deal of Shit Tests. She's discovered that she's ineffective at breaking your frame and controlling you. This makes her attracted to you but she'll begin to doubt herself. She'll think, "If he's this attractive, he has other options, and I'm probably not the best he can get. He'll leave me as soon as something better comes along." So, it's up to you to comfort her fears. You're not being an emotional tampon, because you're controlling the validation that she receives.
There are a lot of different ways that you could have dealt with this. Me? I like GoodLookingLoser's method where you tell the girl you're disappointed that she brought this up, because everything was going so well. You're totally open to being in a relationship with the right girl, but you want things to progress naturally. In the past, when titles and rules came into play, it messed things up. You don't want to mess anything up so you just want to see how it goes for a few months.
You should search this subreddit for "comfort test" and read up on it.
[–]Syriz_ 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
Okay wow. I had never heard of comfort tests before. Most likely because I am relatively new and working on myself these days (4 months and counting). I dont think it will be of use to me anytime soon as I still am learning how to pass shit tests but still its good to know.
[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Be wary of "passing" so-called comfort tests. If you consistently respond with kindness and appeasement, she will weaponize her tears and comfort test your ass right into marriage lockdown.
It doesn't look and feel like warfare, but it is. It's in her nature to probe for any vulnerability, looking for a profitable angle of attack.
[–]bobbybluepill3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I've thought about this too. I try to keep strict with the following rules for plates:
Ultimately, you've got a decision to make. If you follow my rules, your plate will eventually drop. If you want an LTR, you're going to have to see her more than once a week eventually and you're going to have to pass more and more Comfort Tests.
If she begins weaponizing her tears, I think you need to make it known that you won't be manipulated and go No Contact for a few days. If it continues, you should just Next her.
[–]GarandTheftAvto0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Can you expound on benefits/risks of only seeing a plate twice in a ten day period?
I have a relatively new plate I've been seeing way more than that- not to the exclusion of my main plate or random pick ups I try during my downtime though.
If everything is going well, e.g., plenty of sex and you're passing shit tests and still have abundance mentality, why should one artificially ration the attention/time spent with the plate?
[–]f04ee231826c6c00 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
In a 31 day period I would see one for 16, one for 8, one for 4, one for 2, and one for 1. I think that would be ideal.
[–]Smooovies2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I find it weird that guys don't see this. Granted, I've been more prone to accurately categorizing women's behavior after TRP. At this point, I see nearly everything women do with us as a way of gaining power. Passing "Tests" is our first line of defense against their tactics.
[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
weird that guys don't see this.
True. Fish can't see the water. Ego and sexual drive makes us extremely vulnerable to honeypotting. But that's the point of reproductive biology. We're wired this way to be effectively used by women; willingly enslaving ourselves just to get access to poon.
[–]voomer532 points3 points4 points 11 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
We're wired this way to be effectively used by women
I think you're onto something here..kind of a built-in hypnotic subroutine in the presence of someone we're attracted to...
[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
All humans respond to status cues. Women are vulnerable to our charms too :)
[–]voomer532 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As usual I have to slap myself to remember it works in reverse, just differently...good point.
[–]Tqbfjotlds 5 points5 points5 points 11 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
"Shit tests" are a woman's way of trying to break you through negative remarks, intimidation and passive bullying.
When that does not work aka you pass these shit tests. She tries comfort tests, which are her way of breaking you down through acting vulnerable and emotional. This triggers the protective instinct in men.
The end game is the same - you have resources that she wants and she is trying whatever she can to get you to commit those resources to her.
Women play this game 24x7x365. There is never a moment when you are speaking to any woman, when she is not thinking about what she can get from you and how to manipulate you into giving her your time/resources for free.
[–]Endorsed ContributorAFPJ0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link
thinking about what she can get from you and how to manipulate you
I'm convinced they seldom actually think about it - seems to be more of an innate hind-brain function.
[–]HeadingRed1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Its a new relationship (you are intimate now, the early days were a different dynamic) so she is seeing if this will be more than just casual sex. You gave her friendship in the past - she is seeing if she can still get that. So-
Say no and she may fade\seek others.
Say yes and you could be a couple - but be wary of passing all comfort tests 100% of the time. You still need to occasionally remind her that you have options and she needs to earn you. A great counterweight to this is social proof - when in public work to court the attention of other women. This works like magic.
[–]moosevice_dot_com 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The problem with getting to the comfort test stage is that I start to resent the girl after all her prior shit tests on me. Especially if the shit tests are threats of breaking up. When she gets to ask me "if we are exclusive" I want to leave her behind for being such a cunt before.
[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Totally agree with this... you "pass" all the shit tests and end up hating and resenting her for her bullshit.
[–]moosevice_dot_com 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yes and now I don't like her enough to commit to her (LTR only, never marry).
It's a lose-lose situation women put themselves in because they over shit-test instead of giving her new man some fucking faith based on good judgment but I guess some bitches are just too crazy to stop the shit-tests or they get off on it. Fuck I want a sexbot for Xmas.
[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Conversely... maybe they just aren't that attracted. They shit test to hell, it sort of works, but they aren't that interested. You date for a while, you think she's horrible.
Then along comes Brad Pitt and suddenly she's sweetness and light and all things lovely, and he doesn't end up hating her.
[–]Tres_10010 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
From the sounds of it, he has other plates anyways, and was no longer really into this one for anything besides fucking. Failing a comfort test doesn't matter when you truly don't care if she stays or goes.
[–]JeanValjean197o 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
"Don't be afraid to take the L. "
What is the "L"?
[–]bianhuahua 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Loss. Conversely, if someone says they got the "W," it means they won.
[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS-3 points-2 points-1 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
In some cities, it means, 'Take the eLevated railroad (away)'
[–]s0undwave 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How'd you escalate to sex in the first place? Nice work.
[–]windowkicker 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This just goes to show that you can blow the friend zone out of the water if you concentrate on your SMV enough.
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[–]redpillfil18 points19 points20 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]southernmost17 points18 points19 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]JeanValjean197o 24 points25 points26 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Fulp_Piction4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Crotch_Snorkel7 points8 points9 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]redpillfil2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Crotch_Snorkel1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]antariusz24 points25 points26 points (20 children) | Copy Link
[–]IronMeltsinmyHands4 points5 points6 points (14 children) | Copy Link
[–]bobbybluepill20 points21 points22 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]Syriz_ 2 points3 points4 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad11 points12 points13 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]bobbybluepill3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]GarandTheftAvto0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]f04ee231826c6c00 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Smooovies2 points3 points4 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad2 points3 points4 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]voomer532 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]voomer532 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Tqbfjotlds 5 points5 points5 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed ContributorAFPJ0 points1 point2 points [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HeadingRed1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]moosevice_dot_com 2 points3 points4 points (3 children) | Copy Link
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[–]moosevice_dot_com 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]JeanValjean197o 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS-3 points-2 points-1 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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