In April of 2017, my wife and I split up and are just now getting around to finalizing the divorce.

My wife is wanting retroactive(back pay), for the months I didn’t pay child support before I got the job I have now. Ok, fair enough. I didn’t get the job I have now until Oct 2018, which I have been paying her $1000 a month in child support since. So yes, I agree I do owe her for every month before Oct 2018.

However, the amount of retroactive she’s asking for is over $20k. She’s calculating that number as if I haven’t been paying since Oct 2018. I told her I would agree to the retroactive, but she has to deduct the months I already paid(7 months). $20k - 7k = $13k. She wasn’t having it. She said either I agree to the $20k or we will have to settle in court. I begged her to reconsider since I now live in a different state and would have to take off work, fly to her state, get a hotel, and rent a car just to appear. She said too bad and took me to court.

Court day comes and I explain my case to the judge. Not only does the judge agree that the months I already paid should be deducted, she also says I should only pay based on what I was earning before Oct 2018. Well most of that time I was unemployed so I wasn’t making anything. The few months I was working I was making a very small salary. The judge did her own calculation and determined I only owe a little over $800 in retroactive. I paid my ex the $800 on the spot and that was that.

My ex then calls me the day after court and asks if I could still give her my original offer of $13k. Ha!

EDIT: I might actually still give her the $13k, or at least part of it because it’s not my child’s fault that any of this happened. I don’t know what do you guys think?

EDIT 2: yikes this blew up! Don’t worry I’m not giving anymore than what the judge ordered. I am, however, putting that $13k in a college fund for my kid that only I have access to.