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[–]Dude556618 points19 points20 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is very good imo. I find I do better talking to women when my friends aren't around because I get self conscious if they are. Sometimes I think I'm more worried about my friends seeing me get rejected than the actual rejection.
[–]thegodofwar745 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good stuff. The last part about learning that nobody actually gives a fuck is very true. It is very freeing to understand the fact that you can do whatever you like, barred a few acts, and it won't have the slightest effect on your social standing. This builds confidence and it's very endearing.
[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Law 5: "So much depends on reputation - Guard it with your life."
Law 6: "Court attention at all cost".
The fact that Robert Greene put those two laws next to each other is not coincidental. The smart man will know the value both of reputation (status) and standing-out (attention). The smart man will know they are not mutually incompatible.
Equating "reputation" with "being a boring fuck who doesn't stand out" in order to support an argument for standing out is an obvious straw man. You can be a silly motherfucker and still have a reputation. Indeed that is your reputation.
By "guarding your reputation", Greene only means to act in such way that people don't think of you as a dishonest and shady character. He did not mean "don't approach women because that's bad reputation".
By all means approach women, be the one who stands out, and get people talking about you as "that fun weird guy who bothers women". As long as they don't see you as "that ungrateful guy who I wouldn't trust with my money/business", your "reputation" is safe.
[–]1Socialinception[S] 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And arguing that I implied reputation only means "being a boring fuck who doesn't stand out" is not only an obvious strawman but also a fallacy of composition.
I never said reputation only existed in one highly specific context. However, it is true that men don't approach women because they're afraid of damaging their reputation. It's not a rational fear, but it exists.
[–]JcHgvr1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
Even if you dance through the streets singing showtunes, people would, at most, find this bemusing. If a friend learned what you did, you could explain it was a joke or a social experiment and that would be that.
Isn't that a little self contradicting ? On one hand you say do your thing and not worry about others because they don't give a damn on the other you give an example of how to explain yourself. Least of all you should have to explain yourself to your friends.
Last I checked explaining yourself was not something you want to do. You say "Yes I did it", and when they ask why, my go to answer is "Because I can" or "Because I wanted to." whatever they say after than becomes irrelevant. It straight up establishes that their opinion on your action does not change anything.
[–]1Socialinception[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm saying that even if they did care a little bit for some reason, it's still not a big deal; and can easily be addressed.
[–]SOwED1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
The general message of this post is right, but you are mostly misusing the term "reputation."
Your reputation is not something that is affected by interactions with complete strangers that you never see again, assuming no one you will see again is around.
Your reputation absolutely exists, in a distinct form in the minds of every person you have had multiple interactions with.
So I'll say it again: this post isn't wrong, but the way it talks about reputation is.
[–]1Socialinception[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Many guys go out with friends watching them, and although they wouldn't admit it (even to themselves), they hold back because they don't want to get rejected in front of their friends. They're protecting their reputation. But in reality, even if they got rejected, their friends wouldn't care, if anything, they'd be a little jealous that someone was taking action.
[–]SOwED0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think that's more about protecting their ego. Opening with more girls (whether they get rejected or not) will affect their reputation because not everyone goes out to bars solely to pick up girls. Whether it's a good or bad effect depends on his friends, but you can't say reputation doesn't exist. I think a better way of putting it is "fuck your ego."
[–]Mudpielol0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I disagree to an extent. Your professional/work/business reputation matters.
[–]wasabichilifireworks0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Reputation doesn't matter in bars/clubs... but it does matter in the workplace. Especially if you are going to be at that particular place for a long time. You don't want to be labeled as the creep. Regardless of what you do after, it can be hard to shake whatever first impression you gave.
[–]NeoreactionSafe0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
To "protect" your reputation you need to have proven yourself as brave to begin with.
So all acts of courage enhance your reputation.
To be introverted and shy is to add shame to yourself... you are being unmasculine... beta.
No one wants the reputation of a dorky introverted shy kid with delicate feelings. Expose your courage.
[–]growthup points points points 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
48 Laws of Power: Law 6: court attention at all cost.
It's better to be hated then ignored. I always aim to build myself first and then worry about reputation after.
Reputation only maters when you are already on top and by then you normally have enough power & influence to spin most threats that come your way.
[–]NeoreactionSafe1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A masculine man who has already proven himself as a "man of action" need only preserve that image by not showing timidity in public.
Once your position is established all you have to do is "not be Beta".
[–]CrimsonShiv-2 points-1 points0 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Read up to
There is almost never any real social risk, yet we act like people will ostracize us
Bookmarked & saved as PDF,
Thank you Socialinception
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[–]Dude556618 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]thegodofwar745 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]1Socialinception[S] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]JcHgvr1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]1Socialinception[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SOwED1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]1Socialinception[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]SOwED0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Mudpielol0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]wasabichilifireworks0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]NeoreactionSafe0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]growthup points points points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]NeoreactionSafe1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CrimsonShiv-2 points-1 points0 points (0 children) | Copy Link