Feeling suicidal right now. Does it get better after a divorce?

Unthotful · 2019-04-21T03:55:30+00:00

It sucks at first. It gets sooo much better. Think of it as trying to break an addiction, because that's basically what you're going through. Hang in there.

Infinitewisdom1984 · 2019-04-21T04:08:10+00:00

She betrayed you. You killing yourself over her betrayal will make her feel really special - that she could be wanted that badly. What you must do is always put on a nonchalant attitude when you're around her, don't ever show her any sign that you're sad or upset. Act like she was a burden anyway. This takes her power away, and you will start to actually feel the way you're pretending to after some time.

Never, ever, ever contemplate suicide over a woman, especially. In a few months you will start to feel this rush of motivation, that your life is about to be renewed. Take this time to do whatever it takes to better yourself, make yourself better than you've ever been. Your ex will feel like shit once you're successful and happy without her, and you ultimately win this game. Look after yourself, you have your whole life ahead of you.

PHyL1X · 2019-04-21T04:24:07+00:00

“Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem”... hang in there.. it’s going to be a roller coaster but it WILL get better!!!

DevilDrives · 2019-04-21T04:35:38+00:00

It's always hard to see the bright side of a dark situation.

A home is where the heart is. Honestly, I would probably live in a van if I got divorced. It's a simple life with very little responsibility.

The economy is definitely not in a recession. It may have reached a plateau but it's still a solid labor market. You just gotta get out of your funk and value yourself a little more.

A door closed, but a window is opened.

gevorgter · 2019-04-21T04:27:52+00:00

Look at it this way, now it is all you. You have no one to blame. Pickup you hammer and start hammering. Yes, it will take time. As it took who knows how many years to drive yourself into the ditch. Just do not expect immediate result. The more you wait for result the bigger it will be.

Like going to the gym, if you get in a scale after 3 days you will not see any change and loose all motivation but go to the gym for 6 month and then get on a scale.

The theory is called "delayed gratification" and people who managed that art tend to be more successful in life.

dirtydog113 · 2019-04-21T05:05:04+00:00

Dude, I have been exactly where you are....and I know for sure it will get better from where you are now.The only way is up from here.

Start exercising immediately , walk , run , cycle, swim, lift , whatever you can and whenever you can ...even if its old milk bottles full of water on a broomstick.

What you choose to do is for you and you alone. If you let someone elses choices and actions have control over how you feel , over the things you do for yourself , you will always be walked on by others. Do you ...and start doing it now.

Jobs and money come and go , they are material things . Happiness is always where you find it ...and its always from within.

You will find a way .

strangerthing7 · 2019-04-21T06:49:57+00:00

The best revenge is to not only to survive, but to flourish, prosper and slowly becoming happier. Yes it will be difficult at first but you never let the bastards win.

lulz3r · 2019-04-21T05:02:08+00:00

Divorce was one of the most liberating experiences of my life. At the time it sucked, but I look back on it now and I’m glad it happened when it did and not later in life. Focus on building yourself up and pursue economic solvency, learn a trade, get an education, change careers, find what makes you happy and chase that dream.

2019-04-21T04:42:52+00:00

[deleted]

ink_on_my_face · 2019-04-21T08:10:02+00:00

I have been through this shit. Not divorce but a nasty break up. But I'll give you that classic advice.

Delete all social media. Make sure you don't hear a single news about your ex. You will see her highlight reel on social media and compare with your life and feel miserable.
Get a gym membership. You are already in pain. Get something good out of it. Nothing pulls you out of depression and suicidal tendencies faster than a fit body.
One positive aspect of a break up is, it is easy to make good habits during this time. We're men, godammit. You are more capable than you think. With no pressure and freedom, you will come out as a better person at the end.
Make new friends. Socialize.
Be humble and get a job. Any job to keep yourself fed and a roof overhead. Always look for new opportunities and higher salary. As men, you will be surprised how resourseful we are and don't realize. Your wife is gone, you don't need to earn too much. You will get by with the little you earn.

And always remember: it gets easier with time. Be patient.

KAOS313 · 2019-04-21T05:27:45+00:00

So I just wanted to let you know that some random guy on the net does not want you to do it! Pain is part of life but no matter how bad today is there will be a better day. There has got to be something to get you to want to stick around. From a movie to planning a trip or there has got to be something in this life you want to do. I looked in the comments and didn't see you respond so if you are thinking about hurting yourself you need to call someone. Just hold on for tonight at least. I have had people kill themselves in my life and I know that there is someone who cares about you and would be devastated if you left this world early. Don't you want to see Game of Thrones tomorrow? Be lame if you were a fan to miss the last few shows after 8 years. And look at a weekend how many people are reaching out!!! You matter and please don't do it.

BloodlessTurnip · 2019-04-21T07:22:38+00:00

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Don't think it, don't say it, don't plan for it, don't do it.

I've been betrayed by a cheating wife... and after a while the sun shines and you say to yourself: "What the hell was I thinking? That bitch never loved me, she only used me to get things she wanted. I'm glad that she's gone and I relish my freedom from having to put up with her shit."

It will pass and you will be happy again. Poorer, but happy.

TheBrokenSigil · 2019-04-21T09:17:15+00:00

every divorced man i have ever known spent few months in seriously depression and then a year in mild depression then they get a hobby or something and then works to build back up what they lost in the divorce. in about 3-5 years you will be back on track.

Belzebuthian · 2019-04-21T07:35:09+00:00

Can we as a community maybe help our fellow man out? A GoFundMe or something. We need a way to verify people of course since I would hate it if I see a YouTube video next week of a blue haired feminist bragging how she scammed us out of our money.

astuteglute · 2019-04-21T07:50:16+00:00

Paying off mine now. It gets many much more betterer

Tonyb33 · 2019-04-21T09:21:54+00:00

You have to reframe the problem. You were unhappy in your marriage correct? You are in employment and in receipt of an income. OK so you are going to lose your home that’s unfortunate. 1. You are shortly going to discover how little you need to live on and be happy, that will hold you in good stead for the rest of your life. 2. You are about to get rid of so much time consuming crap, this will leave you with clarity of thought and time on your hands. 3. Simply change the time into money investigate side incomes that you can use to generate wealth.

Older_Miggy · 2019-04-21T10:57:28+00:00

I just celebrated the 15th anniversary of my divorce.

The first couple years sucked, then things started to turn. I've had continuous challenges since then, but I'm still fighting. Haven't given up yet.

You'll be ok, you just need time.

s-e-x-m-a-c-h-i-n-e · 2019-04-21T12:13:35+00:00

If (5 years from now you) told you that you would be in a better financial/relationship/happy headspace you would not believe him at this moment but he’d be spot on.

My great grandfather told me when I was young, “money is like a whore...they’ll come and go just as quickly as each other”... “neither are worth worrying to hard, working to hard or dying for.” It was good advice.

Engeenius · 2019-04-21T11:10:11+00:00

I was married to a girl I've known since we were little. So many years of friendship and memories. I was betrayed by her. I was in a huge debt after divorce and I know how you feel. I went my own way, focused on my career and my debts are all payed off and I've never been happier. My health and fitness is much better too. Give it time, it will get better. Better than you've ever imagined.

Things you need to do to begin this journey:

Go your own way and don't even date. If you really want some pussy once in a while, get a hooker
Become a minimalist. Reduce all your expenses and living style.
If you need to move back in with your parents for a temporary period of time to save more money, do it. Then move out when you're comfortable
Share your thoughts. Good that you did that here at this sub. Keep sharing, people will help.
Give it time. As long as you are a mgtow, it gets better every year.

Best of luck brother.

Peppeperoni · 2019-04-21T05:21:07+00:00

Please don’t think about killing yourself. There are so many people that care about you, even if you don’t realize. Do some stuff for yourself to feel better. Take a trip do something fun! My messages are always open if you need to reach out

MattFoley79 · 2019-04-21T05:33:56+00:00

It sucks for a while, but eventually gets better. Were kids involved in the divorce? If not, that should help you out.

Barosane · 2019-04-21T06:08:02+00:00

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. All you have to do is to keep breathing man, no matter what. Just breathe and you will come out on the other end.

I would personally like to live a longer life with less money, than to die when I’m young with lots of money.

DongleNocker · 2019-04-21T07:05:46+00:00

It gets a little better every day. Just keep your head up and find a something to center yourself on. Be it exercise, learning something new, or creating something or all three.

GigamusPrime · 2019-04-21T07:48:58+00:00

Take it one day at a time, brother. Don’t give in to the feelings of despair, just handle it piece by piece.

Some days will be better. Some will not be, and may even feel worse, but know that it’ll fade and the easier days will be more numerous than those that aren’t.

You will get past this.

caribian · 2019-04-21T08:14:32+00:00

Dude! What you feel now is the last drops of twosome-toxins leaving your body! Soon you will start to experience life again! Hobbies will come back, old and new friends will resurface. You will have great times with your kids. You won’t have to worry about crazy woman shit. You can breath. You can relax. You can sleep like a baby knowing you left the competition. You can get a bike. You can get a two seater. Go travel! Go on small road trips during weekends. You can start a beer cellar. Take up cooking. Eat quality food. Sous vide everything! You now have time to exercise. You will be fit in no time. You can decorate your living space with the stuff that makes you feel good. You get to whack off whenever the fuck you like. You get to hook up whenever you like. Do silly shit. You get to choose! Living as a free man is fucking great! (You still get to fuck women if that is a concern of yours, just learn the rules before doing so).

veganhitler · 2019-04-21T08:50:05+00:00

Just hang in there bud. Its always darkest before the dawn.

blackierobinsun3 · 2019-04-21T09:31:21+00:00

Every storm will pass

Freefrombitches123 · 2019-04-21T10:16:12+00:00

Yeah you will bounce back

Cagalhoto2002 · 2019-04-21T11:21:12+00:00

It will get better. It always does no matter how shity life is.

Congratulations on your new found freedom. If the economy sucks move where it doesn't suck, or improve your professional skills.

Even though emotions are tricky, you should logicly realise that your happiness shouldn't depend on other people, specially women.

ClotaLota · 2019-04-21T11:54:06+00:00

Don't even think about killing yourself brother... you have so much to live for! Hang in there my dude and GYOW, be strong and you can live any life you want from now on... you are free! Fuck all "obligations" and ideologies of who you should be, do you from now on! Revenge in the form of a Glorious Ascension to true selfhood is there for the taking DO IT!

RedMeatTrinket · 2019-04-21T13:02:42+00:00

Indeed it does get better. It's hard to see that when you are in the middle of a divorce. Every interaction with an attorney and every trip to court was the hardest part for me. I'm better off now financially and emotionally than I was before the divorce started. It took 6 years and I really didn't think I'd recover that fast.

unblackmailable · 2019-04-21T13:27:25+00:00

The pain will pass, but let it exist for a while. Pushing the pain away will only make it worse. Embrace it as something that makes you stronger afterwards. It will for sure. And the money-thing, that's easier : you can always get more of that, one step at the time.

StartingOver095 · 2019-04-21T14:05:53+00:00

It sucks man. The feeling is like a pit and it's really strong. But it really does the grease and eventually go away with time. I was in a similar dark place but I'm so glad I came through it

Definitely don't kill yourself man. There's so much in this world. There's so much for you to do and experience.

I really recommend you start journaling or see a counselor to help get your thoughts out and help you process the tough situation you're in. Heck I did both.

If you ever do have a really down moment and start thinking that way. It's really worth giving these guys a call or a live chat just so you have a sounding board. They don't pressure you they just listen.

National suicide prevention hotline

Call 1-800-273-8255 Available 24 hours everyday

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/

And we're always here for you to bro.

roxon89 · 2019-04-21T14:36:30+00:00

Yes it does, my brother. Yes it does.

sardoonoomsy · 2019-04-21T15:17:20+00:00

My brother: we are simple primates on a spinning rock being dragged by a burning ball of gas which is hurtling through space into a black hole. Nothing matters enough for you to end your own existence. Live your life my brother

Original_Username7 · 2019-04-21T15:32:31+00:00

Just hang on OP, hang on by your fingernails. That’s your only job right now, is to keep going, one moment at a time. It won’t get better overnight, but it WILL get better. Take care of yourself, rediscover yourself, learn to love yourself. It’s okay if you fall down to your lowest level ever for a while, because you will come back way way stronger and more successful than before, and you will have discovered how strong and capable you are in the process. You can’t see it right now AT ALL, but she’s given you a gift. You will figure out your housing problem, and then you will figure out your work problem, and then you will figure out your financial problems, one at a time, and you will be so fucking proud of yourself over the shit you overcame, you will go on to accomplish things you never imagined you could. She/they tried to victimize you, but you are not a victim, and you will never be a victim, you are one who will overcome. You are about to discover how fucking awesome you are, which will be the biggest reward you’ll find in all this, even after you’ve found new success and happiness in all the other areas that seem insurmountable to you right now. Embrace the suck, you can do this you badass motherfucker. The rewards of your new life are waiting for you.

TheConsumateCracker · 2019-04-21T16:02:15+00:00

Don't try to do it by yourself. Find men you can meet with in person. Find people who have been divorced but are now thriving. Ask churches in your area if there is a Divorce Care group you can attend. I've been through that program twice. It is incredible.

lonewolfsigmamgtow · 2019-04-21T17:03:32+00:00

Exactly. You would not be the same individual 7 years later.

Young-and-Confused · 2019-04-21T18:00:00+00:00

Don’t know what you’re going through, but I’ll pray for you man. It’ll get better! Might be rough now, but everything always gets better if you try to make it better. Don’t give up :)

rjpseal · 2019-04-21T18:47:12+00:00

I was exactly where you are 3 years ago.

And yes, it does get better. And I got through it before I learned of MGTOW.

Now I would never go back to my old life. And my stress level is near zero.

I'm going to suggest to you to try something called EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique.
You can google it and find thousands of instructional videos.

Though it looks silly it's been proven in many studies to work. I'm talking about published, peer reviewed clinical studies.

And it works so quickly in many cases it seems too good to be true.

Please give it a look and a try. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Good luck to you brother.

FlyingSexistPig · 2019-04-21T19:35:56+00:00

I went through two years of asking myself why it had happened, when I got divorced. Then I discovered The Red Pill.

I realized that the divorce was entirely my fault. But that gave me peace. It wasn't just bad luck. It wasn't some thing that I didn't do or say. It was everything. I was in charge but I didn't take charge. The reason I was responsible was because I had the power.

I didn't lead her. I didn't make all the decisions I should have made. I gave her too much power, and that power made her insecure and unhappy. (That's not what everyone told me would happen!) She makes terrible decisions, and of course blamed the consequences of those decisions on me.

Since the divorce was my fault, that meant I could rely on myself to fix me; something nobody else could or should do.

It will get better. The power is within you. YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM. Just because someone tells you you have to do something does not mean you have to do it. If you're "not making enough" to pay child support and pay for a reasonable apartment, then pay 50% of your child support. If you're supposed to pay her alimony, just stop doing it, or pay only some of it. Stash your cash or put in an investment account that she doesn't know about. If you pay something every now and then, it'll keep the hounds at bay, and you'll be able to get by. If you make a good faith payment every once in a while, there will be no dire consequences, regardless of what the judge or anyone else claims.

They want you working, otherwise nobody gets anything.

sacandbaby · 2019-04-21T19:46:24+00:00

Been there my friend. In a real recession. Lots of jobs out there today. Good luck. Hang in there.

erbangermanberben82 · 2019-04-22T06:53:40+00:00

Yeah, this really, really, really sucks. You're not giving many details, but in general, many of us have been there.

One answer for the moment: Ride it out for a while. You can always kill yourself later--that's what I tell myself.

Beyond that, definitely recommend scrubbing social media, etc. Get ex as far out of your life as possible. Kids and/or alimony make that harder, but do what you can.

It's just going to take time. Years. But it can be done. You only have to face one day at a time.

ziggmuff · 2019-04-22T07:10:32+00:00

Move to Phoenix or Tempe Arizona. You get to leave the past behind, living is cheap, and you'll find a job in days.

unblackmailable · 2019-04-21T10:12:30+00:00

Well you FUCKED UP big time so it’s time face your actions like a real man.

Time to live through the storm

Title	Feeling suicidal right now. Does it get better after a divorce?
Author	throwdivorcesucks
Upvotes	130
Comments	53
Date	April 21, 2019 3:47 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/bfku7d/feeling_suicidal_right_now_does_it_get_better/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/feeling-suicidal-right-now-does-it-get-better.479160 https://theredarchive.com/post/479160

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