New to sub so please be gentle. I turned 25 and I am one of those people that basically did everything opposite the red pill and I fear it’s too late!

rare_bookcollector · 2020-04-17T20:30:37+00:00

Happy birthday!

1) 25 is still plenty young to find someone. If I were you, I’d make sure to surround myself with like-minded people (married couples your age IIRC loooooove to fix their single friends up!) although that’s not where I met my husband (see prior sentence) I met a lot of quality men on eharmony way back when and many of my girlfriends found their husbands there (in their mid-20s to early 30s).

2) you sound extremely self-aware and it’s a great sign that you’re taking accountability for your past.

3) it’s never too late to make different choices or change your path. This sub is a great place for info.

ETA: I’m a big reader (duh, see my handle) but I loved WHY MEN MARRY SOME WOMEN AND NOT OTHERS. Forget who wrote it.

rare_bookcollector · 2020-04-17T20:38:54+00:00

I was in your situation when I graduated college at 21. I'm 24 now and found TRP at 22.

It's not too late. Not at all. Looking 24 is not a bad thing. You're still young and great skincare, changing your diet and exercise will help you.

First piece of advice: Take some time to do a glow-up and become more feminine. I'd recommend watching the YouTubers Mrs. Midwest, Cynthia L. and School of Affluence. They have great videos on improving your appearance, wardrobe, etiquette. etc. Glowing up includes skincare, hair, make-up, grooming and hygiene. Become your absolute best self.

Second: internal glow-up, work on yourself and try to determine why you fell into bad relationships and hooking up. Depending on your situation it may be wise to invest in therapy. If you're religious or were religious growing up, maybe now is a good time to think about your faith again. Doing all this will help you become the best version of your internal self. Think about all the qualities you admire in other women who have what you want and aspire to develop those traits too.

Third: Learn how to be a homemaker. Whether or not you will choose to be a stay at home wife/mom one day, it's very useful (plus men love it) when you know how to cook, bake, keep things neat etc.

Fourth: when you're ready to date, develop your standards and stick with them. For example: If a man wants to be intimate before you're ready (whether to you that a committed relationship, marriage, engagement whatever) and either ghosts you or gets annoyed, RUN. Also try dating more conservative-minded men. They will value femininity more than left-wing men.

Also: if you're concerned about your reputation, try dating strangers. It might sound weird, but I promise you it's so helpful. I always lived in fear that any reputation I might have would interfere with dating so I tried branching out, used dating apps to find potential partners who wouldn't know mutual friends/acquaintances. But, if your past (which you don't need to disclose the details of if you don't want to) bothers them, then he isn't the right man for you. It's not the mistakes that make a person, it's if you learned and improved from them that counts.

Okay, Ted Talk over. Hope this helps. Feel free to DM if you want. :)

rosebyanyothername1 · 2020-04-17T23:33:57+00:00

I made lots of mistakes and didn't find TRP until I was 30. Happily married now! there is still time.

My advice is to really learn how to look great -- clothes, makeup, color analysis, hair, nails. Learn your own beauty recipe that works for you, that's in your budget and that you have the time to do. Use YouTube. Mrs. Midwest has tips. It sounds superficial, but it's a big part of the job of being a woman to a great guy.

lovemylilfamily · 2020-04-17T20:45:56+00:00

“The Wall” might be a real thing but, in my opinion, most good men(future captains) who are looking to get married tend to be willing to look past some physical things as long as you bring something else to the table like a steady income or willingness to raise a family. I’ve seen it espoused on here multiple times, it’s not just about looks: A 3 can be a fantastic first mate and a 10 can be a ball-busting shrew. I would say worry less about “The Wall” and more about personal enrichment. Welcome to the sub! I think you will find a very supportive community here. I sure have!

DunboyCastleInTheSky · 2020-04-17T20:31:43+00:00

Don’t listen to that hateful comment judging you. While you did some things you should be ashamed of when you were younger, it seems like you’ve accepted responsibility and are seeking to make a positive change which is the most important thing. Welcome to the sub! I’m out running errands and will add recommendations later!

teeserzay · 2020-04-17T21:16:03+00:00

Watch Sheraseven on YouTube, she educated me.

i_cri_evry_tim · 2020-04-18T08:18:14+00:00

I’m gonna leave the womanly advice for the women but know that it’s never too late.

I was lucky enough to grow up in a fairly redpill home but a close friend of mine was blue pilled well into his thirties. He started listening and is now one of the most redpill, stand up dudes you can find. Awesome man and a great husband, father and captain for his family.

I also know a woman who was everything but RPW when she was 29. She started taking care of herself and correcting course. Last I heard, you wouldn’t recognize her. Complete 180, utterly feminine, very discerning of who she dates.

I know that “keep a low n-count, marry young to a good man” is the RPW ideal but, as some have said, it’s not your mistakes that define you but how you learn from them.

Best of luck.

Knnchwa1 · 2020-04-20T15:29:28+00:00

25 is young! Also, “the wall” is not something you have no control over. For instance, I noticed in my late twenties that I wasn’t getting as much attention as I was used to. I got in amazing shape at 30 and, boom, I was back to getting the level of attention I got in my early twenties. (Though I should note that I’ve always looked several years younger.) If you’re concerned about your face not looking young, use sunscreen every day and, if you can afford it, use prescription retinoids. There are many services such as Curology that provide prescription skincare for something like $30 a month. Take gelatin, fish oil, and a high quality multivitamin. Viviscal is a supplement that will make your hair thicker if that’s a concern. Also, try to minimize drinking. All of these combined should shave a couple of years off of your appearance. If it’s your body that’s your concern, find some fitness that works for you, and try to do resistance training twice a week to keep everything tight. Dry brushing will help keep your skin taut. Honestly, I envy you. I wish I’d discovered this stuff at your age. It doesn’t matter how young and attractive you are, if you don’t have the interpersonal stuff down, you won’t hold onto a man. I cringe to think of all the men I turned off by being a know-it-all shrew. You, however, have the tools and time on your side. You’re going to do great!

Tweak48 · 2020-04-20T14:43:43+00:00

Your past is behind you, all your new SO needs to know is what you are now. "Don't ask don't tell" has worked great for wife and I for 38 years.
If they ask your body count, tell em "I'm not a virgin and I'm not not a slut. That's all you need to know".

2020-04-18T04:52:38+00:00

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