I have personally made this mistake quite a few times. I stayed in relationships with LVM because I knew that they loved me. And I still stand by the fact that they did/do love me. They wanted me to be happy, they wanted me to be well, they desperately wanted to be together with me. They had deeply unhealthy ways of expressing it, or other character flaws that made them LVM.

The fact of the matter is that it is entirely possible that the LVM you are/have been in relationships with do love you and even care about you. Love is an emotion - and everyone feels emotion. But it's in how they express it and in other aspects of their character that we can assess whether someone is HV or not.