Boyfriend's Family Seems Unsupportive of Our Dynamic?

est-la-lune · 2017-07-14T04:56:40+00:00

Honestly, I think telling them you're doing what your boyfriend says is provocative, especially when you know they're feminist as can be.

You're only going to win points with them by expressing your own empowerment, and even then, they may not recognize your form of empowerment as valid.

In that case, I'd let my SO know what happened, why it made me uncomfortable, and let him resolve the situation.

Boobear3 · 2017-07-14T05:55:38+00:00

Whether they are feminists or not, they are adult women that are older and more established in their personalities. Being older and "wiser", they are obviously not going to relate to a 19 year old girl who follows around her boyfriend. I think you should try to find common ground with them, even if it's some superficial topic. Don't talk about your "relationship dynamics" unless needed.

PumpkinSub · 2017-07-14T13:33:38+00:00

Hahaha I dream of being candid with some people when they ask me about my relationship. Definitely not with his family though. Talk about the independent things you are doing and play nice to their interests for a while. Eventually they will see you and if they are good people they won't care that you want to be a homemaker. Tell your girlfriends about your taken in hand relationship instead.

RubyWooToo · 2017-07-14T14:22:22+00:00

I'm RPW, and to be honest, if I were in their position, I would be aghast by that comment as well. Knowing what you do about his family, it seems like you were trying to get a reaction out of them.

Being "traditional" does not mean following your partner around doing whatever he says. It means that you two have different roles and responsibilities within the relationship. While you may ultimately defer to his judgement, you still voice your opinions and feelings, and if he's a good captain, he takes that into account.

Also, at 19 years old, you should still be trying to grow as a person and make your own way in the world. Even if you would like to be a stay-at-home Mom one day, you should still be willing and able to take care of yourself.

Don't use your relationship in order to cop out of becoming an adult.

pinkdrawings · 2017-07-16T07:16:23+00:00

Just let it go.

Hopefully they'll move on from it in the future. I get you were just making a joke, but it wasn't a funny joke to them. Even if you disagree with feminism and all of that - it just isn't a funny joke to them.

So I'd honestly just let it go and not mention that type of stuff around them (joking or not) to keep the peace. There is no reason for them to be involved in your dynamic that much. So just don't mention it. Don't mention you appreciate his guidance, that you're listening to what he says, etc.

When it comes to your home making word it as something that is for YOU.

"/I/ really want to be a homemaker. I think it'll make /ME/ happy."

Don't put it on him. Even if a part of it is on him - don't. Make it clear that it is something that you've ALWAYS dreamed of and it makes YOU happy.

If things actually get argumentative you can point out that feminism is about choices and one choice is to be a stay at home wife/mother and thats what makes you happy. If it really does get to that point just make it clear that you're happiest at home, you respect their decisions to be independent women (even if you don't), and reassure them that you're very happy.

paul-wizard · 2017-07-14T12:44:46+00:00

They don't like you because you have opposing world views that can not be reconciled.

WeCaredALot · 2017-07-14T21:19:47+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Boyfriend's Family Seems Unsupportive of Our Dynamic?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	10
Comments	20
Date	July 14, 2017 4:15 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/6n6utm/boyfriends_family_seems_unsupportive_of_our/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/boyfriends-family-seems-unsupportive-of-our.73103 https://theredarchive.com/post/73103

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