Sometimes, even if we share our trauma at the right time to what we thought was the right person, that person may have been acting right until you lowered your guard. Or you may have been seeing the red flags but because of your previous conditioning you ignored it or extended your kindness.

When I remember about my healing times, when I didn't share my trauma immediately with people, my life got better. Also, I wouldn't want to hear about your trauma when I barely know you or you complaining about life all the time. Why? Because you're depending on people to make you feel better or you haven't claimed the responsibility within yourself to handle those emotions and take action in changing them.

I've been meeting a few HV girls, some younger than me and the common thing they share is that they've all done stupid things when they were young and they don't deal with people they don't vibe with anymore. Even if their friends ask if they want to come hang out, they'll ask who is there and if they don't like that person, it's a clear no and they don't feel the need to be there. And they don't go into detail about stupid stuff they've done. Also, they completely ignore questions they don't want to answer. They also keep their goals to themselves. Clear as that.

I think a part of growing is prevention- stick with your boundaries and standards. Keep your dreams and goals to yourself.