Need advice before filing tomorrow.

SzDiverge · 2019-10-08T01:57:22+00:00

I'm going through proceedings myself. I was told that filing first doesn't give anyone the upper hand, except maybe if you love in different counties and one is known to favor father's.

As for going for full everything as a scare tactic, I'm not sire that's a good idea. If all you really want is joint custody then go for that. My wife said over and over that she wants joint, then filed for fill custody. She said it was a "negotiating point" to start from. I'll tell you.. the mediator was not impressed with her bait and switch and it's gained me points. She has made all sorts of unreasonable demands, which just makes her look pretty and vindictive.

My advice to you is to think about what you really want out of this and go for that. Judges and lawyers see this stuff day in and day out. Don't piss them off by going over the top.

sc1617 · 2019-10-08T01:47:08+00:00

Don't write a lot of drama.... just state the facts and explain how her behavior is disruptive to you and your children's day to day life, and how it is emotionally abusive. Good luck!

desertstroller · 2019-10-08T00:54:13+00:00

Do it! Put them on the defensive.

MrDinkles7767 · 2019-10-08T01:27:50+00:00

Nope. Make it as nasty as possible. Include all of the sordid details. You want to put her on her heels

fckinwarriorprincess · 2019-10-08T10:26:22+00:00

Going after custody just to be salty will not work out well and cost you a lot money.

Is she a bad mother? Or just a bad wife?

If she’s just a shitty wife, don’t torture everyone. If the kids are not safe or well taken care of, of course fight for custody!

4agreements · 2019-10-08T18:00:35+00:00

Wow, all I can say is this is going to be as expensive as hell.

We all think our divorce is the nastiest, most horrible, crazy sit anyone has ever experienced. We want her to suffer, and feel the pain times ten, fuck that narcissist. You know who is going to “win”? The attorneys. Your divorce is not special, it’s not horrendous., it’s a divorce. The entire judicial system is fully funded by people like you every day.

This is what is going to happen:

The courts will grant 50/50 custody, your assets will be split equitably and you will send your kids to counseling. Done. You’re angry, rightfully so. She blew up your life and hurt your kids. But it happens a hundred times every day. Sure you can have your attorney demand the moon, and then she will hire an attorney to demand the moon and stars. The. You’ll be pissed because your attorney is not ‘ going after her’ and you’ll hire another attorney.......And you two will demand this sick attention from each other to flame the rage and spite.

After spending your kids college education funds, money for a new boat, and a fun vacation to Disney world , along with bitterly wasting 2 years of your life, you know what is going to happen?

You will have 50/50 custody and all finances will be split equitably.

Worse than the money wasted, you will both see your kids try to comprehend in their tiny brains, why their parents, who were once the most perfect people in the world to them, are now mean, scary people they will never be able for trust. This is the reality. I’m sorry. Divorced is fucked

hotantipasta · 2019-10-08T12:49:25+00:00

It depends on if your goal is to get divorced quickly or through a prolonged legal battle. Some states deny alimony to any person who has committed infidelity. If that is the case in your state then put all of the sorted details in your petition. If not, then just go for a divorce based on irreconcilable differences so you don't have to go through the trouble of proving infidelity. At fault divorces can add cost to any proceeding and will end with the same results as a no fault divorce. Most of all you should get an attorney to assist you.

Title	Need advice before filing tomorrow.
Author	alphatectz
Upvotes	11
Comments	39
Date	October 8, 2019 12:15 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/des8hb/need_advice_before_filing_tomorrow/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/need-advice-before-filing-tomorrow.819152 https://theredarchive.com/post/819152

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