When I was a teen and early 20s, when we went out with a girl, the guy was expected to do everything, from paying for the drinks to initiating intimacy.

I once went out with a girl who on our first date, while we were sitting at a bar she put her hand on my crotch and started squeezing. This was something new to me and to be honest it confused me.

I could not get hard. She made fun of that. She came up with this idea of using the premises of an organisation of which I was a member to spend the night there together. Again I could not get hard. She ended up getting me in trouble because it was discovered that I had spent the night with a girl in a place that was the headquarters of an organisation.

I know that I share some of the blame. But to this day, I sometimes get performance anxiety - I get this fear that I will not be able to perform. I trace it back to her.