How do you feel about women paying for the first dates?

hateCaptchas · 2013-08-13T17:36:02+00:00

It depends on who did the asking, for me. If I ask you to dinner, I prefer to pay. If we agree to meet, then we split. If you ask me, I'm prepared to pay but I'm also going to let you make the first move.

Nope.. been that way all my life.

LifterofThings · 2013-08-13T20:02:52+00:00

I usually insist on going dutch for the first date; I pay my way, he pays his. I've heard way too much "man, I bought her dinner and she didn't even fuck me, what a money-grubbing bitch"... I'd rather just buy my own dinner and eliminate any chance that I'll be perpetuating any of -that- bullshit.

After the first date I always offer to pay my own way, and thank him sincerely without further protest if he declines my offer.

Edited to add: in my current LTR we take turns "treating" each other. It just makes sense, money-wise.

MrsStrom · 2013-08-20T02:27:00+00:00

The man should pay. If she pays, it just smells like female dominance.

margerym · 2013-08-13T17:13:31+00:00

I'm old fashioned so I don't like it. It speaks to female dominance, IMO, and I don't want a relationship like that.

This subreddit hasn't impacted my opinion on this either way.

TempestTcup · 2013-08-13T17:54:58+00:00

I've always thought that the person that asks should pay. I don't really have any problems with paying, but if it is a real date with the guy picking her up at home (etc), he should pay just so that things don't get really awkward there at the end.

If the two agree to meet for drinks or something, they should take turns paying for rounds or each pay for their own.

luxerratic · 2013-08-18T06:34:13+00:00

I pay, or try to, whenever I feel like the date has been fun. Not because I'm dominant, but because its a way to say "thanks." I think guys get it, usually they tell me that no woman has ever done that for them before.... then they smile. On the other hand, when I go on a date, it's just for fun-- I'm not actively auditioning boyfriends, looking for a mate, or trying to get laid.

crankypants15 · 2013-08-29T13:36:40+00:00

I don't mind if a woman pays, but I do 100% of the asking of first dates. So I pay. But if she wants to plan and pay for the second date, I really like that. It shows she's willing to put effort into the relationship, even if we don't know each other well.

If she asked me out on a first date, I would like it, but I would also be shocked. I mean I might even be speechless, as in my brain no workee. I would also be very impressed and very interested in this very unusual girl. (Ladies, if you ask a guy out on a first date and he's silent, that's not a rejection! He just might be shocked because this is really really rare. So, poke him, and ask again. )

If by the 4th date she doesn't even offer to pay, it's over. That indicates she just doesn't want to make an effort to work things out. And she is certainly not wife material. If she's not going to make an effort during dating, she certainly won't make an effort during the marriage.

sugarcrush · 2013-08-13T18:44:14+00:00

I think the asker should pay, and alternate after that (although I wouldn't say no if he wanted to pay for everything). I wouldn't be against splitting the check, but the asker needs to make the other person aware beforehand. Just mention you prefer to go dutch and then make sure your date idea is financially feasible for the other person.

Also, I think those "check reach tests" are completely stupid.

[deleted] · 2013-08-14T01:17:34+00:00

i dont give a fuck who pays for what when, but i know the man does so i tended to leave it up to him when i "dated"

kekerae · 2013-08-14T02:51:54+00:00

My first date with my now husband was a cup of tea and a walk and he insisted on paying. I had my wallet at the ready, though. :)

[deleted] · 2013-08-17T21:32:25+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	How do you feel about women paying for the first dates?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	17
Date	August 13, 2013 5:08 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1kaeeo/how_do_you_feel_about_women_paying_for_the_first/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-do-you-feel-about-women-paying-for-the-first.83949 https://theredarchive.com/post/83949

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