Well guys, Is my female boss being friendly or harassing me, what do you think ?

Throwaway_Old_Guy · 2020-11-16T03:49:41+00:00

Without knowing her, it's a tough call for me to make.

Some women are comfortable touching others they feel relaxed with.

Toss out a flag by telling her that you have a childhood trauma that is triggered by unexpected touches. Maybe even flinch.

This should send enough of a message that she will stop. Going the HR route would probably not bode well for your career (as a Man) because many HR departments are women led, and word could spread.

It sucks that you are considering changing jobs because of this.

Akagi20 · 2020-11-16T01:01:23+00:00

Alright well two things first off it seems that she likes you and wants to take things further than being just coworkers altho her methods of conveying that to you are very inappropriate and should be addressed especially if they are making you uncomfortable which they seem to be doing so bring it to your HR department and see what happens

a-man-from-earth · 2020-11-16T05:33:53+00:00

Just tell her you're uncomfortable with the physical contact and would like to keep things more professional.

Ok-Rush-5486 · 2020-11-16T06:34:57+00:00

just say that you are uncomfortable with this. if it doesn't stop try not to get the legal system involved, she will fire you for that. is there hr there? because that is what they are for.

a_quiet_accountant · 2020-11-16T06:37:01+00:00

might wanna file a complaint with hr.

dontpet · 2020-11-16T01:03:20+00:00

I have a hard time not thinking those are flirts. I don't know how to manage the risks though. Probably best if you heard some stories about previous partners of hers before going near anything is that is what you mean to do.

NotherThrowaway284 · 2020-11-16T01:48:39+00:00

She's hitting on you and doing it wildly inappropriately. A man would be fired.

Does she own the company or just work above you in it? Going to H.R. would be a mistake in the former case but maybe not in the latter.

CairnWD · 2020-11-16T08:18:23+00:00

Hmmm, let's take a look at the situation:

So, ignoring the harassment part of the post, then it seems like a purely friendship oriented relationship, maybe even more if it turns out that she likes you. If that's the case, then I'd recommend asking her, and if she is, and you are as well, then either agree to start seeing each other, or politely turn her down, due to her being your boss

Now for the harassment part, now I may have read it wrong, but it doesn't necessarily seem like harassment to me, although to be fair, I don't know much about that sort of stuff. HOWEVER, if she is making uncomfortable, then reporting it to HR does seem like a good idea, or if you want it to be a little more private, then just take her to the side and politely tell her

Other than that, the only thing you should worry about is if you get fired or she makes a false allegation. If she does actually like you, then I highly doubt that would happen.

Happy to help

ApprehensiveMail8 · 2020-11-16T14:55:49+00:00

Are you in the US?

TheSkyElf · 2020-11-16T15:23:40+00:00

Female here ready to help

she is your boss, its already a nono I would advice not to pursue this if you are interested

2.

put both her hands around my neck for making a data entry mistake

Wait what? Is she hurting you? I need more info because this can mean different things depending on the other body language she is doing at the same time.

Innuendos and dancing. She can just be a cheery person at times or she is REALLY going for it.

You need to ask if she is dating someone (subtly) and/or if she is interested in someone. "Are you going home to a special someone tonight/spending time with them this weekend?" See how she reacts. If she is single she might be testing the waters to see if she wants you as either a near friend or a... well partner. If she is single and middle-aged (and childless) her body/mind might be searching for a partner.

The whole physical thing can be a sign of her trying to gauge what type of person you are. If she sits next to you does she let your hips touch? Does she let your thighs touch because that is a indicator that she wants closer contact.

With an outgoing person, you need to be straight forwards, especially if you have a line like this

I feel I might be in a world of hurt if i don't make the right move here.

McGauth925 · 2020-12-05T23:55:50+00:00

Be very, very ready to start looking for a new job. The law really doesn't treat men and women as equals. Neither does public opinion.

If she's making moves on you, then there can be serious backlash if you don't respond as she wishes. If she's not, and you respond in any kind of amorous way, you will be seen as the culprit.

tilfordkage · 2020-11-16T01:47:28+00:00

I'm not sure if it's harassment or just her being terrible at flirting.

Title	Well guys, Is my female boss being friendly or harassing me, what do you think ?
Author	Cougar427XR7
Upvotes	9
Comments	33
Date	November 15, 2020 8:27 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/jussy7/well_guys_is_my_female_boss_being_friendly_or/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/well-guys-is-my-female-boss-being-friendly-or.840673 https://theredarchive.com/post/840673

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