Is there any success stories of solving Madonna/whore complex?

sierrasecho · 2014-06-27T16:28:31+00:00

Is it just me, or was that a poorly written article?

I'm fairly sure my SO does NOT want me to be like his mum... yes he loves being nurtured, and cared for. But men don't want their partners to be "matronly", or to be "mothered" by their partners, they want a sexy wife, no?

My SOs mum left her family when his dad was having a rough time, depressed, and unemployed in a small town. She took the younger daughter, and left my SO to handle taking care of a suicidal father and no income. My SO got a job to support the two of them while he was still in high school, but it was an incredibly rough time. He resented his mother for a long time after that, though they are on good terms now. She has made quips about "She Who Must be Obeyed" which I have shot down (as politely as possible). He loves my loyalty, that I look after him, but also that I (happily) fulfill his sexual needs.

I thought it came down to the way to navigate this was "Lady on the streets, freak in the sheets"... with the clear understanding that the freak in the sheets is for your SO, and him alone. The illusion of purity to the outside world, and not the reputation as the town bicycle.

I've never heard this concept expressed the way he has. Meh.

2014-06-27T09:13:12+00:00

Ohhhhh Splendor In The Grass reference, my heart...

http://www.tcm.com/mediaroom/video/296143/Splendor-In-The-Grass-Movie-Clip-Down-On-My-Knees.html

aaron_the_just · 2014-06-27T16:08:54+00:00

Get to know a man's parents. If the mother is masculine and doesn't seem like the kind to provide any nurturing, you'll probably end up being his mommy.

banditgirl · 2014-06-27T21:09:16+00:00

Interesting. Just a side thought as I was reading through this article -

Doesn't the 'Madonna/whore complex' have some very strong parallels to to the 'Alpha Fux Beta Bux' attitude of many modern women?

-Men want someone sweet, feminine, and possibly like their mother to marry/Men want someone hot and kinky to take to bed

-Women want someone hot and strong to take to bed/Women want a stable provider to marry

The concepts nearly mirror each other. And I think the whole issue with women (not RPW) is they don't seem to think that AF guy can also be the BB guy - just like these men with the Madonna/whore complex don't think they can find both in one person.

But it seems to me, RP relationships are only possible because both the man and the woman in the relationship are, to use the author's term "fully evolved" men and women. Or to use my own phrasing, self-aware.

coco-butter · 2014-06-27T10:16:17+00:00

Wow... reading this has made me fully understand my last break up..

Spore2012 · 2014-06-27T13:27:54+00:00

From what I understand these men may have mothers (these women give off a masculine energy)that lean in the neglectful side. They seek out women that are super nurturing, feminine looking for a replacement, someone to help them. Add- if their father is absent from their lives.....run.

Spore2012 · 2014-06-27T07:51:49+00:00

I'm of the caveat he mentions about the mom thing. While she is a sweet person, she is dumb as rocks, and she has bipolar disorder and does crazy things from time to time and people take advantage of her.

So while she's mom my and I love her, I didn't ever respect her. Even as a teenager.

So naturally, the women I am attracted to, or are attracted to me are the crazy/stupid ones. It's a bit of a problem, and why I haven't been in a relationship for over a year now. I'm very weary of the patterns and the fact that I am the common variable, I'm probably a bit of a co-dependent or something. I should probably do therapy for it, but I'm poor.

Anyway, I think this whole article is sort of partially correct, although it's a little more intricate than the author claims. If you wanna check out some discussions about this, it's a common theme on loveline and the podcasts I listen to. I have all the shit time stamped here: http://www.reddit.com/r/DrDrew/comments/20xqe8/i_timestamp_all_profound_things_from_drews/

I HIGHLY suggest red pillers to listen to this stuff: (if I were to plagarize/paraphrase each of these time stamps into my own separate OPs, it would probably amass upvotes)

Dr. Drew podcast:

009 ~Entire episode on the difference between men and women.

031 ~3 Why and how the different sexes cheat. ~23 Talking about how Friendzones work.

046 ~36 On knowing/fixing people. ~Entire episode is good about how men and women treat and act in relationships with each other, and what they need and don't want.

064 Female to Male testosterone understanding of men and women and male drives. ~27 Entire call with Jenn.

115 ~Entire episode about love and intimacy disorders, sexual addictions, co-dependency, abandonment/enmeshment etc.

Adam & Drew Show:

056 ~48:15 Guys brains wired for sex.

100 ~30 About Breakups, Need Space etc.

113 First call 10 min, When and Why to move in together in relationships. Not always healthy.

Loveline

Loveline-2002-09-29 ~84 Dichotomy for men and women that is funny (girls will repeatedly do things they don't like to do even after adverse reaction, and men's drive will keep trying anyway)

Loveline-2002-10-13 ~47:25 Men and women's brains are much different ~56:30 Technicality/morality/ethical question on dating more than one at a time

07-10-2003 ~58:20 DIFFERENCES IN SEXES

09-03-2003 ~41:15 CHICKS CAN'T NSA

09-25-2003 ~30:30 GUYS COMMIT

11-16-2003 ~66:25 SEX IS PRIORITY

Loveline - 2004-07-26 ~67:10 when guys dump chicks.

Loveline - 2004-07-21 ~31 smart guys vs hot chicks

Loveline - 2004-08-30 ~75 opposite or same as parents

Loveline - 2004-09-09 ~69:15 lol guys turning on vs girls

Loveline - 2004-11-18 ~55:18 guys are like pets-not want food or sex something wrong with them

Loveline - 2004-08-31 ~81:45 The Three things guys want

2014-06-27T18:15:08+00:00

Part of this is true, part of it is bullshit.

First, yes, when looking at potential women I will sort of unconsciously place them into one of three groups: potential LTR, potential sex, and "no thanks." There is generally very little overlap. Who I go after will depend on context. Am I looking for an LTR at the moment? Where are we: a sleazy bar, a night club, whole foods, etc.? Wearing slutty clothing at a bar will get me to notice you, sure, but only as a potential lay. "I would not bring her home to meet my parents" is at the back of my mind.

BUT, this has virtually nothing to do with wanting a girl like my mother. It has to do with me not wanting to wife-up someone who banged the whole basketball team. Being kinky and wanting sex from me as an LTR is a good thing. Who wants to date a prude? There's a difference between being a slut and being fun in bed.

popsicle30 · 2014-06-27T12:52:33+00:00

Omg, what if you accidentally marry a guy with this complex.

proprioceptor · 2014-06-27T13:06:41+00:00

Wow. This. So much sense.

Bakerofpie · 2014-06-28T17:46:38+00:00

I guess it could be that I know a lot of outliers, but I've met very few men who seem to be this way. I'm nothing like my husband's mom, aside from being a kind and pleasant person who enjoys feminine activities. I was even less like my last boyfriend's mom, and the last, and so on. I've also never had a boyfriend show disdain or bewilderment at my sexual side. If it's really that rare a gem to find a man who can appreciate a woman as both a freak in the sheets and a lady in the streets within the same person, I must be the luckiest woman on the planet to have been acquainted almost solely with those sorts.

Title	Is there any success stories of solving Madonna/whore complex?
Author	throwawaynamegame
Upvotes	12
Comments	31
Date	June 27, 2014 5:01 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/297ubc/is_there_any_success_stories_of_solving/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/is-there-any-success-stories-of-solving.84637 https://theredarchive.com/post/84637

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