Meeting the Parents/Family of your SO

katsumii · 2016-01-05T18:32:58+00:00

Don't pay any mind to what other people say. If he wants you to meet his family that is because he finds that you are worth being a part of his family. People don't know what goes on between you and him so their opinions mean nothing.

I met JD's family after a month because it is the holidays. Plus I'd already met his kids so meeting the family isn't that much more of a stretch. It probably would have taken longer but not by much.

Next time someone says "Wow, that's really soon!" Just say "Yeah! Things are going really well for us :)"

ragnarockette · 2016-01-05T19:04:07+00:00

I spent a week with my (now fiance)'s family only 2 weeks after we started dating. However we'd been friends for over a year, so went from 0 to 100 pretty quickly.

His family is so nice - it was very easy. However I'm someone who needs a good bit of downtime to feel centered, and it was a bit stressful to be "on" for a full week. I get along great with his folks and brother and sister!

proprioceptor · 2016-01-05T17:29:32+00:00

This sounds VERY similar to the first time I went out to meet my (now husband's) family. We had been dating for about that time, but we had already had a serious talk about the direction our relationship was going. I got a little bit of shock from my friends, and a lot from my family. They said the same things yours said "Wow, that's really soon!"

No one can make that call but you. If you feel like it's time to meet the parents, it's time to meet the parents!

Hope your meeting went well :)

littleteafox · 2016-01-05T20:56:51+00:00

So the guy I'm currently seeing, we've known each other for about 6 months but have only started dating for the past couple of weeks. He's already suggested doing a double date with his sister and her fiance (one of those Escape Rooms.. looks fun/scary!) and when I made him brownies over the weekend he gave some to his mother to try. I have no idea what that means, but I am assuming it's not bad!

I think meeting family is still pretty significant, especially the parents. I think with my last SO I met his parents after 3-4 months.

Kittenkajira · 2016-01-05T21:11:17+00:00

I actually met his parents pretty early. His dad had an ATV accident and was hospitalized, that was just a couple of weeks into dating my SO. I met his dad for the first time in the hospital.

I'd been dating him for maybe a month when I met his mother. SO was sharing a house with his brother at the time - we went over to their place after a date, and it just so happened that his mom was there visiting. Just goes to show the importance of always looking presentable! She greeted me warmly with things like "I've heard a lot about you", and I'm sure I blushed to my toes.

I think meeting family is an important milestone in a relationship. In my last relationship, the MIL was god-awful, so I was both excited and nervous to see what his family was like. Thankfully they are a close, pleasant bunch. I could tell right away that we'd all get along just fine. His brother even irritates me in an annoyingly brotherly way. :)

It was quite a bit longer before he met my family, since they live on the opposite coast (USA). He met most of them this year, and liked them. My mom and I are very much alike, so they got along fine.

always-be-closing · 2016-01-05T20:18:51+00:00

She said "Wow, that's really soon!" and was super surprised.

Bet she hasn't dated guys like your fella because she's not the kind of girl those fellas date.

Keep it up OP.

Is meeting the families of your SOs still as significant nowadays than in the past as adult children become more and more independent of their families?

Not everyone is fortunate enough to have a real Mother and a real Father.

No one will ever, ever, ever care as much about you as much as they do.

Not a spouse, not your own child, not your siblings, not friends or coworkers.

No one can ever love you as much as they can. It's not just a spiritual wishy-washy thing; I mean, in a real evolutionary sense, no one can ever really care as much for your wellbeing as they potentially can.

It's a very important thing to meet and know their guardians, their first teachers, the people who love them more than anything else in the world and always will be.

2016-01-06T00:33:54+00:00

I met my husband's family ~4 weeks after our first date. He took me to a family function - talk about baptism by fire!! I was worried that they wouldn't like me but it was okay.

I think it means a lot less these days - it's more like getting your family prepared in case the relationship becomes more serious, rather than a sign of something big.

CamusSeesSumac · 2016-01-06T02:33:24+00:00

I had known his parents for years before we started dating, so I didn't have the nervousness. I still get nervous around them and want them to like me, but it's silly because they clearly love me a lot.

EngineerInPearls · 2016-01-06T02:59:04+00:00

I met my SO's parents while meeting his mother's entire family (aunts, uncles, grandparents) It was his grandparents anniversary and we had only been dating six-ish weeks at that point. It was completely overwhelming, but it was really awesome to know that he felt that we would be getting serious.

liftinginthemoment · 2016-01-07T21:54:53+00:00

I've been with my boyfriend for just under 6 months and met his parents about 4 months in to the relationship. They live a four hour drive away but we went on a road trip and popped in on our way home and we also recently stayed with them for Christmas. If the holidays had come up sooner in our relationship then I likely would have met them sooner. My own parents live on the other side of the world so my boyfriend won't be meeting them any time soon haha.

I think the significance can depend on a lot of things. I found it significant partly because my bf's relationship with his parents is... interesting. When we popped in to see them briefly this was the first time he'd seen them in nearly 2 years (however he speaks to his dad regularly). He was glad to have me there with him and it went well which is why we went back for Christmas =)

I think how soon you meet them parents would depend on a lot of factors (including holidays, birthdays, where they live etc) so I don't think it's really something you can put an ideal time frame on.

first9error · 2016-01-09T06:59:45+00:00

I feel like I'm in a very different position than most women. I don't want children. This allows me the luxury of taking relationships slowly.

If you want children, it's best to have them before your late 20s hit. Fertility begins to decline at 27-28. That puts a very small time frame on finding a partner you trust and love enough to have kids with. So, for people who can't wait time, 3 months sounds fine to me. You want to get to know your partner as much as possible, and meeting his family is a big part of that. If you want kids, you really shouldn't be having flings or LTRs that aren't headed towards marriage. Not because it's immoral or anything - you're just wasting time.

For myself, I'd think about 6 months would be an okay time. Sooner or later, depending on the relationship I found myself in.

Title	Meeting the Parents/Family of your SO
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	20
Comments	20
Date	January 5, 2016 5:23 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/3zl4mk/meeting_the_parentsfamily_of_your_so/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/meeting-the-parentsfamily-of-your-so.85887 https://theredarchive.com/post/85887

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