Looking for guidance on self control

becomingabetterme88 · 2016-04-22T13:09:52+00:00

Something that helped me at the beginning (emphasis on "beginning!") stages of revamping my diet was focusing on adding in healthy foods, rather than taking out bad ones. I would set veggie quotas for myself, for example, and make sure to get enough water/green tea. Once I developed a taste for these healthy foods, it was much easier to let go of the breads and cookies etc.

Alphaspire · 2016-04-22T11:04:07+00:00

There is no magic answer that will make everything easier. It's work. You have to make a plan, decide to follow it, then do it. Refine your plan when necessary, like when you're not making progress or you're pushing yourself to a new level.

I was raised almost completely undisciplined in those areas, and as a result was obese at 18. Since then, I've developed discipline in nutrition and exercise. It was worth every bit if discomfort I went through to get where I am now.

You will screw up. Don't take it too hard, just be sure to learn from your mistakes and press forward from there. Really think about your mistakes. Why did you falter? What can you do to prevent that behavior in the future? Mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow.

Reward your successes. Think about how you achieved them. Reinforce the behavior that led to your successes, come up with ways to improve those habits further.

If you're worried about disciplining yourself about food, just know that the answer is simple, but not easy: ignore the foods that don't help you progress to where you want to be. Don't be so harsh with yourself as to not enjoy a slice of birthday cake or whatever once a month or so, but don't eat those kinds of foods on a regular basis by any means. Get used to turning down offers of junk food. Once you establish the habit of not eating junk, it gets a lot easier, and personally I started to dislike the cheap taste of many junk foods that I used to crave.

For exercise, you just need to make yourself do it routinely for a while and then you'll be hooked on the feeling you get from it. Don't push yourself too hard at first, but make the habit of getting a good sweat going at least 3 times a week. Eventually you'll actually be addicted to exercise (which isn't bad in itself) and will be irritated when you can't get a workout in. Few feelings are better than the one you get post-shower after a hard workout.

baked_him_cake · 2016-04-22T12:44:35+00:00

There's no easy way to start. I read recently on r/xxfitness that it doesn't matter how frequently you go to the gym as long as you manage to go at least once a week. One a week is still better than not going. Start off small. Make small changes to your diet. I'm not a big fan of removing bad food here because that makes me only want it more. I'm doomed to fail. Instead, substitute for healthier options.

I'm a bit of a planner. I have chores scheduled into my calendar because it helps me keep track of what I need to do. If I had it on a to-do list, I would probably do it later (or in some cases never). With that said, I schedule my gym sessions into my week. I make it a point to go 3 or 4 days out of the week. I prefer to go every other day, but if life gets in the way, then I force myself to go even if it's 3 consecutive days.

You will fail and often question yourself, but keep going. Take pictures and measurements as oppose to weighing yourself.

maya_elena · 2016-04-22T13:44:56+00:00

So for me, I don't like the gym (still working on motivating myself), but I've done well with non-structured classes - e.g., a competitive/performance dance (ballroom, Bollywood) or a martial arts group. Since you are probably on or near a college campus, there may plenty of such clubs open to you on a free or low-cost basis. (It's also a great way to meet people! :p)

I also found that the best way hands down of controlling diet for me is not buying the bad stuff. Especially if the grocery store is more than 10 mins away walking, so getting a snack is a non-marginal effort. No snacking on cereal at 2 am if there are none to be had in the house!

[deleted] · 2016-04-22T20:47:28+00:00

I saved this a few years ago and it's still great. Self control is easier when you consider that you're doing favors to the 'future you'. It's a great way to practice future time oriented thinking.

CocoaMotive · 2016-04-22T14:23:16+00:00

My two cents - Support, support, support. Surround yourself with supportive friends, even if its just online support. You could create a social media account specifically for posting about your food and exercise diary. The thing that will separate the successful from the unsuccessful in this area is who has support and accountability and who doesn't.

ThorsdaySaturnday · 2016-04-23T00:34:30+00:00

Be mindful of your body and what it needs. Often, when we don't take care of our bodies it lets us know by making us feel like crap. When you eat, eat mindfully. That is, when you eat a salad, how does it make you feel versus after eating some greasy fast food? Pay attention to your energy levels after eating fresh food versus after eating processed food.

Like many people, I grew up eating TV dinners and junk. It wasn't until I started practicing yoga, which teaches mindfulness and self-awareness, that I was able to change my habits. Hope this advice helps!

IllDoMyBest · 2016-04-25T20:05:36+00:00

You have already recieved great advice, but I'll still give you my two cents.

Concerning discipline with your diet, I would recommend taking baby steps. Do you drink, say, four cans of soda a day? Start by cutting that down to three and drink more water instead. Then cut further down until you get to where you want to be. The same goes with food. If you go too hard on yourself you might lose the motivation to change. Maybe continue eating what you eat now if your diet is not too healthy, and focus first on eating until you feel about 80% full. This is because it takes about 20 minutes for your brain to fully understand that you are full. Eventually you will eat less and not feel hungry, and then you can focus on eating healthier.

For exercise, also here it is good to start slow if you have problems with motivating/disciplining yourself to work out. Figure out what kind of exercise that works for you and stick to doing a bit of that regularly. You don't have to do one hour every day, just do it for as long as you want - the important thing is to do more than nothing. Then hopefully you will start looking forward to exercising, and maybe you want to increase the duration and intensity of your work out sessions.

Good luck!

[deleted] · 2016-04-22T20:00:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

code5fun · 2016-04-28T13:20:56+00:00

You gain more self control by not giving your body everything it wants. You are a soul and a body. Your body is an animal and your soul is an angel. The one you feed gets more control over you. You need to weaken your limbic system (emotions and desires) and strengthen your prefrontal cortex (executive control). This is how you gain more self control and overcome procrastination. The way you do that is meditate and tame your body (no porn, popcorn or chocolate). Allow your mind to be quit and stop worrying that you are not disciplined enough with yourself.

Watch this for worrying: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emHAoQGoQic

For the diet, it helps to have defined meals, defined amount of food at a defined point in time. It helps keeping track on how much you ate and makes it easier to follow your diet. And cook yourself!

Title	Looking for guidance on self control
Author	Jwilliams__
Upvotes	19
Comments	20
Date	April 22, 2016 9:59 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/4fxsqa/looking_for_guidance_on_self_control/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/looking-for-guidance-on-self-control.86139 https://theredarchive.com/post/86139

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