She went on two trips - yearly vacation, roughly 20 days or so. We use a calendar to track kid days. So she hasn't looked at it and says "oh it's common sense that if I have him (son) on the weekend you'll have him on the other one". She hasn't looked at the calendar and makes changes to it now. So now I have to cancel all my paid reservations because of her? 🤷‍♂️

I told her NO. If I just leave the kid with her on the weekend she might do the same right before my vacation which is coming soon, and I'll possibly losing much more on flights and reservations. So it sounds like I have to suck it up...

Accountability is clearly not for her, but how do you navigate the stalemate here without playing any dirty games? I'm trying to grey rock, be stoic about it, but usually I lose these battles because I know shes capable of going much lower...

I need some better tools to avoid this scenario. Just when I'm thinking I'm out of this mess it comes back and I relapse into anger mode.