Emotional detachment

Hopeful_Divorce · 2026-03-15T14:09:20+00:00

The desire to just get out is real. Talk to a lawyer, don't just give it all away. You will regret it.

I know more than one family law lawyer who got divorced. After fighting in court for clients for decades, when it came to their own divorce they didn't fight. They over paid a little and got out as quickly as they could. I think that's telling because they could fight in court and it would cost them nothing but time and some effort. Instead they choose to give up a little bit to get out.

Don't let her have it all. You will regret that long term. But having the attitude that your peace is worth something too and if necessary you'll let her have what she wants on a few things (NOT everything ) just to get it over can be a really healthy approach. You do need to fight for yourself but not necessarily fight to the death on every single thing.

andytdj · 2026-03-15T12:46:33+00:00

I feel you on the emotional disconnect. The numerous apolgies for infidelity have fallen on deaf ears. However, dude, fight for your self here man. Just becuase you don't want to engage with her doesn't mean you should give up everything. It's not easy, but you will be thanking yourself the rest of your life if you do the work now to defend what is rightfully yours.

Royal-Chipmunk-3380 · 2026-03-12T06:34:16+00:00

yes. but in case of a divorce, please don`t go without an attorney. cut your looses loose, if you have to loose everything to not have to pay alimony(unless you have over 1M in assets, dont give everything hahaha, just be generous... alimony over 5 years is hell - im stuck with 15 years), so be it ; and go find how good the life is. It is worthless to be miserable for long(i wouldn`t say miserable, more like "living in nothiness"). from experience I`ve waisted over 25 years hoping things would get better, trying to still fullfill all my obligations in the marriage and as the head of the household, and left me either way (months after divorce ex got remarried), I wish I left it sooner.

Immediate-Story2562 · 2026-03-12T04:58:18+00:00

I hope you don't mean that you are just going to give everything (assets, etc.) to her?
She should only get what she is entitled to by law and nothing more.

Koi_Fish_Mystic · 2026-03-12T02:39:50+00:00

I got to a point where I just thought “fuck it, she’s out with her girlfriends, I’m going to go out with my friends”.

We are living together due to finances. We haven’t split up yet. I think my retirement will the point where we walk away from each other.

Ok-Anything-3605 · 2026-03-12T01:47:33+00:00

It’s an emotional roller coaster for sure. Good luck on your decision and your journey forward. This subreddit is helping me heal, slowly but surely.

Title	Emotional detachment
Author	Future-Fan-7732
Upvotes	9
Comments	10
Date	March 12, 2026 1:19 AM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1rrczao/emotional_detachment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/emotional-detachment.1575265 https://theredarchive.com/post/1575265

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