In a funk

techrmd3 · 2023-10-07T00:38:06+00:00

eh it's normal post divorce you have a hole in your life. As you heal there will be ups and downs AND sometimes those downs will come for no reason at all.

Only worry if it persists but it sounds like you are doing fine OP.

Theedon · 2023-10-07T02:32:22+00:00

A "rut" is what I call them. I even had them in my marriage. I had to break the daily routine and do something new. New restaurant, or new type of food, walk somewhere new. New type of experience other than the same old stuff.

If you haven't been to a gun range, go! Get a lane, rent something fun and blow $50 on ammo.

If it's Saturday, go drive 500 miles. Where did you end up? Find out where and make a story about it to tell us.

Read a book.

Alatornio · 2023-10-07T06:34:27+00:00

Things are going pretty good for me, but I still feel weird.

I found a 27 year old woman who actually wants to be with me. I am 38. This alone should end my funk.

But it doesn't. I think I may permanently feel a bit... off... until my child reaches adulthood and I no longer ever need to deal with ex.

Its a very long road to recovery.

0 contact with ex has helped most. I think for both of us to be honest.

Orwell_Hear · 2023-10-07T02:55:15+00:00

Perhaps there’s a correlation between your funk and not hitting the gym as often as you’d like. I know I feel a lot better even after busting out 25 quick pushups. Start there, then get your ass to the gym, put some loud ass music in your ears, and crank! You got this!

FigurativeLasso · 2023-10-07T22:13:10+00:00

Where have you met women? My divorce is wrapping up and I’m about ready to leave the tent

GuyRedditAccount · 2023-10-08T20:12:46+00:00

I hear you man. I don't have much to offer, as I'm very early in the process, but I go through ups and downs, too--even though I can't wait to be done with her (she cheated on me pretty egregiously). I think it's just the weirdness of going from all I've ever known for over 10 years to... something different. Fear of the unknown, and all that. I like stability, and this is the complete opposite of that. I also want my STBXW to be sad and missing me, like she would finally realize that I was a pretty great guy to have around instead of cheat on me, and it depresses me to think that she will probably be happier without me (and it depresses me even more that it will probably be with her AP).

A friend of mine told me that the transition during this time period is scary, but the transition will be your salvation. You’re not trying to replace what you had. You’re trying to figure out your new existence. You’re not building a new life. You just want someone you can enjoy life with. You’ll be blown away about how much more compatible you are with someone.

Ask yourself: How can I start becoming the person that I choose to be? And go start doing it.

You got this--and I do, too. Let's do it.

Title	In a funk
Author	ThunderFan462
Upvotes	17
Comments	10
Date	October 7, 2023 12:27 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/171sik4/in_a_funk/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/in-a-funk.1234253 https://theredarchive.com/post/1234253

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