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It's only 4 hours

Final_Minimum1443 · 2025-12-05T03:11:15+00:00

I know it's only four hours. I know there are divorced dads that have it worse out there. The days I work and come home I miss that one hour with my...

Final_Minimum1443

December 5, 2025

11 upvotes

/r/Divorce_Men

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Post Information

Title	It's only 4 hours
Author	Final_Minimum1443
Upvotes	11
Comments	3
Date	December 5, 2025 3:11 AM UTC (7 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1pek8au/its_only_4_hours/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/its-only-4-hours.1568085 https://theredarchive.com/post/1568085

Comments

[–]Candidate_Worldly 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Reflog1791 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

My out of the box strategy to avoid misery and live an awesome life:

I broke the “rules” of this sub. First I talked to ten top tier referred lawyers, several told me you can’t afford to retain me. Then with lawyers blessing and no custody agreement I moved out - avoided silver bullet and got away from cheater.

Then I told cheater, my turn to party you will watch the kid. Kid dropped off at my doorstep in 15 minutes (reverse psychology works wonders in divorce).

The laws in my state say CS is based on income not parenting time. The bill must be paid or my life gets miserable. That means my North Star became: keep my job and get into cash flow positive situation. Even more critical than the parenting stuff we gripe about because no job or severe debt crushes your parenting ability.

My situation analysis told me, “she gets this money she will handle the load and I will have frequent high quality parenting time. I don’t want to be an every other weekend dad but I cannot be Mr Mom either.

Therefore I pitched my custody schedule: every other day but you do an extra weekday. So I have my kid two weekdays and one weekend day including the overnights.

The result is a wonderful lifestyle where I have my kid pretty much every other day. While tons of men on this sub are complaining about week on week off I have the easiest routines ever and the best of both worlds. Built the schedule around golf league. No kid? I’m golfing. Have the kid? We do fun stuff. There’s no arguing or nonsense it’s the easiest thing ever. There’s no shuffling shit back and forth everything she needs to live here full time is here. Idgaf about a pair of shoes I’ve got 3 more here.

I got this sweet setup through the art of the deal. It was a sales job. I looked at my opponents wants and needs first and foremost then found win-win deals by leveraging HER wants to accomplish my goals: keeping my job and having cash flow so my life is good.

Therefore my message to people working on custody agreements is, do you want to be gutted every other week or do you want to say, “see you on Thursday”?

Do you want to be Mr Mom then lonely divorced dad or just dad who gets to golf all the time?

For me, every other weekend and every other week were not solutions. Now I just pay for a nanny every other day and play golf.

[–]Fantastic-Demand-171 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link