Ok Gents here it goes. (Throwaway account)

Married 21 years. She filed for divorce in August. We both have lawyers. After receiving the papers we (she and I) sat down at the kitchen table and "worked out" a deal in principal with an amount that I would need to have to bought out at from the house. I then received the first draft of her settlement agreement. It was 98% what we discussed other than the buyout of my portion of the house. Her settlement agreement now stated that I get nothing for the house and if I want equity that she will take half of my 401k and pension.

I told her that I have a buy out price when we had our initial discussion and have not budged from that number. She has undervalued the house, and I am willing to walk away with my number and take a loss to just end this and not mess with either of our retirements.

I am now going to get the house appraised and she is not happy about it. Tough nuts to her about this part. She fucked around and now she is finding out.

I know this is pretty simple math her assets - my assets so for easy math for example

Her 401k 170k My 401k+pension 185k the difference is 15k in her favor. Our largest shared asset is the home. We live in a 50/50 state (KY).

The way I am seeing this is that she has 3 options right now

  1. Pay me my buy out number, and have this done and over with.
  2. Play halves with our retirements and then pay me out half the equity in the house based on the appraisal, or a negotiated amount.

  3. Sell the house at a price we both agree upon and split the equity.

    The house and mortgage are her name, I put the down payment on it. I have contributed to the payments, payed the insurance and provided for the upkeep for the past 21 years, so I do deserve something from the home.

I just want a second opinion to make sure that I am on the right track with this.

Thanks!