This all feels too easy.

Qohelet77 · 2019-10-24T11:47:59+00:00

This is exactly what my STBXW and I are doing. No lawyers, shared custody, moderate child support, splitting everything 50/50, all very amicable. It’s possible friend. If you haven’t already, I highly encourage you both to have separate attorneys review your final paperwork before you go see the judge to finalize. Mine was $500, cheap in the long run. We prove up in court tomorrow morning! PM me if you have any questions or just want to talk! I’m happy to share anything that may be helpful to you.

winethief · 2019-10-24T23:21:46+00:00

Same here. 3 kiddos. My ex and I went to a mediator, worked it all out ourselves, became better friends as a result and now we enjoy a kick ass friendship centered around 3 charming kids. I pay $500/kid per month and she’s able to make ends meet with that. We could probably write a book on getting divorced and staying friends. Sure, there were minor bumps but the deal is this: you have the opportunity to make this a good thing where everyone is happy and that’s all anyone really wants. So go do that. Sounds like you’re on the right track!

flourishnone · 2019-10-24T11:22:26+00:00

I dont mean to poison anything but why if you have 50/50 custody are you paying her a dime?

Of course its going amicably. She is going to go live off your money while you pay her for the privilege of baby sitting her kids while she goes out and does her thing.

The answer is simple. She is getting what she thinks she wants or maybe she knows and doesn't care.

What she will (or maybe not) realize is that she is throwing away a (seemingly) good man for a life that will eventually leave her unfulfilled and empty.

dday_throwaway3 · 2019-10-24T11:43:15+00:00

Divorce is not the time to be a cheap bastard. It's time to smash open the piggy bank. You've already made a huge blunder giving her half the bank account. She'll spend that, and in the final orders you'll be ordered to give half of what's left (ie, what's in your bank account).

Any CS money you give her now is a gift. And if you agreed to an amount of CS below guidelines, it will be trivial for her to get CS enforced at the guideline level.

There are many pitfalls when navigating divorce, and it's easy to end up in a nightmare scenario even when you have the best of intentions.

GemJack · 2019-10-24T12:15:21+00:00

Mine was this way, the only minor hiccup was when went before the judge and some of the paperwork I was using wasn't the county's preference, but all ended well.

misdreavus79 · 2019-10-24T12:54:59+00:00

Better safe than sorry, of course, but yes. It’s possible to have an amicable divorce where things work out. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. People (and for whatever reason especially in this sub) have beaten down this idea in people’s heads that divorce is excruciating and the other party is out to clean you dry and make your life miserable. Believe what your eyes are telling you instead of what other may try to put in your head.

That said, protect yourself. Document everything, and research lawyers in your area in case you need one.

ThePhunkyPhantom13 · 2019-10-24T13:02:27+00:00

After a similar situation we have split everything 50/50 and had an arbitrator help us with a no fault and have been waiting 3 long months now waiting anxiously for the judges signature. I feel that concern of it not being accepted.

Title	This all feels too easy.
Author	hrspwrs
Upvotes	5
Comments	18
Date	October 24, 2019 10:49 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/dmenj0/this_all_feels_too_easy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/this-all-feels-too-easy.1203232 https://theredarchive.com/post/1203232

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