Video calls

2BlackPeople · 2020-04-03T18:40:47+00:00

Ignore her and continue videos calls for the kids sake.

ciscokid12345 · 2020-04-03T19:01:06+00:00

This is temporary... When the kids are old enough (like 6) put facebook messenger on their tablets and they will start video calling you when they are bored. When they are older (like 10) get them their own cell phone and cut her out of the loop.
Cheers!

Jamcamleh · 2020-04-03T19:22:01+00:00

Hang in there Man. Try not to let it get to you. I know that is frustrating because you don’t have control but it is your reality. I have been dealing with this same thing for almost 5 years. She does it because she wants control. It has taken me a long time to accept this and I will admit that it does get to me occasionally. Be there for your kids, keep calling and talking to them and know that as they get older they will become more wise as to what the situation is and what is going on.

DivorcingSantaClaus · 2020-04-03T22:42:23+00:00

From what you're saying, you have two options:

First, going back to court is always an option. (Not a fun or cheap option) But, a judge may order her not to oversee your chats with the kids.

Second, accept that this is how you have to communicate with the children and enjoy every moment of it. Try to ignore your ex's voice. Love your children through the screen and hopefully, after time, your ex's face and voice won't interfere with your communication with your amazing kiddos. If you focus to the best of your abilities on your children's faces and voices, maybe that's all you'll see, after time.

I wish you luck. Enjoy the kids.

jpgtsi · 2020-04-03T23:48:18+00:00

So I just had a call with my two sons 9 and 5, again on speaker. I was talking normally with them, asking how they are doing? How do you feel? How is the school work coming along? Asking about any new games they may be playing. I was also calming their fears about everything else going on in the world right now. She engages in the conversation like we are all having a group conversation, comments on everything I say or the kids say. I finally asked my son to take me off of speaker which he did. Then she continues to talk in the background to comment on what the kids are saying or directing the conversation.

I honestly need some feedback here. I do not pump my children for information about her, I do not care. I do not say one bad thing to them. I want my privacy as I give it to her.

ElliotMarriott · 2020-04-04T14:31:49+00:00

I am in a similar situation literally lost everything , house ,car. $100000 settlement, $30000 lawyers fees ,$3000 supervised visit and most importantly 7 months I could not see my son . She falsely accused me of abuse took off to the women shelter . I am a strong supporter of curving domestic violence but the women shelter did everything they could to let me see my son . I was cleared of any wrong doing at the end of it . Noting happened to her legally about the false allegations . After all this next came the calls to child service , and to maintainance enforcement. I am not here to say I know how you feel or I am worst off . I said this lots here keep reminding your self you are the dad a great dad that wants to see and be a part of the kids lives. Do everything you can to be there . Allow your self to be angry / feel what ever you want but don’t let it consume you . If you need to vent / chat we are all here .

nuclearxp · 2020-04-03T23:39:26+00:00

Get video calls in writing. Get grounds of calls/video in writing. Get a lawyer. Did I mention get it in writing?

postalmaner · 2020-04-04T15:46:19+00:00

It's an unfortunate situation. Some people have court orders for phone / video calls that specifically say that the call provider cannot speak--or so they've posted.

This is a very aggressive perspective, but treat her as another child. The same patience and tolerance you show for your children, is how you'll have to interact with her. If you can without being condescending, thank her for her input, and continue with whoever you're talking to.

Title	Video calls
Author	jpgtsi
Upvotes	13
Comments	14
Date	April 3, 2020 6:28 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/fudnld/video_calls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/video-calls.818377 https://theredarchive.com/post/818377

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