Your tips for getting: counseling, hobby, working out.

Throwawaysi1234 · 2023-05-18T16:18:57+00:00

I honestly just kind if did a shot in the dark on better help. Therapist was great, the service not so much (auto renewal on a monthly basis + each renewal is a limited number of sessions. If you don't have a session for awhile it builds up. If you cancel you lose your sessions and no refund)

I'd probably recommend trying to find a male therapist.

For hobbies, I did a mix of old and new hobbies. I started doing yoga and it has been a blessing. Kind of intimidating but surprisingly easy once you're into it. Meet tons of people, it's a taco fest, helps ease your mind and keeps my aging body from turning into a broken tin man

A lot of hobbies aren't actually good for making friends rather than acquaintances so if you go down that road then you have to take the extra steps to invite them to events where you could become friends.

As far as working out goes, you just have to make sure what you do in the gym is compatible with what you do in the kitchen.

I've been having problems eating due to stress so I can't keep up the caloric intake for muscle building. So I do mostly cardio.

If you can get the caloric and protein intake high enough, muscle building is likely preferable. Do compound lifts and schedule days for muscle groups like:

M,W: overhead press, bench, curls

T,Tr: squats, dead lifts

Make sure your form is good

Reasonable_Wheel_864 · 2023-05-18T16:26:07+00:00

Check your insurance and google for therapists reviews.

Lean on friends and family.

Volunteer

Buy 2 dumbbells from Walmart- medium weight. When you see gains after a month of consistent use - you will gladly buy heavier dumbbells. Pretty soon you will be ready to join the cheap local gym - planet fitness? Thots will follow 😉

donkeykong64123 · 2023-05-18T20:43:03+00:00

I'm in Ontario and you can hire therapist students(on their last term or something) for like half the price. I went through about 3 people before finding one that was the right fit.

I recommend a hobby that keeps you physically active. A lot of people here recommend the gym, but it's not for everyone. If you like walking, walk! If you like a particular sport, explore that! Personally, the gym and lifting kept me mentally sharp and feeling good about myself. Physical activity is underrated for mental health. Number one key is consistency and some discipline. Don't rely on motivation alone because at some point you won't have it.

I recommend staying away from alcohol. I was never a drinker in my life, and started to slowly rely on alcohol to cope with emotions and it got too much.

Turnt5naco · 2023-05-18T22:02:38+00:00

For counseling, I say try googling around and looking at folks in your area that sound like what you're looking for. Most will do a 15-30 minute consultation call to get acquainted and get an idea of how to address your needs. If they're not a fit, they'll usually have colleagues that may be a better fit that they can refer you to.

Casual adult sports leagues are a great hobby - it's another way for meeting new people, getting out, being active, and just a fun way to spend time. It's nice because it's not too intimidating. I did a volleyball league a few years back when I moved to a new town and it was a great way to get acclimated to my new surroundings.

As for working out, try group fitness classes. There's some HIIT studios, camp gladiator, and CrossFit gyms (I know I'll get flack for mentioning that one). I like the group classes because you're bound to find someone within your level of fitness that doesn't make you feel quite so isolated or "far behind". It also helps to establish routine and accountability, and if it's a good community everyone will be so encouraging.

Reflog1791 · 2023-05-19T00:27:14+00:00

Therapist - search for therapists that take your insurance in your area. Recommend psychologist instead of psychiatrist (just personal opinion).

Hobby - golf. Buy starter clubs and take a lesson. Try driving range. Start playing solo or booking tee times with randoms. Join men’s club if you like it.

Gym - ease into it. Start with 25 push-ups per day. Make it a routine. Then add 25 sit-ups. Then do it twice a day. You’ll feel strong in just 2 weeks. Then get a gym membership if you want.

GrimStreaker15 · 2023-05-19T20:09:08+00:00

So, let me tell you what's helped me over the past 5 weeks since I caught my wife having an affair.

I wake up at 530 every morning and go swim 15 to 20 laps. I take a shower there and go to work

After work, I hit the gym hard and put all my emotions into the weights, and leave exhausted.

After I get back home, I drink my protein shake and do 20 minutes of ddp yoga.

I have lost 40 lbs in one month and am being taken off some of my meds. I only eat one meal a day and am at 1200 calories a day diet.

Workout workout workout. That is my advice. I feel better than I have in years, and the endorphins released throughout the day are better than the best antidepressants.

You are worthy of happiness, and you should accept nothing but that. I believe in you, my dude.

Title	Your tips for getting: counseling, hobby, working out.
Author	Jigglytep
Upvotes	8
Comments	7
Date	May 18, 2023 3:25 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/13l220f/your_tips_for_getting_counseling_hobby_working_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/your-tips-for-getting-counseling-hobby-working-out.1219655 https://theredarchive.com/post/1219655

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