If most couples match each others "attractiveness level", if it was counted on a scale of 1 to 10, does that mean relationships is shallow?

Snuffleupagus03 · 2023-04-24T20:43:37+00:00

The entire physical ranking system of 1-10 is pretty much bs. That’s the issue.

Of course there are general truths about people being attractive to most people, or some people being less attractive than others. But the focus on a granulated rating system is wild and dumb.

I just don’t find the distinction between 6-10 to be a meaningful one in relationship happiness. The reality is that we are heavily influenced about how attractive we think someone is based on their partner. Not to mention things like makeup or situation or clothing.

There does need to be attraction. But for most people the grouping is far far larger than rp will admit. 6’s aren’t with 6’s. 6’s are with 3’s thru 10’s. And when we seen the 6 with someone we think is a “10,” we see that 6 as an 8 or a 9. Thereby confirming our bias.

StarTrippinn · 2023-04-25T05:23:10+00:00

I don't know why people are so obsessed with a rating system. I know that RP men are OBSESSED with opening because they are obsessed with the idea of simply having a chance. However, things that attract someone in the beginning, dont keep them.

Beautiful people get broken up with all the time. RP love to bring up Leonardo DiCaprio and looks (and age) might attract someone to him, but it didn't doesnt mean that he will stay with them.

Its sad that RP neglects the integral aspects of a personality that keeps a relationship going. Nobody gives a fuck about staying with someone simply because they look good. If you have the same values, goals, level of commitment to each other, laugh at the same things, shit like that will keep you together when looks wont

CptHappyOrange · 2023-04-24T18:25:06+00:00

Most people are not secure enough to be together with 9's and 10's if they're 5's and 6's. I've heard that very beautiful women will be approached less than above-average and average women because people will think that she MUST already have someone or that they just don't have a chance, because she's so obviously out of their league. Or, even if they land her, someone better looking will come one day and she'll leave.

Very handsome men will also receive the same treatment, where most people will think that they already have someone... or that they're a fuckboy because he's attractive, well kept and has an air of confidence around him. And, even if they land him, again, someone better will come one day and he'll leave.

So yes, most people will couple with those around the same level of attractiveness, which is a tale older than TRP.

KindlyPizza · 2023-04-24T18:34:29+00:00

I guess in the beginning, yeah. There has to be some kind of physical attraction. But then you knew them better, trusted them, shared special moments with them, so that when their physical attractiveness are gone (via aging, via illness, via fire + accelerant to the face, shotgun, etc), you still are willingly wanting to stay with them.

fathergoose77 · 2023-04-24T22:53:49+00:00

1) looks are subjective, so someone’s 5 could be another person’s 8. Similarly, someone’s 8 can range anywhere between like 6-10 for others or they could be a hard 1-2 for someone else because of some specific personal preference. Using numbers to rate attractiveness level is dumb.

2) lifestyle values, goals, and compatibility are far more important when it comes to lasting relationships, and those lifestyle values usually correlate to how a person looks. If a person values designer brands and expensive clothing, they will probably be attracted to partners who are similar. If someone if a health nut who values physical fitness and a healthy diet, then they want a similar partner; similarly, a person who likes chilling on the couch after work and ordering a pizza because why not, it’s Wednesday, probably doesn’t want to date someone who counts calories and will judge them for not prioritizing health. And then people who don’t judge each other for spending lots of money on cosmetic surgery/steroids will likely find each other as well because of their life priorities. It doesn’t have to be 100% aligned, but aligned enough to have a partnership/life together. Because of these factors, people will typically end up with someone who is pretty similar to them in looks. That’s also why celebrities often date each other - not just because they tend to be really good looking - but because they will understand the responsibilities and roles that comes with that lifestyle (most people with an average 9-5 schedule would not be happy dating someone with a celebrities schedule, similar to why many nurses/surgeons date each other). My examples were very simplified though, so keep in mind there’s lots of nuance to people and their personal values.

So if anything, that means relationships are LESS shallow because people are going for genuine lifestyle matches and compatibility rather than just some arbitrary number (and also why most people end up with someone pretty close to their own age ranges regardless of what RP spews). And the “best you can get” irks me as well because everyone has their own definition of the “best” based on their own values. According to RP, I can do better than my partner by dating someone much younger/submissive but you couldn’t pay me to spend my free time with early 20 year olds/teens, no fucking thank you.

Kurenai_i · 2023-05-05T23:38:56+00:00

People are usually attracted to familiarity . So they would be more confortable in a relationship with someone that looks like them . Ig thats why this generally happens .

Title	If most couples match each others "attractiveness level", if it was counted on a scale of 1 to 10, does that mean relationships is shallow?
Author	ilikelego1
Upvotes	7
Comments	23
Date	April 24, 2023 4:18 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/12xnxl2/if_most_couples_match_each_others_attractiveness/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/if-most-couples-match-each-others-attractiveness.1216684 https://theredarchive.com/post/1216684

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