Are expensive restaurants red flags?

So this Ted Talk caught my attention. (No need to watch, as only a small section is relevant to the post.)https://youtu.be/d6wG_sAdP0U

In it, the woman describes a first date nightmare. The guy picks an expensive restaurant, orders expensive items, then runs out before the bill. She landed with a bill of over $1k. Her month’s rent.

And then we have this Reddit post where this asshole purposely takes his gf (who’s on a low teacher’s salary) to an expensive restaurant and sticks her with a $500 bill to make her prove she’s not a gold digger after his money.

https://rareddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/jms4y3/aita_for_telling_my_brother_he_got_exactly_what/

Can FDS break down the nuances? It seems like you need to get to a certain level of trust before you can trust them to take you somewhere expensive. Or how do you vet these guys? Would a HVM be offended if you tell him you don’t want to go to an expensive restaurant while you don’t know him well enough?

How do you navigate this?

Edit: I included the Reddit post (where obviously she ignored many red flags) to show that example 1 wasn’t a one off rare occurrence to be overlooked. Someone in the comments confirmed she’s seen many Facebook posts complaining of men doing this.

Edit 2: thank you to all the commenters with your thoughtful discussion and being patient with my questions. 😊