The sun is shining as summer finally arrives and the Christmas carols are blaring everywhere I go, which can only mean one thing - it’s getting intense on OLD as we get deep into desperate holiday hook up time!

It’s the been the busiest dating week for weeks lately, I had four dates and turned down two due to lack of time, with three dates already lined up for next week too.

On top of that, old friends and old suitors have predictably popped up and as a result I have blocked three people I failed to do so with in the past when I was originally done with them. Learning as I go!

The Suitors

This week I am still talking to two people consistently from my last recap

  • Ken - 33, professional removalist. He’s just gotten out of hospital and is relieved to finally get home and heal up. He’s tentatively booked a date for next weekend, depending on his recovery.
  • Tim - 40, chef/construction labourer. Best date of the week 👌🏻 and very consistent with contacting me and showing ongoing interest. The surprise MVP of the week.

People who have left the rotation:

  • Simon, 37, restauranteur. Stopped contacting shortly me after our date last week. Deleted.
  • Peter, 58, creative designer. Never heard from him again after meeting. Blocked and deleted.
  • Damien, 38, Sous chef. I rejected a second date after meeting (see below).
  • Michael, 42, insurance specialist. Blocked and deleted him after first date for being a fucking creep (see below)
  • Cameron, 38, motoring safety coordinator. Haven’t heard from him since two days after date (see below).
  • Richard , 44, mechanic. I sent him a message politely saying I wasn’t interested and wished him all the best. Blocked and deleted.

New additions:

  • Jeremy, 36, the self confessed dork. A few too many Star Wars references that I don’t quite understand and I’m concerned about his intent on turning his house into a cat playpen (steps and cat shelves everywhere) but we’ve been connecting on OKCupid over our love of sci-fi and video gaming. Asked me out for a date the same day we started talking and when rebuffed asked what my timeline for meeting looks like and if he can call me one night soon.
  • Josh, 30, the sports guy. He messaged me sometime long ago before I found his profile. Outside of my preferred age range but sent me such an insightful message that I really wanted to feel it out. Matching on all our relationship views so far and share a lot of fitness hobbies. Seems really genuine and has expressed he likes to take things very slow. Very unsure of the age difference (I’m about to turn 37) so approaching it cautiously.

The Dates

Four days, four dates, all during one of the worst work weeks I have ever had. I am so tired and my social tank feels very empty today. Made a big mistake for agreeing to so many.

All the men organised venues close to my location at my request and they also all paid, two were very extremely pleasant company and I would see them again, two I couldn’t get away from fast enough. Not the worst odds I’ve had in a week but I wouldn’t book them all back to back again tbh.

  • Wednesday: Cameron drove to my side of the city for tapas, even more extremely handsome in person and very well dressed for the occasion 👌🏻 and he commented on how lovely I looked. Very chivalrous, opening doors, pulling my seat out for me and topping up my water/wine glass during the night. One of the best dates I’ve had in a long time with lots of deep conversation and laughs over pie incredible meal. He whisked away the cheque to pay before I noticed it has been dropped to the table and asked permission to drive me home to ‘make sure I got home safe’. Dropped me at my door, we hugged and had a kiss but it felt more friendly than romantic and he said he had to get home (1.5hr drive). I heard from him the next night (Thursday) and haven’t since. Not too worried about it as we had both voiced concerns about the big travel distance so wishing him all the best.
  • Wednesday: Michael met me at a pub near my house for dinner. He was already on probation for sex talk and he just couldn’t hold his shit together. Saw his true and very pervy colours when he asked me if I had ever been to/would go to a sex club and then started talking about his kinky ex and asking what my kinks are. I tried to steer the conversation away for the remained of our eating time and then went home when he tried to propose a change of location twice. He messaged me after I left about meeting up again and I blocked and deleted him.
  • Friday: Damien surprisingly found some time in his schedule whereas I thought it was going to take forever to spend time in person, so I was really looking forward to this one. Unfortunately he had to update me twice that he was running late from work and we changed venues as the originally restaurant was starting to pack up the kitchen by the time he got out to me. Once he got to the new venue it all started to go very very wrong - I found out the secret that he has an 18yr old son - that practically none of our friend group knows and also something else I completely missed, he’s an active cigarette smoker. Total dealbreaker for me. Other than that he was just very odd, spherically he couldn’t stop talking so either of us could eat out food. Kept choking on his food as he was yell-talking without chewing as he was eating, and he sent the food away to order himself dessert before I could finish. He asked for a second date before we left and I deflected to think of a polite answer so I don’t upset all our friends. He’s messaged me around his work hours but I’ve been asleep so we haven’t talked since then yet.
  • Saturday: Catching up with Tim was the best date of the week and the best way to round out the weeks meetups. Went out for Greek food and Tim took the lead and ordered a gyros platter and wine when I was unsure of what to order. What followed was two hours of excellent food and extraordinary conversation, the time just flew by and my face hurt from smiling and laughing. I said in my previous post that he wasn’t my type but I was just so comfortable with him and he does actually look a lot better than his photos. He waited with me for my Uber afterwards and we hugged goodbye. Haven’t chatted today but we exchanged messages late last night thanking the other for the date and looking forward to meeting again.

Insights

  • I don’t have the mental energy to do four dates in a row, I was exhausted by the last one and almost cancelled. I won’t set them up like that ever again. People at work kept laughing when I kept saying ‘I have another one tonight!’.
  • Who the fuck asks someone on the first date if they would go to a sex club? No, I don’t want to be passed around randoms or play Pokémon with STDs and collect them all. That question has made the top of my ‘inappropriate date questions’ hall of fame. Gross.
  • Potentially dating people in your friends group is tricky, I now know a massive secret that he’s apparently told no one (had a son when he was 19) and I’m going to be very tactful about letting him down about another date so I don’t jolt the dynamic with our mates.
  • You can have a wonderful date with someone, have a lot in common and no red flags but it still might not go anywhere. The first date with Cameron had me gushing the next day to people, but I had a very strong feeling it would probably be one-and-done. I referred to it as a ‘palate cleanser’ date as he followed so many bad ones this year and reminded me that truly wonderful men are definitely out there.
  • I’ve tired of OKCupid and I’m going to move over to Hinge for something different. I feel like exhausted all the good men on the former and I’m ready for a new dating pool. First impression - all the dudes are so hot! I’ll have to learn all over again how to sift through them as the profile set up is very different, but I’m ready for the challenge and already had a lot of likes and messages tonight to reply to.