Hey there, folks, sorry about the formatting, but I am on mobile.

Last night, I was having a FaceTime chat with my boyfriend, who I have been trying to figure out whether or not he’s a HVM. So, while talking about possible wedding planning, he said to me, “I’m worried that if I don’t live up to your perfect expectations, that you’ll leave me alone.” I can l understand how this would be a valid concern, but I also feel as though he’s admitting to the fact that he won’t be able to/want to give me the life that I want.

I feel as though I don’t ask for much, and then every time I do, and try to put my foot down, he acts like I’m a monster for wanting what I want. I’m currently in the process of unlearning codependency and of shedding my Pickmeisha skin, and while I know I need to grow, I’m not sure if I can grow with him, (but, it would certainly be nice).

There’s also the underlying issues of him being incredibly cheap, to the point where even when I go out and spend my own money on myself, he will complain about me being too materialistic and frivolous, along with the whole fact that I’ll have to put my life on hold for six years before we get married so he can get his PHD. I feel like I’m watching my life pass before my eyes, and the ski rope of life is going too quickly for me to grab onto without getting hurt.

What should I do, folks? I desperately want to be a HVW, but I’m still in the process of trying to break free from my goody goody image.