Facebook drama

Maisiebr · 2020-03-06T15:22:13+00:00

I would strongly advise trusting yourself on this. It sounds suspicious from what you're saying, but only you know how you're feeling about this. One thing is for sure: evasive and gaslighting behaviour upon confrontation is a telling sign that something is off, please don't entertain it.

quaintlyspoken · 2020-03-06T15:19:48+00:00

Time to go. He's cheating and gaslighting you, projecting his own on you.

It's better to leave and make him make an effort to have you again than to stay and go through the dredges like every other pickme.

But really just throw the whole man out.

leanbean44 · 2020-03-06T15:34:59+00:00

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Gobbledegook42 · 2020-03-06T15:24:40+00:00

Trust your gut. Your gut knows something is up.

leanbean44 · 2020-03-06T15:35:41+00:00

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Unlikely-Marzipan · 2020-03-06T16:18:59+00:00

Yep, I agree with the others. If he’s not already cheating, he’s planning to. You deserve more than this. It’s hard to get all the evidence we need sometimes to know for sure, but even if you do get the evidence it can do more damage to you sometimes, and also it’s easy to explain away when thy gaslight you more. Your gut is golden, trust it. This is very similar to a situation I had too, and I think I never even uncovered the full extent of what he had done, I’m sure there was more cheating involved than I thought.

2020-03-06T15:42:03+00:00

Let's say for the sake of argument alone, you can never know one way or another. However, all the signs of it are happening, at this point it doesn't matter if he is or isn't, because all the symptoms are there and you're being upset by a series of his behaviors.

It's like if you were like... I think I'm allergic to (food) because when I eat it I start getting sick. I'm going to stop eating it. And then your friend convinced you that you can't know for sure. So you keep eating the food and keep suffering the symptoms of the problem.

Where as you know if you stop, the problems will go away.

But I'll be honest, it definitely sounds like he's cheating. Women are often expected to wait until they have proof, without snooping, before they're allowed to leave. But all you know for certain right now is you don't like the relationship as it is.

You don't have to accuse him of cheating. Just tell him you're not doing the relationship anymore because you're not happy with it. Try not to go into detail.

boiledgatorade_ · 2020-03-06T17:53:20+00:00

I advise you read the FDS Handbook, and also "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft.

vimandvigourous · 2020-03-06T15:53:32+00:00

Please, trust you gut. It’s telling you the truth. He’s already have an emotional affair even if he’s not physically cheating. You’re too old for this BS. Don’t be a Pickmesia. I promise, he will not come clean, he will not change. Save yourself now. I know it’s hard, but a HVM doesn’t just leave for 3 hours to get dinner. Run.

okaybrie · 2020-03-06T16:22:46+00:00

Girl this was my last relationship to a T, only a bit more intense though I’m sure you’re leaving out a lot of toxic details on his end still. Get. Out. It IS projection. He’s gaslighting you.

My ex would immediately jump to how I was up to something when I called out his shady behavior. I would then, focus on fixing our relationship instead of feeling the hurt that he was putting me through.

It’s not worth it. It’s not going to change.l for the better. It’ll only get worse.

leanbean44 · 2020-03-06T18:00:23+00:00

He is 54 years old. 54.

You are arguing about him liking FACEBOOK POSTS. In age, he is older than three 16 year olds put together, but he doesn't even have the maturity level of 1.

Ditch the man baby. With a HVM conflicts like this don't even happen, because HVM tend to not spend that much time on social media, and they definitely don't like women's posts unless the women are relatives- and often not even then.

fuckCharDMacDennis2 · 2020-03-06T19:15:49+00:00

Break up with him. Both of you are too old to be playing games. He's either for you or he's not.

B_Project · 2020-03-06T18:48:52+00:00

Please don’t forget this when she dumps or is not longer interested in his ass and he comes crawling back trying to love bomb you. You deserve better.

MACMUA · 2020-03-06T18:59:54+00:00

I would keep it moving. He knows your gonna see this but doesn’t care.

Soulsalts · 2020-03-06T19:05:04+00:00

You've been together three years and you've never fully trusted him? You are too precious and important to have untrustworthy people clogging up your life. Get him gone.

Men are not necessary things like refrigerators. You can easily and happily do without one.

Reallocate all that time and focus that you've been giving to him, and use it to take up painting. Sell your paintings on Etsy. Voila, instead of a man and stress and humiliation, you have spending money, a creative outlet, and peace of mind.

leanbean44 · 2020-03-06T19:21:08+00:00

[deleted]

Title	Facebook drama
Author	leanbean44
Upvotes	22
Comments	40
Date	March 6, 2020 3:13 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/feetch/facebook_drama/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/facebook-drama.693307 https://theredarchive.com/post/693307

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