Found this in r/divorce

ishika_23 · 2020-07-11T02:15:53+00:00

[deleted]

dntbfllikeidid · 2020-07-11T02:46:56+00:00

Someone needs to bring that sister to light by letting her know about FDS!

ninetiesbaby16 · 2020-07-11T08:49:30+00:00

If she’s fresh out of a divorce I think her behavior makes perfect sense. I don’t know how long she was married but it seems like she literally has no idea how to be single or prioritize herself because she’s dedicated her entire existence to the whims of a male. Look at the way she phrases her question: how can I talk about my basic emotional needs without coming across like a vicious harpy? Her husband must have really done a doozy on her...

bluepisces1980 · 2020-07-11T03:15:43+00:00

I came here from that post although that’s not me that wrote that post. I’m newly divorced from a Narc and yea... it’s rough. Glad I found this sub though!!!

woldielocks · 2020-07-11T03:03:39+00:00

Sounds like she's on her way to a third divorce.

What advice is she looking for exactly? Why do these women tap dance around wanting to DO SOMETHING without actually doing anything?

She's fresh off a divorce, she told him and herself she's not ready, but here she is repeating the same mistake with a guy who lives a state away who she's never even met. I can already tell she's the sort of friend who's going to be bitching endlessly about her bf/husband like "Ugh I knoooow I should do xyz but I can't help it, I just love him :( :( :(" x 1,000,000.

--wellDAM-- · 2020-07-11T04:25:14+00:00

She’s self aware enough to know exactly what she’s doing, so how can it be that she doesn’t just stop? Cognitive dissonance?

Is she looking for someone to pour pity into her? Is she looking for that? pity?

What a total black hole of a ghost of a kissed by a dementor human. How can you just drift on the breeze and have no will or meaning or direction ? How codependent can you be?

It’s not bonding it’s false bonding. It’s he’s bored. It’s you’re a loser and have no spine.

How do you do anything at that point? Does she accidentally buy anything pushed at her by any salesman?

This is the kind of person who causes accidents at roundabouts by slamming on the brakes and waving people through because she wants strangers she’ll never meet or see, to like her and approve of her “generosity.”

Or whatever the fuck.

Literally have any self respect.

chasingxxsanity · 2020-07-11T11:04:10+00:00

She really does need to learn to set boundaries she set one and then didn't stick to it herself and now she's in this mess of a situation.

The men don't even have to ignore her boundaries she doing it for them.

Howslap · 2020-07-11T13:49:44+00:00

Let us list all the mistakes in this post shall we? 1. She was under no obligation to respond to RANDOM ASS MEN ON THE INTERNET. All that was required is she deactivate her profile. She needs to understand that there will ALWAYS be men on those sites and that they swipe on EVERYONE. 2. She understands she has poor boundaries and wants to work on that but in the meantime is allowing a stranger to love bomb her into dating??? 3. This man sounds like a textbook narc, she is in some serious trouble. 4. The dynamics of this burgeoning relationship seem familiar to her last TWO failed marriages.....that is a bad sign. 5. She needs to take a break from dating, focus on her self and establishing healthy boundaries. If she doesnt, she will ONLY attract low or negative value men. And will be well on her way to her 3rd divorce. Or worse, if she ends up with the narc he will slowly take away her remaining self worth and leave her a hallow version of herself. Sis should RUN, not walk to therapy

7102a · 2020-07-11T11:29:12+00:00

Therapy!!! And ditch the online dude, he sounds like a love bombing narc.

MagnoliaMirage · 2020-07-11T08:08:48+00:00

"I know I'm not ready"

Proceeds to further her trauma with self destructive behavior leading to more future hurt

LaBaronessa · 2020-07-11T02:52:36+00:00

Omg too early! she is so vulnerable and she absolutely needs to work on herself. You wrote exactly the same thing I would have.

BellaBadB · 2020-07-11T14:55:55+00:00

Texting is false intimacy. I hope she realises it takes months of consistent good treatment and actions from a man in real life to build a bond, not some texts from a stranger who's love-bombing her

Title	Found this in r/divorce
Author	Valkyrja1385
Upvotes	106
Comments	17
Date	July 11, 2020 1:46 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hp1omf/found_this_in_rdivorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/found-this-in-rdivorce.714191 https://theredarchive.com/post/714191

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