Handling rejection like a HVM. (explanation in comments)

-positivity- · 2020-06-29T14:38:15+00:00

Lovely note and a positive dating experience for both sides! I do this too, but only after the guy asks me out again. I send something like: “Hi there, I had a lovely time and you seem like a great guy. Unfortunately, I don’t feel a spark. Wishing you the very best and thanks again for the company!” Positive responses too, and some requests to be friends or to keep in touch (that’s just etiquette).

questionsaboutrel521 · 2020-06-29T16:56:04+00:00

I think that it’s dope you guys both had a good conversation. No blame, sometimes people don’t connect. It’s awesome to come away from a dating experience respecting a person.

Also, let’s not criticize queens too hard in the comments here. I think it’s hard enough dealing with the onslaught of misogyny and pickme chauvinism in the world. Nothing in this convo is inherently bad, and nit-picking word by word isn’t really a helpful behavior.

breadandbunny · 2020-06-29T16:58:50+00:00

I have never met a man that responded that way to my rejection. That's a unicorn right there.

heliodrome · 2020-06-29T13:48:44+00:00

I think you handled it well, but there is no need to say “honesty”, “honest” on your part, that’s a judgement he has to make. You only state your point. The honesty of your statement is implied. Whether he is HWM, we wouldn’t know. He seemed ok so far. The friendship thing was maybe he was being bored and/ or polite.

Pretend-Valuable · 2020-06-29T12:31:30+00:00

We'd met online, then met in person twice. Before we met for real, he asked me to be honest with him if I didn't feel a connection, and after the second date I was sure I couldn't see it going anywhere, so sent him this. (I'm green, he's white). He then went on a bit later to say he was so glad he got to meet me, and hoped that I would find someone who was right for me. We stayed friends for a bit, but as usually happens, we stopped talking after about a month.

FDSxMuffinVSrat · 2020-06-29T18:41:40+00:00

Two respectful people being respectful. Nice.

happytoll · 2020-06-29T14:26:08+00:00

Since he was the one that was rejected and he suggested friendship, does that mean he's hoping you'll change your mind? Or is he just hoping it won't be awkward when you run into each other?

If you didn't have much to talk about, wouldn't it be important for a good friendship too?

2340000 · 2020-06-29T12:32:09+00:00

He offered to "stay friends"???🙄🙄.... Nah, unfortunately that's not HV.

Title	Handling rejection like a HVM. (explanation in comments)
Author	Pretend-Valuable
Upvotes	326
Comments	34
Date	June 29, 2020 12:29 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hhyyp5/handling_rejection_like_a_hvm_explanation_in/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/handling-rejection-like-a-hvm-explanation-in.703690 https://theredarchive.com/post/703690

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