"I'm sorry if..."

gcthrowaway2019 · 2020-10-09T10:07:22+00:00

Call out anyone who tries to use this as an apology bc it's not. What's better is "I'm sorry I hurt you."

mynameisrominka · 2020-10-09T13:06:34+00:00

You know... I took a page from that book. After 12 years working in a male dominated field, I learnt how to turn their shitty sexism against them and then, when they act up all butthurt and offended, I give them the most heartfelt "owwww I'm SO SORRY you feel that way".

They walk on eggshells around me, no idea why, I'm all kindness and smiles 😊

VikingDotter · 2020-10-09T14:33:57+00:00

Or making themselves into victims after apologizing. I can’t stand having to comfort someone who’s done me wrong. If you feel guilty - good, you should.

pao664 · 2020-10-09T14:42:08+00:00

It’s not an apology if they put the word IF in the apology.
I ignore. If had a nickel for every time I’ve heard “I’m sorry you Feel that way...” 🙄

missliberia · 2020-10-09T13:08:57+00:00

I just don’t apologize if I don’t feel I did anything wrong.

jayohday · 2020-10-09T17:25:54+00:00

This. LVW friends will do it, too. I confessed, not long ago, to fellow women colleagues, that I had been sexually harassed by a former male colleague. He just left, and his going-away Zoom happy hour stirred everything up in me again. Then, when I went to lunch with these two ladies, and expressed I wanted to tell management (NOT for HR to do anything, as the offender is gone; simply to be validated!) they said things like: “Why would you want to do that? It won’t help you now.” “I don’t mean to gaslight you, but...” “Well, I’m sorry you experienced this” and “I’m sorry if I came off like x and y” well probably because you were BEING x and y — Christ!

ThrowRA745318 · 2020-10-09T14:35:38+00:00

I dont apologize unless I mean it, and I say what I'm sorry for. Because an apology is only the beginning of turning away from a behavior and restoring/repairing with another person. When someone comes at me with "im sorry you feel that way" I lose a little respect. Because it isn't about a feeling, its about WHAT YOU DID. So what did you actually do that youre regretful about and want to repair with me? I love a person who has the stones, the self awareness and the humility to actually own their shit and want to do something about it. Even if they're not sure what to do. That applies to friends, family, romance, whoever.

Title	"I'm sorry if..."
Author	ThrowRA745318
Upvotes	220
Comments	24
Date	October 9, 2020 8:01 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/j7uzoa/im_sorry_if/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/im-sorry-if.285879 https://theredarchive.com/post/285879

Comments