Thought I’d share a green flag. (I’m 29, he’s 31) My boyfriend injured his ankle really badly about 2 months ago playing rugby. He’s on crutches and is having surgery next week, so has been pretty immobile. He’s a larger man anyway (a prop, for any rugby fans) and we both love cooking and eating out, so a combination of the 3 means he’s put quite a bit of weight on since the injury. I tentatively mentioned this the other night, expecting a defensive reaction and some excuses, or accusations of me not being sympathetic enough, but all he said was “You’re right, I need to get a grip of it, thank you for being so honest”. I said I don’t need him to be a certain weight or suddenly start doing Ironmans and marathons, but I do need him to care about his health. He completely agreed with me ✅. I struggled with an eating disorder for years, which I’ve only just managed to kick in the last few months, and he said that the way I make choices daily for my health, not taking the easy path (for me: eating less and over exercising) inspires him to do better ✅✅

He’s been at the gym every day since, doing upper body weights, he has just asked to borrow my goggles so he can go to the pool, and he’s making us some lovely bbq chicken and halloumi salad for dinner. He’s booked in with a rehab physio for after the surgery so he can keep on top of it.

For me, a man accepting fair and honest criticism which is in his best interests is a big ol’ green flag.