This is what it's like in a HV relationship. 💖

i_am_jacks_dharma · 2022-03-27T02:25:36+00:00

Just to offer a counterpoint (or maybe a caveat) from my own experience: for this set up to have a chance at success, both "givers" need to have strong boundaries and self-love that are often the result of hard learned lessons that recovering from toxic dynamics with "takers" create.

When a giver is still acting from a place of proving their worth based on what they can provide, being up close and personal with another giver can feel alien and uncomfortable. The motives that create a giver don't necessarily facilitate healthy receiving.

Once I was involved with a man who was a "giver" - he was kind, generous to a fault...and also enabling with the people he was closest to. Our relationship eventually became punctuated with both his discomfort with my continuous self-improvement (specifically my commitment to sobriety) and his growing suspicion that I was "too good to be true."

Spoiler alert: I wasn't too good to be true, I just didn't take advantage of and abuse him like his dirtbag addict friends.

makeawomancum · 2022-03-27T01:36:04+00:00

Never settle for less 💖

raisininresin · 2022-03-27T06:54:01+00:00

This! My ex was the biggest taker I’ve ever met and I always felt strangely drained after our interactions. I didn’t know the reason then but now I see it’s because HE was using me and always taking but never giving.

Moral of the story: if you feel worse off after your interactions with someone, more likely than not, they’re a taker or a user.

sleepysiri · 2022-03-27T12:53:44+00:00

I prefer to be a receiver. My mere presence is giving. How many studies have proven that simply having a woman around (as a mother, sister, daughter, girlfriend, or wife) makes the lives of men much more fulfilling and happier?

Only in serious, strong and close relationships I am generous. Even then, I will always lean towards receiving than giving because women aren’t given as many cards as men are.

I think women should always lean towards being a receiver, especially in bed 😂

spicyspa · 2022-03-28T03:03:52+00:00

True. You don't have to think about it because its a natural fit.

MeanWhatISay · 2022-03-27T20:05:49+00:00

Absolutely poetic and absolutely true.

Title	This is what it's like in a HV relationship. 💖
Author	starsheepie
Upvotes	789
Comments	7
Date	March 26, 2022 11:40 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/tp7lnr/this_is_what_its_like_in_a_hv_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/this-is-what-its-like-in-a-hv-relationship.1110099 https://theredarchive.com/post/1110099

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