How to stop thinking about "love"?

Bourbonandcigars06 · 2021-02-25T03:45:33+00:00

First stop thinking that others will make you happy. That's fairy tale bullshit and over a few years will become miserable. You are responsible for your future, yup, it can be tough but its all you. Dont let getting horny ruin a good future

Learning to realize that others may not have same desires and only what you can provide for them in jewelry, free room and board, free vacations, eating out, clothes, celebrating everything

Realizing that someone else catches their eye then she can take 1/2 your stuff and move on. Now you are struggling

Entitlement is a nasty self centered bitch, a few exceptions exist but much less probable

Earlier you realize what reality holds, better off you will be and older you will appreciate younger good decisions

Irish-Fritter · 2021-02-25T06:16:43+00:00

Also wondering this, as a young MGTOW. We were promised a soulmate, a happy marriage, and while I am perfectly aware that this is not reality anymore, I can’t help but wish for that romantic ideal. Course, I’m mega-depressed, so getting out of that funk will probably help quite a bit. Ultimately, I don’t feel like there is anything wrong with feeling this way. Pretty much everyone did at one point. The trick is figuring out where to go from herw.

TheGoonbergReport · 2021-02-25T04:34:30+00:00

Get burnt by a few of these bitches out here. Everyone wants love, but you learn to be real guarded.

SS-CoCoNuT · 2021-02-25T04:37:15+00:00

Find a mission man and you'll stop caring about that fairy-tale bullshit.

Luisd858 · 2021-02-25T06:35:59+00:00

So no one is going to address the other problem he has of aggressiveness and drinking?? Fix that as well my man and you’ll be clear of mind.

Substantial-Dealer76 · 2021-02-25T05:15:17+00:00

Your love of an idea of a woman will never be fulfilled.

Khryn_Tzu-TTV · 2021-02-25T03:58:41+00:00

Reading about "Soulmates" and such is why I always mention read "Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi. Yes it's full of "Game" ideas, but it breaks down that "ONEitis" that cripples men and it peels that veil into how intergenders interact.

At age 22 you shouldn't be wanting to get married. If you need to, spin plates. You should be juggling a few girls ("Spinning plates") if you want relationships, but at your age you should be having fun and building your future.

Also once you realize that all women are just looking for that "bigger better thing" (Hypergamy) it'll really jade you, your eyes will be opened. That'll help.

SaranSDS008 · 2021-02-25T05:29:48+00:00

There is a solution for this: Get a Dog/Cat/Any Pet. They would unconditionally love you and don't expect much from you (Except that you need to maintain it properly and regularly, not a big deal for anyone I guess). They would make you happy and cheerful almost everyday. I Advice you to get a Pet.

coldvoltage86 · 2021-02-25T06:48:13+00:00

I'm starting to believe that the answer to this love problem, is finding a tribe. We're descended from tribes, modern men try to create their own tribes with women, which leads to all kinds of chaos and unhappiness.

I believe the answer to the love problem, fill that emptiness, us men need to join groups of other men who get together towards a common goal. That will fill that loneliness, at that point, women can be treated more like a hobby, and losing one will no longer feel like losing your tribe(an evolutionary instinct meant for survival, it no longer applies), just a toy. And toys can be replaced.

I'm looking into different mens clubs that I might join this year. Could be a gun club, hunting, golfing, moose lodge, sailing club, something.

Solo_and_Simple · 2021-02-25T12:01:07+00:00

I'd say a couple things.

First, it's natural to be stuck on the hope of love. Our biology demands it, our culture reinforces it from every angle. So that's entirely normal/expectable -- to be caught in the grip of hoping for the idealistic version of romantic love.

Second, it can help to deprogram yourself about this by reading or viewing Youtube content that focuses specifically on it. Rollo Tomassi's The Rational Male has been mentioned several times, and I'd echo that. The basic idea is that women do not love men the way men hope they will. They love men opportunistically, because they provide something for them. And their love is much more "detachable" than men's is. It is men who are the idealists and the romantics when it comes to love.

Rollo's work isn't the only source of this -- you can read/view about it all over the place (do searches); Rollo is just one of the first to put it into words: Men love idealistically; women love opportunistically. If you really let that sink in, it's a game-changer.

Third, it can also help to understand the enormous costs involved, in pursuing this idealistic dream of love. The red pill and MGTOW realms are full of that sort of information, so you shouldn't have difficulty coming up with it. The point here is that there is a very low probability of enduring, long-term success, and the costs involved in the pursuit are enormous.

I wish you luck. I think you're doing the right thing by taking yourself off the market for now. If you tend to get abusive and your drinking is increasing, it's wiser to work on yourself right now, rather than inflict yourself on women in relationships. That's a kindness to the women, and a credit to you.

ncubez · 2021-02-25T06:02:27+00:00

I recommend "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tommassi

SSStringer_Bell · 2021-02-25T05:07:06+00:00

Hey. Therapy helps. Please look into it before doing anything else

Cinemaguy1991 · 2021-02-25T04:51:39+00:00

You just need to learn to manage your codependency issues. I recommend lurking on the codependency reddit page. Some valuable insights there

BringTheFingerBack · 2021-02-25T06:12:21+00:00

Her job isn't to make you happy, you are supposed to make her happy. Which is impossible because no-one can make anyone really happy. Your job as a partner is to be the protector and provider, any love you receive will have conditions attached to it. All my friends have been married over 10 years and they are all struggling, it's not like their wives are assholes, it's just how the game is set up.

[deleted] · 2021-02-25T17:27:36+00:00

[removed]

Reddit1984Censorship · 2021-02-26T00:14:45+00:00

First of all get rid of alcohol its a worthy goal all on itself its very important.
Second understand that emotions are to women what sex is to men, just a way to get off, without any deeper meaning.
So to them you would be the equivalent of a whore that they donr want a serious relationship with.
A women should EARN your emotional attention in the same exact way you should earn her body for sex.
YOU are the valuable object in terms of emotions, status, wealth, strenght and so on.
Those are your male ''boobs and ass'' if that makes sense, the juice she wants.
So focus on yoruself on working on your ''boobs and ass'' to get as hot as you can and let them come to you.
The only time you should chase women is if you want casual sex.
If you want something serious she has to come to you.
(careful with goldiggers and parasites)
Im actually pure MGTOW meaning i dont interact with women at all at this point, but if i did thats what i would do.

felixforgarus · 2021-02-25T23:05:19+00:00

Because the idea of a relationship is that you have love yourself and you're looking for an outlet, a way to express it.

You do that by building things, contributing to society, you're alive, be like Mr. Magoo while you still can.

There are so many things you can do. You're pissed off at the world, write a book, start a youtube channel or something, go build, learn, grow, cook, study, getting smarter, invent things, make money, help other people, that's what life is really about, that's what love is really about.

A relationship can be great for a time, but what I've found is that the texting culture has separated people from not only intimacy with others but with being with themselves also. Dedicate your life to work primarily, a relationship should just be a side thing you can use to express yourself, but the whole texting internet thing scrambles the ability for it to be really a consistent kind of experience.

UnearthlyDinosaur · 2021-02-25T21:21:53+00:00

You’ll stop thinking about love once you’ve been treated badly enough by women.

BakedBatman29 · 2021-02-25T15:46:14+00:00

a man cannot be loved unconditionally unless its father for son or son for father or brother for brother.

Forget being loved unconditionally by any women.

you have to either look very good , have alot of money or status and remember this is not unconditional love.

markknife1 · 2021-02-25T16:31:14+00:00

First, Stop drinking alcohol to fill any emotional gap in your life.(beating an emotional demon requires you to starve it of it's source of relief)

Not saying you stop drinking entirely. Just don't drink when you feel bad.

Second, find an alternative to romance. Get a hobby, find circles around that hobby in your area, meet with them, and do stuff with them in the same physical environment.(like welding - nothing takes out aggression faster than beating a flat bar with a hammer to chip off slag and filler, just to see if you did it right)

When you feel romantic about someone, just remember what you felt in your previous experience.

dirtyhippie62 · 2021-02-25T07:54:45+00:00

For me I think about partnership this way: one “soulmate” is a ridiculous idea. There’s no god who made a perfect match for you and put her on the other side of the world and it’s your duty as a man or whatever bullshit to ride up on her in a suit of armor and live happily ever after. I think of partnership as something to stumble upon because there are many opportunities for it. You can build a good relationship, in whatever form that may take or for however long it may last, with many people in the world. You think god or whoever happens to put two perfect people together at the same high school and then they stay together for 70 more years because they’re soulmates and they just happened to land close to one another? No way. People build relationships with each other based on having things in common and being accessible to one another. You can find love, bud. It’s out there, probably not too far from you. You get out of it what you put into it. Maybe the reason you’re not finding the kind of relationship you want is because you’re self-admittedly abusive or almost abusive. It is so cool that you recognize that in yourself and acknowledge it is rooted in mental illness. My advice is to start taking steps to address your mental health and your pseudo-abusive tendencies. Then you might find one or a series of relationships that feel fulfilling to you. No woman wants to be abused, no human does regardless of gender. You know? If you start reforming your tendencies and becoming a partner women want to be around, the women will be around, I promise. You don’t have to settle down with one and obviously please choose your partner(s) carefully, a lot of danger can be done these days, especially in volatile relationships. But you can do it, man. You totally can. You don’t need to divorce yourself from the idea of love or having a relationship, just make sure it’s one that’s healthy from both directions. Make sure you are your best self for a woman and choose a woman who can be her best self for you, who won’t ruin your life. Be discerning, be patient, choose carefully. A good one just might come around.

alexaxl · 2021-02-25T06:48:59+00:00

Watch the roots of these issues:

https://youtu.be/OiRWBI0JTYQ

https://youtu.be/jltM5qYn25w

https://youtu.be/sPOuIyEJnbE

Many more from Skool of life.

Ideas, notions, Illusions & Delusions

reaper555 · 2021-02-28T05:15:21+00:00

Love is a delusion. You are reacting to biochemical impulses that are telling you to mate. We can channel that feeling into finding real purpose in your life without women.

Title	How to stop thinking about "love"?
Author	FuckingBorderlineMan
Upvotes	38
Comments	50
Date	February 25, 2021 3:08 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW2
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW2/comments/lrwjeq/how_to_stop_thinking_about_love/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW2/how-to-stop-thinking-about-love.801863 https://theredarchive.com/post/801863

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