I can't endure it any longer

NoHoax · 2020-12-14T09:47:09+00:00

Nah. It’s rough. I’ve been a MGHOW since back before reddit became the current pool of shit it now is.

Did the divorce. Dealt with the custody, dealt with the child support.

At the end of the day. It’s rough. Break you down daily rough. Yet I still would get up, and find new interests. I now have a love for mechanical and automatic watches, * and love YouTube videos on how to build a cabin in the middle of fucking nowhere woods.

I guess the point is you see the matrix you had lived in. It’s depressing and you call out to those around you to look and see the cascading of their own prison walls.

Experience let’s me know they hardly ever answer. Even after going through what may be worse of a situation than yours.

You can’t give up because then they win, we’ve lost too many good men, decent men who wanted nothing more than to be just that. Decent.

From a fellow Man going his own way, there’s support here. No homo.

akibjo98 · 2020-12-14T10:44:11+00:00

You should write novels.

Momisch420 · 2020-12-14T10:24:56+00:00

Excercise. Start with a walk around the sidewalk. Over a few weeks, speed it up to a jog. Drink more water, eat more fruit, get more sun.

Basic things like those will lessen the depression. With the strength you gain from that, you can attack the root of your problems.

Good luck on your journey.

turbocomppro · 2020-12-14T11:21:55+00:00

Dude.. you should write a book...

MRNOFUCKSTOGIVE · 2020-12-14T11:40:29+00:00

you're in your mid 50s and you're like this I'm 19 and I already feel like this holy shit

Solo_and_Simple · 2020-12-14T13:22:19+00:00

You sound very low. I'm sorry to hear that; you have my sympathy. However, my sympathy isn't going to do you much good. What you need is a way out of your depression. I have some common-sense suggestions.

Recognize that your thinking and attitude right now are a part of the depressed mental state you are in. They do not reflect reality -- they reflect your depression. That's important, because otherwise, you're in danger of taking your thoughts to be reality. Recognize that your thoughts are an overly bleak, pessimistic view of things. I know they may seem real to you right now, but they are not. They are distorted. When you are in a different mood, maybe weeks or months from now, the world will look different. For now, just recognize that your depressive thinking should not be trusted; it is not telling you the truth. At best, it is only telling you a partial truth, a half-truth. You're missing the other side of the story.
There is help available to root out depression. There is a well-documented, well-researched, and well-supported version of psychotherapy called cognitive-behavioral therapy, which has shown good success with depression. Find yourself a therapist who has good experience and training in treating depressed people with CBT. It should not be hard to find a therapist like that, since it is one of the most common forms of therapy around; however, try to find a therapist who is actually skilled at it, not just one who claims to be.
In the meantime, pick up some books (or audiobooks, if you prefer) to help you through your depression. There are many books out there. David Burns Feeling Good Handbook is a popular one, although there are many others. Use your time to read rather than ruminate on negative thinking, which can become a real trap if you let it take hold of you.
As others have suggested, get outside, get sun, get physical activity. Make sure you're eating well. Avoid alcohol and drugs. Avoid too much TV and/or social media. Avoid the news. Concentrate on taking care of yourself, boosting yourself up, filling your mind with positive thoughts and encouragement.
Do not give up. It's only the depression telling you that. The danger is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy -- by giving in to the hopelessness, you fail to exert the energy necessary to find your way out of the depression, and so you remain in it. Don't buy into the pessimism and hopelessness. Try to regain some of your fighting spirit. Don't surrender to this.

My hopes and prayers are with you.

Neutronstar-89735u · 2020-12-14T11:22:42+00:00

Switch things up! See if you can start a hobby or something. Might be hard getting into a new environment but this has worked for me.

Ok-Cappy · 2020-12-14T12:42:44+00:00

Your words reveal a certain sensitivity that probably makes you more vulnerable to anguish than a typical person, so I empathize with you there. But giving up is a bit childish. I know it is a bit trite but it often said that depression, in a way, is when your version of reality doesn't match the reality that you experience. - Your brain is confused, your heart feels lost.

As a few commenter have mentioned here, it seems you have a talent for writing. That is a gift. A gift you could develop to explore deeper than most can using just the power of words. I am sure you have other talents too. Please don't throw them away simply because you discovered that a few people you thought you could trust turned out to disappoint you. Move on from them. Turn the page.

floatonadoor · 2020-12-14T13:30:07+00:00

Alternative suggestion: Move to Thailand. Money goes long, food is incredible and women are all over the place. If the plane is going down hit the eject button and see what mf jungle you land in

captainblyatman · 2020-12-14T10:52:26+00:00

I am saddened by your words, brother, and embarrassed as I cannot be of any advice due to my lack of experience on the subject, but with words as pure as yours, I sure do hope that life will soon turn around for you. Good luck on your journey.

urbana1 · 2020-12-14T13:57:00+00:00

Hobbies and the betterment of oneself seems to be the doorway out of the shadows. I felt shitty for a long time. My whole identity seemed to be dependent on my wife and yet I couldn’t understand why she didn’t love me after all I’d done for her...learning her language etc. But reading up on the red pill made me realise how weak my mindset was. It’s taken some work to undo it but ever since I started focusing on my own improvements I care less and less about her. It’s taught me it’s fine to be selfish and make life about you! I realised that no woman wants you to put them on a pedestal because you put yourself in the default plebiscite position and get treated as such. When a woman sees a confident man with zero desperation she is more likely to put you on the pedestal in the rightful alpha position. The funny thing is the more confident I feel the less I care about what women think. I see a beautiful woman and think I bet she’s entitled as fuck. Who could be arsed with her trying to order me about just coz she’s hot. Fuck that! No one tells me what to do, man or woman unless it’s a job I’m being paid for and even then I expect to be asked respectfully. I sympathise with you man I do because I’ve been there, thinking what’s the point? All that work learning another language for a woman who doesn’t respect me. Well there’s another way of looking at it. I’m trilingual and currently adding to that. She may have gave me a love for languages but she’s not the reason I still do it. After all I’m the one who’s put the work in and learned it. It’s all about perspective. I’m fine if she leaves now. I’m always happier when her moaning cakehole is not around anyway. Who wants to be moaned at? I guess what I’m saying is there is a way out of this by changing your mindset over time. It won’t happen over night but read the rational male, read as much about alphas and betas and MGTOW as you can. Don’t let it make you resent women, merely just to understand how they tick differently to us. You can do it man! I was the simpiest of simps and I know I’ll never be like that again! Good luck!

Yasai101 · 2020-12-14T12:08:34+00:00

Reading your excerpt paints a similar picture to that of my father. Always wanting something from others, love, partnership, friendship when he has not learned how to do those things with himself. It's off putting and others sense it. Come to grips with yourself, learn to enjoy your own company and perhaps your depression will turn around.

TheRabid · 2020-12-14T13:41:23+00:00

We’re roughly the same age. I found that my life was more whole and complete once I got a pet.

virtuous_wizard · 2020-12-14T13:20:45+00:00

Stay strong. Do stay strong and keep living. Live is tough, but I truly hope you can find your own way, find a new purpose and meaning for your life.

ziv1990 · 2020-12-14T13:47:45+00:00

I'm also find myself down sometimes. But yet after some time passess weeks or months that feeling is changing to to other feelings.

What I'm saying is just wait and see that it will pass in some time.

Think about it like this. You can always "give up" but you can not always come back from giving up if see what I mean...

thejokertoker05 · 2020-12-14T13:55:05+00:00

You must move forward. Find new hobbies and new friends. Do things that make you happy. Some people just pickup and move to start fresh. Not sure if that's in your cards. Like any major life change it will take some time to move past it just keep pushing forward!

Rocco-AT · 2020-12-14T14:11:21+00:00

Same boat... but I lost my job as well. This was three years ago. I’m not going to blow smoke but it’s hard and depressing every day.... but believe me that it gets gradually better and you will all of a sudden find yourself a new life. It’s a different chapter but it’s going to be ok. Force yourself to get fresh air in your lungs and mind. Read books. Learn new things. Don’t be hard on yourself because you are amongst many men like you going through the same thing.

hotbiscut689 · 2020-12-14T16:06:29+00:00

This the exact reason why I’m a introvert I want to avoid this .

Bonesteel50 · 2020-12-14T16:14:20+00:00

Man, I know exactly how you feel. I've been betrayed on numerous occasions throughout my life and it really wears you down. I felt as you do for years. I still feel that way sometimes, but not as much.

Time and good friends will heal you my friend. find something to love that isn't a woman.

civcinco · 2020-12-14T16:38:19+00:00

Is this a poem?

thewindmillsofwisdom · 2020-12-14T13:48:33+00:00

Ever considered dolls or dogs?

casra888 · 2020-12-14T14:11:48+00:00

From within. Dig deep. To hell with those who betrayed you.

CoolDzlWzl · 2020-12-14T14:14:39+00:00

You need to talk with someone (shrink/psychiatrist) being alone and lonely sucks but you need to get perspective on life and if you wanted to go on with life what would make it worth the effort of getting up everyday besides your ex, start by liking yourself, theres nothing wrong with that, and if you need help, theres also nothing wrong with getting help, go see a proffessional they can prescribe some awesome shit, other then that...

You have 1 life, its up to you how you live it!

2020-12-14T14:25:11+00:00

Don't give up on yourself. You can easily make new trust worthy friends.

You are never starting over.. you are starting over with experience.

OrwellianHell · 2020-12-14T15:09:40+00:00

This may seem counterintuitive, but I recommend adding the notion of service in your life - doing things for others. You can do this by volunteering and helping the needy. It's a psychological fact that helping others can be a great source of meaning and joy. Further, it will get you out of your own head and focused on the external world.

quesoburgesa · 2020-12-14T15:21:44+00:00

Stop spending time working on your vocabulary and spend time working on yourself, I suggest wes Watson

mucahitkayadan · 2020-12-14T16:21:18+00:00

It's all C2 advanced vocabulary.

KaskyNightblade · 2020-12-14T16:28:21+00:00

I'm gonna give you and advice that probably will get me down voted but I honestly think that maybe you're not ready to be alone. I would suggest seek therapy. But if you're way to alone and want the presence of a woman, well you're on your own way. You can get a partner. Being alone is hard, I can tell my mind has taken a toll for being alone so much time. Dogs are OK, but they are not people. Hobbies can only do so much. But neither of these will replace the presence of someone you like around you. Take some time to reevaluate your situation. Remember there's no a wrong way to live your life. At this point you have probably realized that things just happen and you have to deal with them and endure. That's life.

StickyNoodle69 · 2020-12-14T16:37:03+00:00

I'd focus on getting on your kids' good side and focus on them and making sure they succeed. Isn't that alone worth living for?

Wioslarz · 2020-12-14T16:53:25+00:00

What you wrote seems really sad. I feel sorry for you :(. I really do.

I also admire you for saying what you're saying. I mean... there's a lot of guys here who would rather die than admit that they lack closeness ;). Sometimes I read those post and what I see is people posing "how much they don't need anyone anymore". Yet, here you are - a brave man.

What I believe you can do is to find a psychotherapist. I went through psychotherapy and I can truly(!) recommend that. Please google "Schema therapy".

In the meantime I would consider going briefly through "Primal Manhood Model" which can interest you ;)

Good luck!

PS
It would also be nice if you updated us with your situation from time to time, mate ;)

Impossible-asset · 2020-12-14T17:20:57+00:00

Comments locked.

OP, please understand that the description of this sub exists to build a subscriber base of men who are doing well by going mgtow. It is q life you choose.

From your post, you sound like you are in need to counselling and therapy to get your lofe back on track, but this sub is not a place for mourning things you lost and can't get back.

Pining for a wife who left you, on this sub, is seen as telling your doctor "but Doc, why can't i have cancer! I used to have cancer and now i don't and i'm so sad now." .....

I would refer you to a sub like r/asktrp or r/mentalhealth if you are in this deep of a rut. Bad things happen to good peolple and that sucks.

Once you get over all that, and you start doing better in life, feel free to post about that here. We'd all be interested to hear about how your life has turned around.

I will ask you to please not post any more about how down and out you feel or how depressed you are over your wife leaving you. It's not the direction of this sub. Sorry if that comes off as harsh, but to allow it would open the floodgates to every person who wants to post about some chick who broke their heart once.

Feel better. Get better.

Comments locked.

RobertTheGenius · 2020-12-14T15:06:56+00:00

bro if you want companionship then get on an app and make a profile. its the easiest way to met females. DM me if you need help making a profile.

GetGetFresh · 2020-12-14T15:45:23+00:00

Go smoke weed or something man

Altro83 · 2020-12-14T15:56:57+00:00

Seek therapy. Not sure this is the place for this post 🤷‍♀️ Knock her off that pedestal and get on with the rest of your days!

Title	I can't endure it any longer
Author	Mensa51
Upvotes	1
Comments	48
Date	December 14, 2020 9:30 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW2
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW2/comments/kcuifv/i_cant_endure_it_any_longer/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW2/i-cant-endure-it-any-longer.803665 https://theredarchive.com/post/803665