So long, MRP

2016-01-11T16:46:51+00:00

This guy never had a shot. Take a look at his first post - https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3oz7tw/acta_week_1/cw1qdlj?context=5

and just for shits and giggles, take a look at his last post -https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/3zmu5h/whats_gotten_in_you_youve_changed/cyntutz?context=5

grncld · 2016-01-11T13:43:29+00:00

This must be what they call a 'flounce'...

Methinks somebody went all red pill rambo and his woman bitch slapped him back into his place.

In all honesty, I agree with a lot of what he says but he must have missed the numerous mentions of "take what works for you, leave the rest". I think some of the MRP posts are a bit misogynist, but hey, a sub populated mainly by guys rescuing fucked up marriages is going to be, right?

Personally, I found some basic truths and the realisation that I could continue to plod along doing just ok, or I could improve myself and lift my marriage out of mediocrity by adopting a few strategies learned here. I still think I have a snowflake, but I know she's happiest as co-captain / 1st Officer so I stopped neglecting my own captaincy and we're happier for it. It may be denounced as 'wrong' but IDGAF "I'm doing ME".

Sadbeary · 2016-01-12T03:34:14+00:00

Supporting my family IS doing what the fuck I want. Ignoring your family is not MRP.

Redneck001 · 2016-01-11T12:46:07+00:00

You could leave, but instead made a big show of it.

You haven't left, you were never here.

BluepillProfessor · 2016-01-11T15:51:51+00:00

You can go back to your life of servitude but know this- you will not enjoy your steak.

Archwinger · 2016-01-11T14:36:34+00:00

When you marry a woman under a first set of rules, where she has all or most of the power in your relationship, and actually has good reason to want and use that power because you're a shitty man and a shitty leader, there's a very significant chance that when you try to change the rules on her, it's going to end your marriage.

She doesn't want to give you power back (or give you power at all if you never had it), because she knows you suck. It doesn't matter how much you work out, how confident you act, how social you get, or how successful you become. She will always know (or at least always wonder) that you're the same loser as always, just pretending to be someone you're not. She may never be comfortable giving you the power in your marriage, and when you step up to take it, your marriage may not make it to the other side of the tunnel.

The same strength and discipline that would have attracted her to another man is narcissism when you do it. The same confidence and attempts to lead she would have loved on day one is just being an asshole when you do it. Doing shit for yourself that you'd been doing since day one would have been fine, but starting it today is just selfishness.

Steveniii · 2016-01-11T12:54:11+00:00

Too much has MRP turned me into an total asswhole.

The Red Pill provides you with tools to owning your masculinity. Your inability to use those tools properly is what turned you into an asshole. A lot of guys just fix their situation and rarely post about it as they only post when needing specific advice on a specific area they keep failing at.

You on the other hand wrote a 'Farewell Letter' like you're George Washington. It's another sign of unmanliness. I would expect the masculine man to just leave. Unsubscribe and move forward, it didn't 'work' for you (whatever that means) so be it. Click unsubscribe and move on. This plea for attention in regards to your departure, womanly.

ignoring your woman (and family) and do just what the fuck you want, when you want it

I have never and would never do this. Where do you get this kind of shit. Building a life separate from your family does not mean you fucking ignore them. You could even make your family a part of your 'life' away from them. If I go to a Beagle Club and have friends and a life there that my family doesn't know about. I'd still bring my wife and kids to the cookouts so they could see the status I have in this place. My life away from them would show Husband/Dad still has it going on.

Acta, non verba.

Do you, good luck.

spexer · 2016-01-11T16:53:41+00:00

All the good ideas you bullet list there, I agree with - and none of them make you an asshole.

I take from MRP what I believe in, and what would help me. Most of that, like for you, deal with becoming a better man.

So when there is talk here about negging her or something, i choose not adopt that.

So.... help me understand why you are leaving, and making a show of it?

dandar4600 · 2016-01-11T13:48:36+00:00

MRP and TRP always say to take from it what works for you and leave the rest. In my relationship that means lifting, taking care of my shit, not being a pushover etc. It never was about being an asshole. The biggest thing about this was just opening my eyes that there is no Disney happily ever after if you don't work for it. Apparently you did find use for what MRP teaches so you're welcome.

alpha_n3rd · 2016-01-11T14:28:31+00:00

Of course it's OK to ignore her sometimes, but not all the time. Radio silence is a powerful tool and should be used judiciously. Balance out the alpha with some beta.

One thing is obvious; you are not outcome independent.

iloveairplane · 2016-01-11T17:20:11+00:00

Your making a quiet call for people to tell you "you're doing it wrong and here is what you need to do"

Honestly if you are being an "asswhole" (your typo), it is either in a good way (i.e. stirring her to want you more) or a bad way (i.e. stirring her to actually hate you and want to leave your ass!). If you are doing it wrong then you are causing her to hate you and I can see why you would want to do something different.

So why not stick around and figure out the RIGHT way to do it. I have 5 young children and I know that it is not appropriate for me to just IGNORE my woman and my family....that is the wrong way. There are ways to make yourself not as "available" to the relationship your wife wants while still taking care of her and the kids, all while showing how attractive you are to them.

Me thinks that you aren't demonstrating a level of attractiveness yet for things to start falling in place....so stick around and be open. Filter out the stuff that doesn't work, apply the stuff that does.

mrpCamper · 2016-01-11T18:43:58+00:00

Thanks for the feedback on your journey. My guess is the lesson here, if we choose to look, is to take a measured approach. I can't see how, on my path, these changes would be "tearing us apart". I only see improvement in my marriage. The only complaint I can come up with is not as much improvement as I would hope for. But step by step, I am improving myself and everything about me, including my marriage, is getting better.

jcrpta · 2016-01-14T20:52:06+00:00

Memo to newbies:

This guy has been on here three months.

Let that sink in. Three. Months.

RP is a marathon, not a sprint, and you have precisely zero chance of getting where you want to be in three months.

If you try and do it all in three months, it is almost guaranteed you will screw up. Partly because grown adults simply cannot change their entire life philosophy that quick, partly because those around them cannot process such a change. You're looking at more like 12-24 months.

2016-01-11T16:16:39+00:00

Sometimes what happens is that application of Red Pill, whether properly or improperly done, lays bare and puts in stark contrast for the first time what the real problems in the marriage are. I suspect that when TRP causes lots of friction in the marriage, sometimes leading to the end of the marriage, it's for one of the following reasons:

1) His improvements bring her shittiness and lack of improvement to the forefront. Her refusal to then work on her own shittiness and/or determination to remain shitty ends the marriage.

2) Application of TRP reveals that the husband and wife should never have married each other in the first place. Almost all the time, the problems existed before they married; they just glossed over those problems and married anyway. They're fundamentally incompatible, they want different things from life. Or they married for the wrong reasons. Or there was so little sexual attraction from the outset, it's so small and insignificant, that it cannot form the basis of a continued relationship.

TRP can't fix any of those things. All TRP will do is reveal them to you. TRP can fix YOU so that when the marriage ends you can go on to form a good relationship that works better.

2016-01-11T15:13:00+00:00

MRP: Here's a bunch of stuff that may work or may not work depending on your situation. Read it all, take it slow, and customize it.

You: These parts suited my situation. These other parts caused problems.

The only part you got wrong was trying to apply all of it. It can't possibly work that way. I'm glad you're developing some insight. Good luck.

Sadbeary · 2016-01-11T18:32:55+00:00

I think you just pumped and dumped us. OP, by your post, look at all you have gained from MRP!

Your life will never be the same. You may never come back to the locker room, but, you will never forget what you've seen. :)

You announced your departure, to say good bye, cause you will miss us! You just came here and took what you want from us, and now you are going to dump us? Such shabby treatment.

Seriously, looks like you already are way ahead of where you were when you found this room. Cannot know if you will ever post again, but the Red Pill is in your head. You are Welcome - and Good Luck to You.

2016-01-11T19:17:03+00:00

Tomato tomato.

MRP is a scale-able set of tools you tailor to fit your situation. I'm pretty sure we're explicit about that. Finding the shoe that fits. Finding the tools that work.

So you cherry picked the wrong tools for your situation. You overdid it with what? You just say : "Too much has MRP turned me" too much of what? Sounds to me like totally losing frame and not owning your shit.

Yeah, if my wife fusses about some laundry and I go dread 10 - 12...I'd be an asshole. Is that rp or me?

Not being able to differentiate can hamstring you.

If you found a few things that improve your situations : do it. If there's things that you can't do convincingly , then you don't.

Your submissions indicate a wish wash or victim pukes, butt hurt incidents, still taking too much of what she says to heart or at face value.

Some of this is a lot harder for certain personality types.

Baby steps, you're doing it wrong & give less fucks.

You can start with my comment.

Also, trying to just sow sour grape bloop bait posts on the way out is a good way to just piss a group of guys trying to help you.

You have inspired me to create a new rage quit icon though. Congrats.

RedPill808 · 2016-01-11T22:00:02+00:00

"Out of the blue" - my irony meter asploded.

The_Litz · 2016-01-12T13:39:20+00:00

OP, I have followed a few of your posts over on ASKMRP, and allow me to comment on the following, if you are still around.

Take note I am in no way a phsycoligist or medical profesional, so listen at your own peril.

I know a kid with mild Aspergers syndrome. He is a normal functioning individual, above average inteligence. What he cannot do is interpret other peoples behaviour towards him. He doesn't read body language, the nuances are totally lost on him.

From your posts that you made it felt like I was watching this kid. So far it has not disrupted his life too much, but he cannot go to a live sports game or watch sports at a sports bar. He was beaten up about three times now because he can't accurately guage peoples response to his ill timed and abusive comments. He just keeps going and gets rewarded with a pounding for his effort.

Seriously OP, take this shit from some random internet stranger, your posts raised a lot of red flags. Slow down to a huff and take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself if you are ok.

An_All-Beef_Engineer · 2016-01-13T04:05:02+00:00

'> Writes post full of yak balls

'> Says Acta, non verba

OP/ u/alpha_as_wolf Do you know what acta non verba menas?

Title	So long, MRP
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	8
Comments	44
Date	January 11, 2016 12:36 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/40glb0/so_long_mrp/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/so-long-mrp.200490 https://theredarchive.com/post/200490

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