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I hate the way she touches me

Teeafrog_44
October 1, 2022
41 upvotes
/r/MenSupportMen

(This is a personal vent, nobody will understand the full context or backstory but I just need to vent about it somewhere.)

We met again today and she was touching me weirdly all the time

Every time I tell her that I dont like the way she pets my back, the way she grabs my hips, or the way she touches my arms she always says "well I just haven't seen you in a while. I just miss you yk?"

I'm slowly starting to hate her

Yeah I get it, now you live further away and you go to a diffrent highschool, you might miss a old friend, but when I tell you to stop, you stop.

I hated the way you were touching me a year ago and I still hate it now. If you just like me, say it instead of being a coward. Touching a guy weirdly without his consent doesn't show you're confident, it just shows that you're a cunt.

And the way she said she feels bad for me is just... it felt so gross. "Well... i've heard what Amelia did.. And you know.. I feel bad for you.." doesn't hit right when you're constantly rubbing my body.

I don't want to tell her the truth about me. I KNOW she has a thing for me. She'll get angry and tell all of my friends. They'll abandon me. They'll make fun of me. They'll think i'm disqusting. But at the same time if i don't tell her she'll continue trying to get me to like her.

I'm just not intrested. I dont like women. I never really did. Just because I "don't act gay" or "dont look gay" doesnt mean shit. Even if I liked girls I wouldnt be into her. She's slowly making me dislike her, and myself.

I dont know if I should be ok with what she's doing or not. Alot of guys would be jelaous of me, wouldnt they.

Just stop acting weird around me

You used to be my friend, I dont want to hate you

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Post Information
Title I hate the way she touches me
Author Teeafrog_44
Upvotes 41
Comments 4
Date October 1, 2022 4:28 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit /r/MenSupportMen
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MenSupportMen/i-hate-the-way-she-touches-me.1208627
https://theredarchive.com/post/1208627
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/mensupportmen/comments/xsznvi/i_hate_the_way_she_touches_me/
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Comments

[–]akihonj 20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No means no except when men say it.

Sorry dude but you're going to have to be firm with her and your boundaries, try this instead though, say to her would she be happy with being touched by somebody if she had said stop.

When she replies with no, hit her with, then why do you ignore me when I said stop more than once.

If she doesn't listen or tries to wriggle out of it after that you're going to have to ask yourself if this friendship is worth the effort.

[–]DouglasWallace 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I dont know if I should be ok with what she's doing or not.

There is no 'should' in this. Some men would be ok with it, many would not: either way it doesn't act as a guide to the way you feel.

What is necessary is being firm. I'm guessing you don't like confrontation but there are times when you have to make yourself uncomfortable by doing one thing, to stop the discomfort if you do nothing. Set the boundary, firmly. Tell her to stop molesting you: use the strongest possible language for what you feel to get the message across. Make her realise that what she wouldn't put up with (unwanted touching) is not something she should be inflicting on somebody else and how she feels about the person she is touching is not what's important.

[–]a-man-from-earth 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If the genders were flipped everybody would be crying abuse and sexual assault. So yeah, that's what she's doing. Tell her and cut her out of your life.

I dont know if I should be ok with what she's doing or not.

Most definitely not. Nobody should be allowed to violate your boundaries, especially after having clearly communicated them.

If she won't respect that, then she doesn't deserve to be in your life.

[–]Arguesovereverythin 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If your friends leave you because you refused to let yourself get molested, they aren't your friends.

Tell her you mean it when you said you were uncomfortable and if she touches you like that again you will leave. Then leave if she does it.

Let your friends know you're not into her. They'll understand. Or they won't but you can at least stop being molested.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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