I’m an alcoholic, it’s getting really bad, and I don’t know how to stop

KnackwurstNightmare · 2022-09-18T06:55:54+00:00

Have you tried AA? It helped my brother maintain sobriety for almost 10 years until he passed away from the damage done by a couple of decades of drinking. Please don't wait until it gets to that point.

SunRaSquarePants · 2022-09-18T08:09:26+00:00

For me, alcohol lessens anxiety, but only while I'm actively drinking. The next day, the anxiety gets worse, and if I keep drinking every night, it becomes unbearable. Soon after breaking the cycle of nightly drinking, the improvement in my anxiety is so pronounced that I just don't want to go back to drinking. Many people have a good outcome using psychedelics to break the cycle.

TalkaboutJoudy · 2022-09-18T07:03:28+00:00

if you dont mind me asking, whats going on with you emotionally? anything you feel you cant express?

dudeness-aberdeen · 2022-09-18T13:12:19+00:00

R/stopdrinking

I joined Reddit just to try the sub out. Read a post or two. You might find some solidarity. I sure did. 3 years plus, sober right here, homie!

Alcohol is great, until it’s not. People will support your drinking, until they won’t. We have booze pushed in our faces on tv and all forms of media. It’s at every celebration and every party. It’s super easy to succumb to notion of drinking, every so often, if not daily.

I used it to deal with severe anxiety and social issues. It stuck with me. It took me 20 plus years to find something that worked. For some reason, talking to strangers on that sub worked for me. I hope it will help you. If nothing else, you won’t feel alone with it.

Good luck, friend. You can totally kick this.

Rolaid-Tommassi · 2022-09-18T08:03:46+00:00

As u/KnackwurstNightmare says, AA would definitely help mate. It's nasty addiction and usually masks an underlying cause that might not be apparent to you. I wish you all the best but please don't try to do it all alone. There is help available. Good luck mate.

AvoidPinkHairHippos · 2022-09-18T09:58:54+00:00

In addition to what others have suggested, I recommend looking into teas and herbal teas

I'm a big fan, as it is way cheaper and zero il effects them alcohol

Ralphyourface · 2022-09-18T15:21:17+00:00

I have tried to curb unhealthy addictions and have been successful at a couple. Although alcohol is its own monster, here is What has helped me:

being self aware (you are)
talking about it (you are)
not beating myself up over it when I mess up and indulge in the addiction, because i know that I'm trying to curb it.
surrounding myself with positive people who care for me but don't berate me when I fuck up.
being 100% honest with myself and others (seems like you are)

You're already ahead of the game by recognizing your weakness. Try finding your strengths and lean into them. Whether it's your work ethic, your personality, a passion/hobby, etc.

You are in possession of the most powerful thing in this world: your human brain. You definitely have the power. You have the will. It will all come together for you.

In trying to curb my sugar addiction, i also tried to not keep any sugar in the house, but I'd always go and buy fast food with giant sodas, regardless of all the great food i had at home. I understand the urge. I know what it's like to drive past those places and literally feel a disconnect between my mind and body. My mind fighting and yelling at me to not even dare turn into that drive-through. Sometimes, something as small as consciously driving on the farthest lane from the place would force me to miss it. BE PROUD OF YOUR SMALL VICTORIES. it's like a snowball; small good decisions will translate into a great big decision. Try to gather some momentum. And even if you break it and have to start again, you should be proud to have gotten so far. Don't beat yourself up over losing. Life is a fight, so pleaW get up and keep trying.

Try to do one good thing. Maybe have one less drink than usual.

I love you man.

voltran1987 · 2022-09-18T22:59:25+00:00

Man, I’m sorry you’re in this situation. My wife and I were in a similar one up until like 6 months ago. We worked through it by bumping back when we allowed ourselves to start drinking until we eventually quit. It wasn’t easy, but pushing back an hour at a time seemed manageable, and ultimately worked for us. Eventually we were able to skip whole days even! Finally, one day neither of us felt like drinking on one of the “ok” days.

No idea if this would work for someone else, but it helped us, and I hope maybe it will help you.

empathylion · 2022-09-19T00:53:36+00:00

I think that you are already on a start to getting over it but admitting that you're an alcoholic, thinking of when and why you're drinking and getting some help through therapy.

Look if you want out of this , it's going to require support and the more that you can get, the better. Groups like AA will probably be really good for you. It's worth trying before dismissing it. As far as I know, there's no religious aspect to it and I doubt that everyone in AA is religious. If not AA, ask your doctor or therapists for support groups in your area specifically for alcoholics. Look also on meetup.com and Facebook.

There's an emotional component to your drinking and likely an environmental and physical (chemical) component to it.

With that info in hand, ok alcohol right now is your anti anxiety ...( Which I wonder if it's true because you seem to handle anxiety during the day fine , unless you're drinking enough to be drunk in the day too) , could there be something else that you're willing to try to reduce anxiety a bit alongside alcohol ? No need to quit, just say replace a shot with a chamomile tea, or perhaps a breathing exercise, or a workout of some kind.

Environmentally - is it possible that you put yourself somewhere where drinking isn't appropriate during your drinking hours ? Is there a hobby you've been curious about learning ? Personally I've taken dance lessons and once I got going, that became an easy 3 hours a night at a dance school. Doesn't have to be that - the idea is just to put yourself somewhere where you know you won't drink or would drink way less. If possible, spend that time with some people who know about your alcoholism and they can help keep you in check. It doesn't have to be daily. Maybe one day it's hobby time, the next it's friends, the next it's a gym day, the next family, and rotate.

The last thing I'm going to say is that recently I read an article which mentioned a research study on reducing alcohol use and it said that what's helped the most is 1. informing people of the little known fact that alcohol is actually carcinogenic ( aka, causes cancer) 2. Ask people to count their own drinks.

I did read that you know it's very unhealthy for you to drink this much, but I thought I'd mention this because it makes that risk to lifetime and health a bit more clear and perhaps gives you something a bit more memorable to think of, and tangible( counting drinks) to use. Idk if it'll help but thought this info is worth adding to the toolkit that you'll need to get better.

I hope this all helps. Good luck man

Title	I’m an alcoholic, it’s getting really bad, and I don’t know how to stop
Author	Unnecessary_Timeline
Upvotes	35
Comments	14
Date	September 18, 2022 6:40 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MenSupportMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensupportmen/comments/xh9c0x/im_an_alcoholic_its_getting_really_bad_and_i_dont/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MenSupportMen/im-an-alcoholic-its-getting-really-bad-and-i-dont.1132624 https://theredarchive.com/post/1132624

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