More effective conversations could be had if both sides try to put themselves in the others perspective and try to not include any bias while doing so.

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-03-03T10:48:17+00:00

Removed for OP abandonment

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-03-03T06:51:13+00:00

But also, phrasing it as "both sides" seems short-sighted to me. When it comes to dating, every person is their own side.

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-03-03T06:49:24+00:00

I'm just here for debate. The bigger problem is generalizations. If I give the courtesy of treating someone as an individual, without trying to guess what they're like just because of gender identity, I expect the same in return.

TheBookOfSeil · 2021-03-03T07:22:09+00:00

You're asking for the impossible. People are biased toward themselves and some are just not very empathetic so they can't imagine how others feel, or they just don't care.

It's quite apparent that people are mostly focused on themselves so we're not likely going to get much empathy and little sympathy, if any.

vvvqvvv · 2021-03-03T09:06:17+00:00

And water is wet.

LeJacquelope · 2021-03-03T06:39:57+00:00

No woman of the human species will never put themselves in our shoes without painting us all as rapist entitled woman beating monsters. Never, ever going to happen.

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GYN-k4H-Q3z-75B · 2021-03-03T08:15:26+00:00

I think it would be a welcome change to mix up the regular bile spewing from opposing sides, but it's hardly going to happen or accomplish much. It seems to me that the goals and desires of men and women are increasingly opposed, which is a consequence of individualism and my way or the highway attitude.

What is more is that you can generalize what men want and get it right (rightish, 80/20 rule applies) -- but you can't generalize women because they don't seem to know what they want or need or it changes over time. How are we supposed to see things from their perspective when that changes in ways that cannot be explained by themselves?

Even if we could do it, what would be the result of it? You still want what you want and can't get it easily.

moviecooknl · 2021-03-03T08:22:37+00:00

Effective conversations about what exactly? Your issues in dating are your issues and also your issues to resolve, you date to effectively screen/vet the other person to see you're compatible (look, appareance, sexual chemistry, mutual desire, preferences, values, etc)

For the casual hook-up; looks, appereance, sexual chemistry and mutual desire is enough.

When it comes to a (serious) LTR most of the time it comes down to compatibility on personal core values and/or relationship goals; on these you don't compromise: ever.

Marty-the-monkey · 2021-03-03T10:01:47+00:00

From a science studies approach it becomes quite literally impossible for any individual to approach anything from any other position than their own.

That is a long winded way of saying that the removal of ‘bias’ is wishful thinking, and counterproductive to any conversation.

The ontological and epistemological implications of it simply being a matter of POV contradicts centuries of science philosophy and understanding.

Far more constructive is an acknowledgment of opposing views and acknowledging of the existence of views not held and maybe not even understood by yourself, as having validity when engaged with.

poppy_blu · 2021-03-03T10:21:50+00:00

Outside of PPD, there is no gender war. The irony is that a large portion of PPD doesn’t even date. It’s a comfort to some to believe this tiny little corner of the world matters and therefore my opinions matter and more importantly I matter, but the reality is that there is a whole world turning out there that doesn’t give a shit about red pill, blue pill, black pill, or any of the shit we talk about here. Is it perfect? No. But dating has always had its downsides or else people would never bother getting married.

TLDR The “dynamic between men and women” isn’t nearly as awful as most here want you to believe. It may be awful for them personally. Men and women do not hate each other with a passion as most here want you to believe.

Frankly there is a direct and laughably obvious correlation between the extent to which people on PPD believe their gender is being oppressed and/or hate the other gender AND their own troubles. Make of that what you will.

Anthony-waltzs · 2021-03-03T09:08:18+00:00

You are under the assumption that women are here to have actual conversations. Like I said before most women here have serious trauma and emotional issues that they need to seek professional help. Almost every single woman here talks about them being in horrible relationships with "narcissists" or "dark triad" men and getting used (it's easy to paint yourself as the victim on the internet). If all your boyfriends are abusers and keep hurting you then you need to take a step back and reevaluate yourself, we keep telling them this but they make it hell-bent on painting on all men as abusers and rapists so they can justify their arguments.

Title	More effective conversations could be had if both sides try to put themselves in the others perspective and try to not include any bias while doing so.
Author	NICHIJOU2411
Upvotes	0
Comments	72
Date	March 3, 2021 6:16 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/lwmzb2/more_effective_conversations_could_be_had_if_both/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/more-effective-conversations-could-be-had-if-both.752559 https://theredarchive.com/post/752559

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