The Other Side

Canned_Wine199 · 2013-11-19T05:15:56+00:00

I was fortunate that, during the time in my life where I decided to radically self improve myself, that I had met great people who taught me that you can be categorically successful in anything without necessarily fucking other people over. I've touched on this in a post asking for alternatives to RP or something, I had the great fortune of being shown how to talk to girls and command respect from those around me without the misanthropic, miserly mentalities that pervade in so many realms of men's self help that are gaining popularity and notriety today.

And there are alternatives, I've even made a post touching on some ie Mark Manson, but they're buried amongst so much shit like Return of Kings that just teaches their readership to hate more and believe there is too little to share and if you want any you gotta grab your cut before someone else does...I'm too tired to elaborate on this now and I wish I could make more sense right now because I want to really say something here...

All I wish was that people in TRP, and everyone confused and looking for guidance and getting it from the wrong places, is that you can learn to be good with women and command respect and find personal success, without holding any group of people in contempt, without concerns that there isn't enough to go around, without concerns of some sort of inescapable human nature that we must conform to to function, it's these things that upset me when I see TRP, and members confuse those qualities as necessary components of self improvement, when they absolutely aren't and at their worst severely hinder your self improvement. We're capable of more, I see TRP as a system of limits rather than means to go beyond your limits, and that's why I'm here trying to figure out what gets those in TRP so wrapped up in broken ideas that set limits upon themselves.

Katyara · 2013-11-19T05:23:31+00:00

Ok as far as the last part of finding something about the "other side". I've actually been looking for an excuse to call this one out. I'm on my phone and can't like but someone posted a pro abuse on males because someone asked if it existed. Now I don't vote in TBP but bluepillschool posted a "that's disgusting" and more that I agreed with wholeheartedly. I upvoted. So whomever they are from someone try to help a man recover from a disgusting abusive bitch and being told to 'man up' or 'what are you doing wrong' from all around him, Thank you.

Canned_Wine199 · 2013-11-19T02:35:25+00:00

I grew up a real scrawny kid. Shy, introverted, deferential, etc. I more or less feel as though I pretty perfectly fit the cliche that TRP is trying to describe when it uses the term beta male.

I was always smart. I was miserable for most of my life, but I was always smart. Good grades were the one thing I clung to, and for the most part it has worked out for me. I have one advanced degree, am working on another, and can no longer count the publications with my name attached on my fingers and toes.

Even when all that was on the horizon in my very early 20's though, I was still miserable. It wasn't until I got my body in order that I had any sort of personal happiness. Fixed my diet, put on some weight. Most of it muscle.

When you take up lifting heavy weights, if you do your research, you might come across this one fact: Let's say you make it to 225 pounds on your bench press one day. And you decide, that's what I wanted, I'm done now. And thereafter, every time you try to bench press, you just do 225 pounds. Over and over again. Same amount of reps. Same amount of sets. Even assuming reasonable rest and enough nutrition to maintain your weight: If you keep that up long enough, you won't be able to bench 225 pounds anymore. One day, you'll get to the gym, and it will be too much for you. You won't be able to finish all your sets. By not trying to overload them anymore, you told your muscles they could stop growing. And they did, and this is what it got you.

Life is like that, too. As soon as you stop trying to progress, you are regressing. The day you wake up, look out over what you've accomplished and think to yourself, "This is good enough, I can stop now." On that day, you are now worse than you were the day before. And the world will not forgive you for it.

Although it is not unique to TRP, this is something TRP certainly gets right, and is something that (in my opinion) not enough people have, even more so with each passing generation.

The blessed unrest that keeps us marching.

PhantomDream09 · 2013-11-19T09:38:25+00:00

It's difficult for me to be kind about TRP because it conflicts with almost all of my beliefs and moral viewpoints. I find the way that they generally talk about women abhorrent.

That said, I think RPW seems more positive, and far more constructive. I admit I haven't spent a huge amount of time there, but from what I've seen it's happily submissive women talking about their relationships and lifestyles without denigrating men. So more power to them.

OccamsUsername · 2013-11-19T03:20:47+00:00

I'm personally glad this sub, and its subscribers, are who they are. Each is reasonable or interested enough to (ideally, but not always) contribute constructively to the discussion of some fairly complex topics, as well as heated personal opinions. I do find extremists on either side to be fairly distasteful, and I have felt the sort of scorn and judgment /u/PhantomDream09 talks about in her post by identifying with the core tenants of Redpill philosophy. BUT, as a bold, self absorbed, dark triad, DGAF alpha male, my skin is simply too thick to care or notice. Biotruth.

[deleted] · 2013-11-19T18:23:00+00:00

[permanently deleted]

lokidemon731 · 2013-11-19T05:59:37+00:00

It's hard to say what I like about TRP because I disagree with much of it personally and some of it I find outright distasteful. However there are a great deal of users that I have come to recognize and find very agreeable. You and /u/OccamsUsername are two such users, and there are certainly others. I think your SO is a good example of the type of RP man I would get along with. I've seen him defend the idea that a true RP man does not lash out in anger or violence, and he's respectful of other people's choices. There are many TRP users who are like this, who respect personal choice and women, while still respecting and looking out for themselves.

As for RPW, I think it's a completely different world from TRP. RPW doesn't seem as adament about their way or the highway. Additionally, a main premise of the sub is for women to build up their partners(as opposed to what appears to be a main premise of TRP: to show that bitches ain't shit but tricks and hoes). Therefore, there's a lot less animosity and less potential for hateful commentary.

I think that if TRP was just a haven for people who were striking out with the ladies and needed advice or for people who want a more traditional lifestyle, I would be ok with that, as long as they could respect that it's not for me and may not be right for a lot of people.

mrsamsa · 2013-11-19T07:17:28+00:00

I've been racking my brain trying to think of some aspect of RP that I agree with, and I think this is probably the best thing I can come up with. I can agree and empthasise with the idea that men should not aim to be a doormat in a relationship, putting a woman on a pedestal for simply being female, or that they should have to put up with shit just because they are a man. Importantly, I accept that a lot of women can be really shitty to men and when this happens to a guy, it can hurt.

I even ended up accepting a lot of beliefs that RP accepts (innate differences of men and women, feminism is stupid, men should be dominant, the problem with society is the demise of the traditional marriage, etc), to the point where I'd be checking a blog called "Girls Suck" or something similar, which was run by 5 nerdy guys chronicling their personal experiences with being treated badly by women and their inability to understand how this mysterious mind of the feeemale works.

I guess I didn't become a full card carrying red piller for two main reasons: 1) I grew up, and 2) I learnt about science. Once I learnt that women aren't a completely different species that need to be "figured out", it became impossible to continue holding the ridiculous beliefs about them - like them being entitled princesses who are so lucky to have guys hitting on them all the time when I had to work hard to get a girl.

Sometimes I can just relax and enjoy the pseudoscience and ridiculousness of TRP because I'm content in thinking that they're just dumb kids like I was. But then I realise that some of the members aren't teenagers, and it pisses me off that such ignorant people can make it to adulthood.

Fuck. Not completely positive, but I tried.

PhantomDream09 · 2013-11-19T09:15:29+00:00

BOTH sides have extremes that can be off-putting to the general middle, and there are a wide range of definitions of what it means to be BluePill and RedPill.

I am probably one of those extremes. I get downvoted in TRP for some of my shit. But even I admit that my way is not for everyone. I'm just sharing personal experiences and opinions.

Vault91 · 2013-11-19T11:23:30+00:00

look this just isn't going to happen

Bluepill and Redpill are not both sides of the same coin with sound arguments on eather side

one side if filled with metal patients screaming about their own version of events...the other on the other side of the two way mirror are those laughing at them

I know this sounds dickish and mean but sometimes "hey can't we find common ground?" just doesn't work.....not all viewpoints are equal

alphabetmod · 2013-11-19T05:36:25+00:00

I like posts like this. They're a breath of fresh air.

"Nothing shall I, while sane, compare with a friend" - Homer

I try to remember that quote as much as possible in this sub. The grass is always browner seems to be the general theme here. OP, you and your husband? boyfriend? whatever, seem like you guys have it figured out. Good for you.

Title	The Other Side
Author	PhantomDream09
Upvotes	11
Comments	105
Date	November 19, 2013 2:00 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1qy06a/the_other_side/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-other-side.286593 https://theredarchive.com/post/286593

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