Weekly Self-Reflection Thread: 05/09/2016

Sunhappy_DC · 2016-05-10T00:46:52+00:00

1. What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made!

I lost a pound! Super happy with myself. I am hoping that eventually this monthly water weight drops and I figure out what my actual weight is.

2. What still needs work?

I need to really get on the weight loss train. I am tired of being in the 120s or high 110s. I want to be 110 lbs and svelte. I'm just trying to focus without going extreme again. I have a tendency to do this.

3. Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it?

I am worried I'm falling into obsessive eating habits again. Just being mindful. Also, my boyfriend is military and there's a chance he may get restationed in the near future so that's been on my mind. Since it's a maybe, I'm just staying in the moment and enjoying my time with him. He's so wonderful.

4. How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? (or family, friends, etc)

I helped him with fixing his car (I held the thing!) and while I was a terrible assistant since I don't know shit about cars, but I really enjoyed helping out and he appreciated my weak assistance nonetheless!

5. What was one special moment you had this week?

My boyfriend rested his head on my chest and we cuddled for maybe....10 minutes. For nothing :V It was legit lovely.

6. Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them!

Lose a pound.
Look into new planners for this year. I'm so over Erin Condren and I need more modules for my lists :V
Consider getting a car.

fluorescentbunny · 2016-05-10T08:53:53+00:00

What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made!

I lost weight, yay! I'm still quite far from my goal, but every kilo is progress! Also, I've been lifting weights with my boyfriend for a while now, and this weekend I managed to bench press 35 kg!! Sooo proud of myself :) And also really happy with the encouragement my bf gives me in the gym

What still needs work?

I still have quite a lot to lose, at least 16kg, and I'd really like to improve my lifts even more. Also, I feel like I am becoming a bit obsessive with counting macros and MFP etc, which makes me enjoy eating a lot less. But, I'm going out for dinner tonight with my boyfriend so that'll be a good start to combine my calorie goal with real life I guess.

Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it?

Last week, my boyfriend said something like "I don't think I'llbe in a relationship in 5 years". This was pretty shocking for me to hear, because I thought we were pretty good and have been together for almost 2 years now in an exclusive relationship etc. I didn't want to go into it too much when he said it, but it just kept going through my mind and so yesterday I asked him about it, and he said that he really likes spending time with me and that as long as he likes it we're good, but that he thought that he would become very busy once he started his own company, and that he just wanted to do whatever he wants at that time. And also, that I probably wouldn't like it if he were to spend less time with me, and that I thinks I'm not always honest with him and he really hates that (and it's true, it really is my worst habit ever). So yeah, that really has/had me worried, and looking back I kind of feel like it maybe was a comfort test from my side but I'm not sure...? Anyway, after that conversation I was kind of down but tried to hide it a bit, but he was really sweet and yesterday night when he called me he even said he loved me over the phone when saying good bye, even though he normally NEVER says that over the phone, only on special occasions in real life. So that calmed me down a bit, but I'm still not really sure how serious he takes our relationship. For reference: I'm 20 and he's 21, and we've been together for almost 2 years. Do any of you lovely ladies have any advise for me on how to handle this situation, or am I just overreacting and listening to my hamster too much?

How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? (or family, friends, etc)

When we saw eachother yesterday we hadn't seen eachother for almost a week, which is really rare for us, so we couldn't keep our hand off of eachother :)

What was one special moment you had this week?

When he called and said I love you as a good bye over the phone. First time he ever did that! Also, I asked him if it was okay to call his mother for mothersday, and he said of course and even encouraged me to also call his grandmother!!

Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them!

Continue losing weight
Going to the gym to lift at least 3 times a week
Working on my honesty and avoiding little white lies
Adding more value to my boyfriends life

fluorescentbunny · 2016-06-02T12:19:17+00:00

Hello ladies /u/panthomdream09, /u/kittenkajira, and /u/beautifulspacecadet, I said I would let you know if anything happened and keep you up to date, so here is a little update. Unfortunately my boyfriend broke up with me a little over a week ago. I had not made up my mind yet at all, and was actually thinking of setting a deadline for myself somewhere at the end of the summer, but he had other plans. For now I think I will just focus on improving myself in various ways and lurking some more on this sub for inspiration :)

littleteafox · 2016-05-10T15:26:03+00:00

What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made! I lost about .8lbs! Also, another successful week of lowering my starbucks calories. No more grande soy chais. When workfriend and I go out for our break I've been sticking to black/green iced/hot teas and then friday I get a small chai as my reward, soon to be phased out altogether. I also started running again on my treadmill which my sore calves can attest to. I have been tracking cals more consistently though it has been much harder to do on the weekends. I purchased a new perfume that I'm really digging - The Nest's Midnight Fleur. Does not smell like general alcohol-y perfume at all! I got the roller ball size. I also got some samples coming in from Demeter that I'm looking forward to trying.
What still needs work? I still need to keep an eye on my sugar intake, and lower carbs in favor of more protein. Drink more water. Organize my life a little better.
Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it? Starting to feel a little nitpicky/emotional and I don't know why. For now I plan to just give it a week and see how I feel, spend more quality time with the SO, try to listen to my intuition (it's always hard for me to know what's my intuition vs. what's me just worrying or being negative)
How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? (or family, friends, etc) I helped SO clean out his attic as part of his reno process. We're working on flipping his house so it's going to be a long summer :)
What was one special moment you had this week? While at a red light SO pulled me in for a really nice kiss, my favorite kind where he gently grabs the base of my head/hair. We also spent mother's day together at his mom's house and picked out presents for her together.
Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them! Figure out what my doubts are about. Work on building a personal/life planner (I really really want a kikki.k one but they are expensive and I am not sure how likely I am to stick with planning on paper, so I figure it would make more sense to DIY one to test the water. I found a video about it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kEImD-qGJwY

CoochQuarantine · 2016-05-10T18:43:48+00:00

What did you improve from last week?

I took some time to CTFO. I realized I am not superwoman and I got back into a semi normal routine so I could take care of my man.

What still needs work?

Diet. UGH. I got back on Keto yesterday. So I hope I stick with it. I also started p90x again because I wanted a change from the daily yoga routine. I'll go back to it after I'm done with this session but for now.... work on eating habits.

Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it?

Work is still crazy. I am stressed about it but I am wokring on creating a better work/life balance.

How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? (or family, friends, etc)

So I went food shopping to make sure he has lunch for the week. A day late but whatever. I got there.

What was one special moment you had this week?

I asked my SO what time he had to be out the door so that I could have his lunch ready for him. He just looked at me and said "You take such good care of me". I didn't think I was doing much more than just making lunch for him but he really appreciates it and if felt great that he said that to me.

Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them!

Eat right. I planned my meals so I should be ok.
Exercise right. Got that planned out so I should be ok.
Actually get this one piano piece I have been working on but can't seem to get the timing of one part down but I think I've got it. I will practice practice practice.
I need to find someone to practice my french with. Not sure if I can do that this week but it is on my radar as something I would like to do.

starista · 2016-05-10T22:43:24+00:00

What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made!

Meal planning and more importantly -- following through on preparing, eating, and cleaning up after said meals!

What still needs work?

The amount of time I spend surfing the internet while I could be talking with my husband

Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it?

Sore throat -- all of my students in my class are sick! Going to bed early to help!

How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? (or family, friends, etc)

I have been doing more chores around the house that my husband usually would do. It's made him smile!

What was one special moment you had this week?

Hearing "Thank you" from my husband.

Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them!

I would like to stop playing online video games. It's a huge waste of time and I do not think it does anything to help my marriage, or any relationships for that matter.

elegance_ · 2016-05-11T12:23:13+00:00

1. What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made! I can have trouble expressing my feelings sometimes - causing me to bottle up everything, unless I feel very strongly about it. I did really well at communicating my uneasiness about something to my SO. I brought the matter to his attention in a calm fashion and expressed my concerns, as well as what I do appreciate about him.

Living healthily has been going well and I am proud to say that I am transitioning to a vegan lifestyle, with the blessing of my 'omni' SO. (Writing this down, I think I should really do something special for him to show him how grateful I am. Veganism could easily be a dealbreaker!)

2. What still needs work? Quality time in the evening. Basically, I should get off the computer and cuddle more.

3. Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it? I had a few hamstery days last week during which I began questioning the relationship. I think I was 'getting comfortable' - but was also, luckily, quickly reminded that I need to stay humble and be grateful that the universe brought us together, because, wow, we are such a great team. We're growing as a couple and I am so glad to watch our story unfold!

I've also started journaling, which is a neat way to write off anxious thoughts upon which I otherwise keep dwelling.

4. How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? I am supporting my SO who is considering a career change. We've been talking a lot and he has expressed that sharing his thoughts and having my feedback has helped him tremendously

5. What was one special moment you had this week? Deciding to go vegan - and have my SO support me

6. Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them! Keep on doing all these healthy things that make me happy, spend more quality time with my SO and less on the computer, get into the habit of journaling

fhigurethisout · 2016-05-09T22:58:37+00:00

1. What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made!

Exercise! I worked out six out of seven days this week. I also improved the bachelorette mode issue I was having and felt a million times better overall. I also didn’t waste much time online and worked really hard. I think I improved everything I was really disappointed with last week!

What still needs work? - I was thinking about how horrible I am with time management. I am guilty of telling my partner “I’ll be there at [x] time” and end up being late. It really isn’t on purpose, I just don’t calculate how much time I actually need to get ready, get gas, prep food, yadada. I know it irritates him, so I’ve been practicing leaving earlier and being more timely with smaller tasks. I really don’t want to screw up when he gets back, it annoys me when I do that to him (and him obviously lol).

3. Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it?

Yeah. Affording life! Lol. My budget is so tight I find myself re-calculating and stressing quite a lot, esp after learning how much I owe in taxes. I almost bought a protein shake after the gym today and had to use all my willpower to tell myself NO. I absolutely cannot buy food (other than groceries) until I get used to paying my mortgage and bills etc. I plan on dealing with this by exerting my self-control and continuing to log my spending daily.

(backstory: moved out late last year, recently became owner of apartment.. so I'm quite new to all this lol)

I am also troubled by my partner wanting to travel with me in the summer (at least a month). I want to be the girlfriend who says yes. So I've said yes. I don't want to hold us back. But...I seriously don’t know how I’m going to pull it off unless I can secure a better contract ASAP. That would actually be the best solution, because then I could do some work while we travel and pay for it on the go. So I suppose the goal here is to practice improving my skill-set and then ask for more money or apply to other jobs!! to be honest, I do have savings. But I'll be left with next to nothing if I use it to travel. :/ Should I just say f*** it and use some savings if I have to? It's just engrained in me that I need to have savings for emergencies or I'm just being foolhardy. And it already depresses me that I don't have enough saved in general...

4. How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? (or family, friends, etc) - I feel like I haven’t done enough on this front. Work has just consumed me completely. I text him daily though (he’s on a fishing trip with barely any connection), but I don’t think I’ve been annoying! I’m really proud of myself for not falling onto the anxiety train while he’s been away.

5. What was one special moment you had this week? - Pushing a project to its fullest potential and being happier with it. Also realizing that my partner is seriously amazing. Whenever he sends me a picture of himself fishing and talks about all the outdoorsy stuff he’s doing, it makes me so happy. I love the outdoors and I feel so lucky to have a guy that’s into it!

6. Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them! - Exercise 7 days this week - continue taking vitamins, eat healthy - keep logging spending, pls don't spend unnecessarily - be on top of your time management by leaving at least fifteen minutes earlier than you assume you should -

whew....yep a bit stressed out :D

eliza_schuyler · 2016-05-09T23:54:00+00:00

Thank you /u/fhigurethisout! I love reading everyone's progress, and checking my own!

What did you improve from last week? Write down any achievements or progress you’ve made! This week I have managed to get a bunch more meals prepped for quick cooking when I get home from work. I've also exercised almost every day this week, which makes my SO super happy. I'm thin, but not fit, but that's going to change!

What still needs work? I'm aiming for 7/7 dinners cooked this week. No more cheats!

Is there anything troubling you? How do you plan on dealing with it? Life is actually going pretty well. Obviously the usual study and work issues, to which the solution is just keep swimming, but other than that I am pretty content with the way things have been this week.

How have you added value in your partner’s life in this past week? I've made an effort to exercise with him (read: skip and do body weight exercises while he lifts!) which I know he likes. I've been keeping up with household chores, making a few good meals (and a few hastily put-together ones!) and looking after some of his responsibilities when I have free time. He's super happy. I think this RPW business might actually work ;)

What was one special moment you had this week? I have been studying and working a lot this week, and had to spend Saturday morning helping my family out with an unenjoyable job. I didn't wake up in the best of moods, as I just wanted to stay in bed with him! Saturday is our time! But he made me a cup of tea and held me while I woke up and was so sweet and kind. He said he'd miss me while I was out!

Write down your goals this week, as well as how you plan to tackle them! Goals are: hot dinner 7/7 nights. Exercise 7/7 days. Study more efficiently so I am more available when he is home.

KlaiFrai · 2016-05-10T02:38:19+00:00

SO has been studying super hard for an entrance exam to his dream job for the past two weeks, and so I've been staying out of his office except to bring him tea or snacks.

There's a lot more details to the situation, and I've probably got enough for a field report after the exam, so for now I'll just say that I learned I talk so much that I was highly uncomfortable with shutting up for a few days, and ended up spilling onto the IRC so as not to bug SO. On the one hand, we're both heavy conversationalists, my husband loves talking about the news, history, jet engines, biology, etc, for hours with me and loves to bounce ideas back and forth. On the other hand, I realized that a lot of what I wanted to talk about this week was logistics and worries about situations that weren't even guaranteed to transpire yet, definitely not fun conversation material for him. He really wouldn't care that I had researched his potential job's city and now know the climate, housing costs, and museums in the area. If anything, that would put undue stress on him to succeed. That kind of info can wait until he starts that conversation.

Upon further reflection, I realized that about 35-40% of what comes out of my mouth is stuff like this. Not big gaping legitimate worries, but irrelevant planning or musing about stuff that might not happen. During these moments, SO had always looked... patiently tolerant, not interested. So it would probably be good for all of us if I talked 35-40% less. Who knows, maybe something more worthwhile to talk about may take its place.

Title	Weekly Self-Reflection Thread: 05/09/2016
Author	fhigurethisout
Upvotes	11
Comments	31
Date	May 9, 2016 10:54 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/4im8ov/weekly_selfreflection_thread_05092016/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/weekly-self-reflection-thread-05092016.210006 https://theredarchive.com/post/210006

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