I saw a post on the AskTRP sub yesterday.
In it a man described stumbling upon on evidence that his LTR had cheated on him ruthlessly a couple years back. So what did he do? He dropped her instantly. Good move on his part.
While I don't advocate snooping around emails and social media to dig up possible dirt I will say he did the right thing by confronting her and kicking her to the curb.
However in his post someone dropped a comment titled "Be like Pete" and I clicked it. It took me to an archived post from 2016 on the Relationships sub in which a woman had posted that she got dumped for suggesting to her then BF that she was going to visit in an Ex in another country.
Read the post for yourself..
Lessons learned:
-Have abundance Mentality: Pete gave no fucks. He knew he could find another chick and didn't care about spending the last 6 months with her. It's easy to drop a girl for bad behavior if you have an abundance mindset aka the confidence in knowing you can easily find more woman. A beta in scarcity mindset would convince himself to keep a bad woman around for fear of being alone.
-Never keep a woman in your life who would even suggest visiting an Ex. It's a huge red flag but she also tried to spin it on him saying he was abusive for not thinking she should do it.
-Men don't want to be friends with good looking women. She honestly thought her ex was just platonic and yet the moment she told him she got dumped he said "great now we can bang." (Paraphrasing that)
I did a video on this here if you prefer audio narration of these lessons.
[–]RedHoodhandles1 points [recovered] (6 children) | Copy Link
That hamstering. Priceless.
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[–]Six_spoked_wheel1 points [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
You wouldn't hate a dog for sniffing its own shit. Women are whores. Love them for what they are, dont resent them for what you wish they were. Thats the territory of married women.
[–]rty96chr 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Six_spoked_wheel1 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Ding ding ding. Im not sure about the "try to change them" bit though. They feel entitled to an alpha prince charming who will change himself upon seeing how unhappy she is. After all, her emotions rule her entire existence, why shouldnt they also rule yours? That seems to be the thinking anyways
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She's living on your dime and accomplishments. You absolutely have the right to check her stuff as a husband.
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[–]Blazer8081 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Pete's approach was the best in my opinion, mention boundaries, don't tell her what your stance is on them. Observe if she crosses them or not and then act accordingly.
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[–]helenvsgladys3 points [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
Gay, dude. Why do you view this as your job.
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[–]helenvsgladys1 points [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
She feels protected because you become noticeably threatened by her harmless loser orbiters? Nah.
[–]Whitefarmer 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]helenvsgladys1 points [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
You think yours doesn't? And you think it's because you made her feel "safe" by complaining about them?
[–]Whitefarmer 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]helenvsgladys1 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
So the answer is no. You honestly think your girlfriend doesn't have orbiters. And you honestly believe it's because you don't "let" her.
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[–]yomo861 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
You are reading more into this than there is. Old ex just wanted to fuck. Worst case, since the dude was already in Amsterdam, was a flake or LMR. Cheap, easy and good sex.
[–]Whitefarmer 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Six_spoked_wheel1 points [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
Yeah my LTR brings up her orbiters all the time. Its a shit test. Be chill.
Edit: most importantly dont do what you're doing. Youre actively bringing up the thought of them fucking her. Thats the first step down an admittedly very long but still very dangerous road called losing frame
Edit: on second thought this entirely depends on your tone and the dynamic.
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